Aftermaths, Part 94

by Geri ([email protected])

Rating: Mostly PG-13, but NC-17 for overall story

Pairing: Snape/Lupin, Theodore/Blaise

Warning: AU; events that occurred at the end of Order of the Phoenix were significantly altered from the book.

Sequel to: Always, Summer Vacation, For Old Time's Sake, Three's a Crowd, Return of the Raven, Phoenix Reborn, and Phoenix Rising.

Summary: The various characters deal with the aftermath of the war, and Snape and Lupin try to build a family together with Theodore and Dylan. However, some people are unable to let go of the past...

Author's note: {} Indicates character's unspoken thoughts.

Disclaimer: Characters belong to J.K. Rowling, except Hob, who belongs to William Mayne; no money is being made off this story; consider it a little wish fulfillment on my part.
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Things were not going much better for Draco. He was both embarrassed and confused about what had happened at the Ball. Sure, he liked Avery a lot; she was a good friend, someone he could talk to. But he hadn't really thought of her as a girlfriend.

"Then why'd you ask her to the Ball?" Damien asked skeptically, when Draco, near his wit's end, confided in his housemate. He wasn't really that close to Damien, but he didn't have anyone else he could talk to. Serafina was the one he usually confided in, but since she was the topic of conversation, he obviously couldn't discuss this with her. And he couldn't really see himself discussing his love life with Crabbe and Goyle, either. He might have asked Lupin for advice, but he had gone back home with Snape, leaving Draco feeling irritable and a little abandoned, although he knew that was silly.

"Er...well, she's my friend," Draco replied somewhat lamely.

"Goyle's your friend, too, but I didn't see you asking him to the Ball," Damien pointed out, and Draco flushed. "C'mon, Malfoy, I saw how nervous you were when you asked her to the Ball. You don't get that nervous when you're just asking a 'friend' out."

"We can't all be as smooth as Dylan Rosier," Draco said sulkily.

"Oh, what's the big deal, Draco?" Damien asked. "There's nothing wrong with liking Serafina. Sure, she's a little weird, but she's a decent sort." Draco bristled, and Damien grinned at him. "Feeling protective of her, are you?" Draco blushed again. "She's a pureblood, so your mum can't object," Damien continued cheerfully. "And she's actually quite pretty when she dresses up a bit."

That was true, and even though Serafina had gone back to wearing her normal plain robes and no makeup, Draco still found himself noticing how beautiful her violet eyes were, or how pretty she looked when she smiled--which she did a little more often now, mostly when playing with her new kitten, Bast. Draco was pleased that she liked his gift so much, but it irked him that she was bestowing most of her smiles on the cat, not him. It was difficult to tell what she was thinking, because when she wasn't playing with Bast, she had her usual blank, emotionless mask fixed on her face. Not once had she said anything about what had happened at the Ball, but then again, she rarely initiated conversations with him to begin with; she usually just listened to him talk.

But he missed those conversations, even if they were a bit one-sided. So he gathered up his courage and sought her out in the common room one evening. She was sitting by the fire reading a book while nearby, Bast pounced on Millicent's cat, Sable, trying to get him to play with her; the older cat hissed irritably at the kitten in response.

"Serafina?" he said, sitting down beside her.

She glanced up for a moment, before burying her face back in the book again. Maybe it was just the heat of the fire, but her face looked just a little flushed. "Oh, hi Draco."

"Listen," Draco said awkwardly, "um, about the Ball..."

"Someone spiked the punch," Serafina interjected quickly. "It's no big deal; you don't have to apologize or anything."

Draco felt a bit hurt and offended, although he had been trying to apologize in a roundabout way. "Was what I said really so bad?" he asked. "I mean, if I'd said it without drinking the punch, would you be mad at me?" He sort of wished that she had drunk the punch, too; it might have given him some clue as to how she really felt about him.

Serafina's eyes widened, and she looked a little flustered and unsure of herself, which strangely, made Draco feel better. He was glad to see a little emotion in her face for a change, glad to know that he was able to make her feel SOMETHING, even if she was upset with him. She was silent for a long moment, then carefully asked, "Are you saying that you meant what you said that night?"

