1. Bill Clinton, Al Gore, Bill Gates
and GOd
Bill Clinton, Al Gore and Bill Gates all die in a plane
crash. They are standing before God, seated on his throne.
God asks Al: "What do you believe?"
Al says: "I believe in the earth. I believe
if we don't protect it, the whole earth will die."
God says: "I like that, come sit at my left.
Bill Clinton, what do you believe?"
Bill Clinton says: "I believe in people.
I believe the people should be empowered. I believe no one has the
right to tell someone else what to do."
God says: "I like that, come sit on my right.
OK Bill Gates, what do you believe?"
Bill Gates says: "I believe you're in my seat."
2. The unknown soldier
A delegation from the USA came to
Norway, and after the grand reception and everything, asked to be taken
to the monument of the unknown soldier. The hosts became very confused,
and didn't know what to do - they had no such thing - they feared a diplomatic
incident!
Suddenly - one of the hosts said - follow me! So - desperate
as they were - they did - they followed him. Suddenly - they came to a
hill, on top of which there was a statue of Sibelius.
Puzzled, everyone asked him what was that supposed
to be! and so he explained: "Sibelius was very very famous as a composer,
but as a soldier - he was completely unknown!" before anybody decides
to correct me if i m wrong - DON'T CONFUSE ME WITH FACTS!
3. If Clinton and Yeltsin Held Their Summits in
a Private On-line "Chat Room" (Long but funny)
PrezBubba
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Boris}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
DRUNKBORIS: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
PrezBubba
What's up?
DRUNKBORIS: nmh
DRUNKBORIS: How's the knee?
PrezBubba
They may have to amputate
PrezBubba
<------just kidding
DRUNKBORIS: lol
PrezBubba
BTW, are you going to join NATO or not?
DRUNKBORIS: no
PrezBubba
: (
PrezBubba
@@!~~~~$$$$$*U*S*A* *PUNTER* *LOADED* $$$$$~~~~@@
PrezBubba
$t@tU$-----> *WAITING FOR A VICTIM*
DRUNKBORIS what u gonna punt me? I
got the anit punt on.
PrezBubba
@@!~~~~$$$$$*U*S*A* *PUNTER* *UNLOADED* $$$$$~~~~@@
PrezBubba
age/sex check
DRUNKBORIS: 66/m
PrezBubba
51/m
PrezBubba
come on....join NATO
DRUNKBORIS: I WILL NOT JOIN NATO!!!!!
PrezBubba
k
PrezBubba
No need to yell
PrezBubba
What about arms reduction?
PrezBubba
well
PrezBubba
?
PrezBubba
you there?
DRUNKBORIS: <---sorry
DRUNKBORIS: I got an IM from some borscht
belt babe
PrezBubba
kewl
PrezBubba
Was she looking for some Cyber?
DRUNKBORIS: No...just complaining about
the rampant unemployment! Asking ME if I could do something about it!
DRUNKBORIS:
PrezBubba
LMAO
PrezBubba
So are you gonna lose the jukes?
DRUNKBORIS: jukes?
PrezBubba
oops...
PrezBubba
nukes
DRUNKBORIS: yeah, sure....why not.
: )
PrezBubba
wtg, Boris!
DRUNKBORIS: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
PrezBubba
<---feels very diplomatic right now
DRUNKBORIS: o.k. are we done cuz i
wanna go to Best Lil Chathouse now
PrezBubba
guess so...I'm going to AskFemaleAnything Room
DRUNKBORIS: you're sick!
PrezBubba
; )
DRUNKBORIS: Anyway, c ya
PrezBubba
peace, out.
4.