"I...I think I must have," Draco replied hesitantly, because he was still trying to make up his mind about that. "Snape said it was a form of Truth Potion--at first, anyway. He changed his story later, but I think he was trying to protect Theodore." Draco knew that Theodore and Blaise really were involved in a relationship, so he didn't buy Snape's vague explanations of a hallucinogen or botched potion.

"Shouldn't you know whether you meant it or not?" Serafina asked, looking a bit cross.

"It's just...a bit sudden," Draco said apologetically. "I'm a little confused."

"Me too," Serafina admitted, her expression softening a bit.

"But at least one thing I said is true," Draco continued. "I'm glad you're my friend, because you like me for myself, not because I'm a Malfoy." He looked at her anxiously. "Can we at least still be friends? I...I wouldn't want to lose that."

"Neither would I," Serafina said quietly, and Draco smiled in relief, and she gave him a tentative smile in return. That made him feel bold enough to lay his hand over hers for just a moment, although he quickly removed it when she started to tense.

"Sorry," he said.

"It's okay," Serafina replied, blushing and looking down at her book. "It's just...I never expected to have to worry about...boyfriends or dating or anything like that. My parents planned to marry me off to Theodore. Neither of us was really happy about it, but we didn't have a choice."

"Well, you can relax, because I don't think that's likely to happen now," Draco said drolly, and Serafina actually laughed a little.

"No, I don't think so," she agreed.

"Friends?" Draco asked, holding out his hand.

"Friends," Serafina said, and shook it.

"For now," Draco added.

Serafina hesitated, then echoed, "For now," and Draco was content with that for now. Neither of them was quite ready to start a romance yet, but there was hope for the future.

Bast suddenly jumped onto Draco's lap, breaking the tension and smoothing over any awkwardness that might have resulted from their conversation. He and Serafina played with the kitten, laughing at her antics as she batted at a piece of string they dangled to amuse her.
***

While the other students were struggling with their feelings, Aric was feeling unusually cheerful. He was the one who had spread the news about Theo and Blaise through the wizarding world. Well, actually, many of the other students had probably owled home about it, but Aric was fairly sure that he was the first one to get the word out. The other students had been escorted back to their dorms, but Snape had sent Aric back to the dorm alone after dismissing him from his office. It was uncharacteristic of the Potions Master to be so careless, but he had probably been preoccupied with his concern about Theodore. Aric had taken advantage of that, making a quick detour to the Owlery to send a message back home to his parents, who in turn made sure to send out messages to the other pureblood families.

Selima Snape had shown up in a rage early the next morning, Aric had later heard. The Snapes and Zabinis were trying to brush off the incident, with Snape claiming that the spiked potion had made the students say and do irrational things, but no one really believed it. Besides, Aric had heard Snape say in his office that it was a Potion of Liberation, and he had moved Theo and Blaise into different rooms, which he wouldn't have done if he really believed that they weren't lovers. Aric took a gleeful pleasure in his cousin's misfortune, in seeing Theo become the center of a scandal, not to mention being forcibly separated from his lover. Perhaps it was a small and petty thing, but it seemed like a nice first step in his revenge, even if Aric wasn't really responsible for it; he almost wished he really had been the one who spiked the punch. And on second thought, it wasn't really so petty after all. The scandal would make it difficult for Theo to find a bride in the future, and the whole point of Theodore being adopted into the Snape family was for him to produce an heir. The future of the Snape family was now in turmoil, and perhaps Lady Selima would even try to have him disinherited. Unlikely, since Snape was now the head of the family, but Aric would still enjoy watching the Snapes fight among themselves.

Another little bonus was that since Snape was also gay, some of the parents were concerned that the Potions Master might be trying to "corrupt" his male students. Aric doubted that Snape would actually be fired over it, but he enjoyed watching the chaos that resulted. It was too bad that Theo wasn't here to see Aric gloating, but he'd be back soon enough. In the meantime, Zabini was keeping a low profile and not venturing out of the dorm much. He didn't look quite as upset as Aric had thought he would, but he still looked a bit mopey--missing his boyfriend already, no doubt--and would glare at Aric whenever their paths crossed, as if he was personally responsible for what had happened.

Yvonne was offended by his gloating, and had gotten over her infatuation with him, but Aric didn't really mind. He was already tired of her constant chatter, anyway. Yvonne had never particularly liked Theo before, so Aric didn't know why she should care what people said about him now, except that the Slytherin girls loved stories about star-crossed lovers. They all thought Snape and Lupin were an oh-so-romantic couple, and maybe the fact that Theo had a male lover had suddenly turned him into a tragic romantic hero. Aric thought it was all very silly, particularly the thought of the ill-tempered, greasy-haired Potions Master that everyone had hated suddenly becoming "romantic" just because he was shagging a guy instead of a girl.

Anyway, he didn't really care what those stupid girls thought, except that he couldn't really share his glee with anyone, since they were all taking Theo's side. So when he went to the clinic with Bleddri to serve his detention, Aric eagerly told Takeshi all the latest gossip; he had not seen the mediwizard since before Christmas, as his duties at St. Mungo's had kept him away from the clinic for the past few days, at least during the hours that Aric was working. He knew that Takeshi had an idealistic streak in him--why else was he volunteering to work with werewolves in his free time?--but he had always listened indulgently to Aric's gossip or complaints about his classmates before, occasionally shaking his head a little. So Aric was a little surprised when his friend frowned at him disapprovingly.

"Is it really so wrong for two people to fall in love with each other?" Takeshi asked quietly. "Does it really make so much difference that they're both male?"

"Of course it does," Aric said, scowling, feeling rather put out that the mediwizard was putting a damper on his glee. "This will cause a huge scandal in the wizarding world," he said, his tone of voice changing from smug to sullen. "I'm surprised you haven't heard about it yet."

"Maybe I have better things to do with my time than listen to malicious gossip," Takeshi retorted. "Honestly, Aric, you should try to be a little more open-minded. You can't tell me that none of the students at Durmstrang are gay."

Aric shrugged. "Well, sure, some of the guys mess around with each other," he said matter-of-factly. "And some of the girls, too, I imagine. But nobody goes around flaunting it." Aric sneered. "Not like Snape and Lupin. Everyone knows that it's just for fun, that you can't take it seriously. A pureblood is expected to make a proper marriage, after all, and you won't be able to make a good marriage if word gets around that you're queer." He smirked. "Like Theo."

"Don't you think it's time that you stopped this ridiculous vendetta against your cousin?" Takeshi sighed impatiently.

"Ridiculous?" Aric cried indignantly. "He killed my uncle!"

"Thaddeus Nott killed your uncle!" Takeshi snapped. "Theodore was just a child at the time!"

"Since when are you and Theo such good friends?" Aric asked suspiciously.

"We're not," Takeshi said, sounding exasperated. "I barely know him. We were in different years and Houses, and I spoke to him in passing maybe once or twice during my entire time at Hogwarts."

"Then why are you taking his side?" Aric demanded.

"Because any reasonable person could see that an eight-year-old child cannot be held responsible for a murder that his father committed!"

"You weren't there!" Aric shouted.

"Neither were you!" Takeshi snapped. He took a deep breath, then slowly exhaled and said in a gentler voice, "You must let go of your hatred, Aric, or it will poison your soul."

"Very poetic," Aric sneered. "Is that a Ravenclaw trait? Or maybe it's a Japanese thing."

Takeshi gave him a look that managed to be angry, hurt, and disappointed all at the same time. The first made Aric feel defiant; the second made him feel a little guilty; and the third irritated the hell out of him. The mediwizard was only three years older than him, so where did he get off lecturing Aric and acting all disappointed like Aric had let him down somehow?

"I get enough of that kind of crap from Lupin!" Aric snapped. "You're not my teacher or my father or my brother, so don't tell me what me to do!"

"I thought I was your friend," Takeshi said in a level voice. "Although right at this moment, I can't say that I like you very much." Then he turned on his heel and stalked away, retreating to the workshop where he brewed his potions. He very carefully and deliberately shut the door behind him with a quiet "click" instead of slamming it, which annoyed Aric even more, for some reason.

"The high and mighty mediwizard is so mature that he doesn't slam doors even when he's angry," Aric muttered under his breath. Then he jumped a little when he heard the sound of mocking laughter behind him, and turned around to face Bleddri. He expected his teacher to start chewing him out, too, but the werewolf looked more amused than angry.

"Congratulations," Bleddri drawled sarcastically. "Not many people can make Takeshi lose his temper--the last one was some idiot from the Ministry who was complaining about the equal rights bill and how it allows werewolves to run loose on the streets. Takeshi is notoriously patient, although not quite as bad as Lupin. Then again, I suppose only someone with the patience of a saint could put up with Snape on a regular basis."

"And what will you do if I tell Snape you said that?" Aric said without thinking, glaring at his teacher.

"Oh, I don't think you'd want to do that, Mr. Dietrich," Bleddri said softly and smiled--a wide, malevolent grin that exposed his sharp canine teeth. "I am not a saint, after all, and nowhere near as patient as Takeshi or Lupin."

"Heh heh," Aric laughed nervously, turning pale and taking a step back. "Just kidding."

I don't have much of a sense of humor, either," Bleddri told him. "Get back to work, Mr. Dietrich." Aric nodded and turned back to the boxes of donated food and clothing he was supposed to be sorting. Bleddri started to walk away, then paused and said, "By the way, it's none of my business, but you don't have many friends, Mr. Dietrich. Do you really want to be alienating one of the few you have left?"

"I have lots of friends at Durmstrang," Aric snarled, "and you're right, it's none of your business...meaning no disrespect, sir."

Bleddri just shrugged and walked off, saying, "Your loss."

Takeshi didn't emerge from his workshop that day, and Aric didn't see him again on the following days, either. When he asked Bleddri about it, the werewolf said, "He has a full-time job at St. Mungo's, you know. They let him come in on work time a few hours a week as their sop to the Werewolf Support Program, but mostly he volunteers his time during his off-hours."

So Aric was unable to make up with his friend before returning to Hogwarts, which left him feeling a little uneasy, although he stubbornly refused to acknowledge, even to himself, that he had done anything that he needed to apologize for.
***

Vacation was almost over and they would be returning to Hogwarts the next day, so Snape was helping Lupin pack their bags. "It will be good to get back to school," he said.

"But things went pretty well, don't you think?" Lupin asked.

"Apart from the Yule Ball fiasco," Snape said with a scowl.

"Maybe in the long run it was a good thing," Lupin said thoughtfully. "Selima surprised us all by accepting the situation, and now Theodore knows that his grandmother still loves him even though she knows the truth about him and Blaise."

"'Love' is a rather strong word, Lupin," Snape said uneasily.

"Well, you can't deny that she cares about him, Severus," Lupin said in that patient tone he always used when he was trying to get Snape to see something he would rather not. It made him sound a bit like a teacher lecturing a student, and Snape always found it annoying. "She has accepted Theo as her grandson, even had that heir's ring made for him, and stood by him after the 'fiasco,' as you put it. I think that she does love him, even though she might not be ready to call it 'love' yet. And another good thing that's resulted from the 'fiasco' is that it's brought her and Prospero back together again."

"They're not 'together,' Lupin," Snape growled, his scowl deepening.

"You know what I mean, Severus," Lupin said. "They're speaking to one another again, and they've been given a second chance at love, if they care to take it." He smiled tenderly at Snape. "As we were given a second chance." Snape just grunted, and Lupin asked gently, "Do you really dislike Prospero, Severus?"

"Well, his cheerfulness gets on my nerves a bit, though I can see why YOU like him," Snape grumbled, and Lupin chuckled. "And it's a little strange for me to see someone courting my mother. I'm still getting used to the idea that she had 'suitors' before she met my father."

Lupin smiled. "Yes, I know that was a bit of a shock. But in hindsight, perhaps we shouldn't have been so surprised. Your mother is a very beautiful woman, and she must have been downright stunning when she was a young girl."

"It doesn't surprise me that men found her attractive when she was younger," Snape told Lupin. "What surprises me is that she actually had feelings for one of them--it surprises me that she has any feelings at all, outside of righteous indignation about how I failed in my duties as the Snape heir, that is."

"Most of your students probably thought that you didn't have any feelings other than the malicious pleasure you took in torturing them," Lupin pointed out, in a voice that was both gentle and chiding. "Appearances are deceiving." Lupin leaned over and nuzzled Snape affectionately. "As I should know."

"You're ruining my reputation, Lupin," Snape complained, but he relaxed a little, enjoying the caress, and Lupin grinned at him.

"You know, Sev," Lupin said casually, "maybe you should thank Lady Selima before we leave."

"What for?" Snape asked, scowling again.

"For accepting Theo and Blaise, of course, and smoothing things over with the Zabinis," Lupin replied impatiently. "I'm sure that it wasn't an easy thing for her to do, proper pureblood that she is. It goes against all her mores, everything she's been taught. Shouldn't we acknowledge that gesture?"

Lupin had that stubborn look in his eyes, the one that meant it would be easier to pacify him than to argue about it. "Fine," Snape sighed. "Let's go."

"I think perhaps it would be better if you spoke to her alone," Lupin suggested.

"Didn't you just say that 'we' should acknowledge that gesture?" Snape asked sarcastically.

"It was a figure of speech, Severus. Besides, I think it would mean much more to her coming from you than it would from me."

Snape glared at his lover. He knew that Lupin wanted all of them to be a real family together, but something inside him stubbornly rebelled against the werewolf's efforts to push him and his mother closer together. Then abruptly, he sighed and gave in. He didn't want to argue with Lupin all night, so he might as well get it over with. Besides, he could afford to be magnanimous since they were going back to Hogwarts tomorrow. While he had, surprisingly, enjoyed most of his stay at Snape Manor, he felt relieved to be going back home. The mansion still did not quite feel like "home" to him, and while he'd been getting along fairly well with his mother, things were still a bit strained and awkward between them at times.

"Fine," Snape growled, and went in search of his mother. He encountered Vorcher along the way, and the house-elf informed him that Selima was working in the study. As he headed downstairs, Snape grudgingly admitted to himself that he should be grateful to his mother for accepting Theodore's relationship with Blaise, if only for Theodore's sake. He had been afraid that Selima would reject Theodore and hurt him when she found out about it, but much to Snape's relief, she had not. Feeling a little more cheerful, Snape made his way to the study and saw that the door was open. He peered through the doorway and saw Selima and Theodore sitting together at what used to be his father's desk, poring over some financial ledgers. Theodore's head was bent over one of the ledgers, a look of concentration on his face. Snape was about to announce himself and walk in when Selima looked over at Theodore and smiled at him in what was almost a tender manner; Theodore, still bent over the ledger, did not notice.

"Sales were down over the past year," Theodore said, "but they've gradually been increasing since the summer--because the war ended?"

"Very good, Theodore," Selima said approvingly. "War is bad for business, particularly for luxury items like artwork. No one really wants to buy paintings or sculptures when they're worried about being killed."

Theodore looked up and smiled at her, the shy, vulnerable smile that the boy had often given Snape and Lupin when he had first moved in with them, when he was just beginning to trust them. A sudden pang of some emotion Snape could not immediately identify ran through his body, and he stepped away from the door, out of sight.

As he leaned against the wall, trying to regain his composure, he knew that he was lying to himself. He knew what the emotion was, because it was very similar to what he had felt every time he had watched Lupin laughing with the Marauders, or watched James Potter being fussed over by his loving, adoring parents: jealousy. Except that he wasn't quite sure whether he was jealous of Selima or Theodore. He was, as he had once told Lupin, not very good at sharing the people he loved. Lupin's closeness to Potter junior and Black still evoked twinges of jealousy in him every now and then, although for the most part he was content because he was finally first in Lupin's heart, and also because Black and Potter had grown closer to each other and a little less reliant on Lupin now that Black and Branwen and Potter had formed their own family. And Snape was used to sharing Dylan, who had already had a family when he first arrived at Hogwarts. He had never expected that Dylan would become a part of his own family, so he was simply grateful that Dylan was his son now, and didn't begrudge the boy his love for his late parents--who had, after all, been Snape's friends--and his great-uncle and aunt. It was a little ironic that Theodore had been so jealous of Dylan, because he belonged solely to Snape--and to Lupin, of course--in a way that Dylan did not. Theodore had feared and hated his parents, and been abandoned by his remaining blood relatives after Thaddeus and Marta were killed; he had no one left to depend on but his surrogate family. Snape had never really thought of it that way before, but it suddenly made him jealous to see his son smiling at Selima with the same affection that had always been reserved for himself and Lupin before.

At the same time, a part of him was also jealous of the way that Selima had begun to treat Theodore with something very close to maternal affection. It was very subtle and limited, compared to, say, the way that the Potters had treated James, and most outsiders probably would still have considered her reserved, even cold. But it was still more kindness than she had ever shown to Snape as a child. She had not actively tried to hurt him the way his father had, but she had never protected him, either. He had hated her for that when he was a child, but as an adult, with a little more perspective, he had resigned himself to it. Her family was as cold as she was, so it was no surprise that she had turned out just like them. Selima could not love her son because she was probably incapable of loving anyone--at least, that was what Snape had assumed. But it seemed that she had loved Prospero, and she had certainly loved her friend Anya--enough so that she was willing to risk her reputation to help Anya's son win back his title. And now perhaps she had come to love Theodore as well. Somehow it hurt that his mother had been willing to defend the werewolf when she had not been willing to defend her own son, and it hurt that she had bonded so quickly and easily with Theodore when Snape had never been able to win any praise or affection from his parents as a child. He had assumed all along that the problem was with her, but maybe there had been something about him that had made it impossible for his mother to love him. Perhaps it was simply that he looked so much like his father, whom she had been forced to marry instead of her childhood sweetheart. After all, hadn't Snape hated Potter junior because he looked like his father?

{This is ridiculous,} Snape told himself. He was no longer a child but an adult, and far too old to be needing a mother to fuss over him. He had a family of his own now--Lupin, Dylan, and Theodore--and that was enough for him. He didn't need anything or anyone else. Had he not told Lupin that he would try to set aside his past grudges so long as Selima treated Theodore well? Had he not called a truce with his mother, saying that they should start over with a clean slate? His relationship with his mother had improved slightly; they had been speaking to each other civilly, if not very warmly, over the holidays. He had been pleased that Selima seemed to have accepted Theodore as her heir, and he had been relieved that she had decided to grant Theodore and Blaise her approval. He should be happy that things were going so well. He was happy about it--really.

Snape stood there for a few minutes, trying to tell himself--not very convincingly--how happy he was. "Thrilled, delighted, overjoyed," he muttered to himself sourly. He had been watching Theodore and Selima gradually grow closer over the past couple of months, and didn't know why it should suddenly upset him so much now. But it was one thing to see them chatting politely over tea, and another to see them alone, in a moment that was somehow intimate, looking so comfortable in each other's company, like mother and son. It struck a painful chord in Snape, knowing that he never had and most likely never would enjoy such closeness with his mother. And he was struck by a sudden irrational fear that Selima might steal his son away from him. He knew it was stupid and irrational, but he couldn't suppress a little surge of panic, the same feeling he used to get whenever Lupin got too close to someone else, or whenever Snape had done something particularly mean and petty, and was sure that this time Lupin would not forgive him.

He firmly told himself not to be so foolish, then took a deep breath, pushed himself away from the wall, and walked into the study.

"Oh, hello Father," Theodore said, looking up from the ledger in surprise.

"Have you packed yet?" Snape asked, much more sharply and curtly than he had intended. He silently cursed himself; he hadn't meant to take out his anger on Theodore, but old habits were hard to break.

"Not yet, sir," Theodore replied, looking puzzled and a little hurt.

"Well, we're leaving tomorrow, so perhaps you should get started," Snape said, trying to even out his voice and sound less gruff.

"Yes, sir," Theodore said obediently. He closed the ledger and rose from his seat. "Goodnight, Grandmother. Maybe we can go over these again some other time."

"Of course," Selima said. "Goodnight, Theodore." After the boy had left the room, she asked her son in a cool voice, "Are you in that much of a hurry to leave, Severus?"

Now that he was here, Snape had no idea what to say. A number of angry words were right on the tip of his tongue, but he knew that he would look like a fool if he said them out loud. Remembering his original purpose, he said stiffly, "Lupin wanted to thank you for what you did for Theodore and Blaise."

Was it just his imagination or did Selima look disappointed for a split-second? "You may tell the Professor that his thanks are unnecessary, since I didn't do it for his sake," she replied, her voice still cool.

"Then for whose sake did you do it?" Snape snapped, the words slipping out of his mouth before he could stop them. "For Theodore's sake? For the sake of your long-lost love and thwarted school romance? I never pictured you being so sentimental, Mother."

"What are you so angry about, Severus?" Selima asked. "Isn't that what you wanted, for the boys to be together? Would you prefer it if I forbade Theodore to see Blaise, and screamed that he was dishonoring the Snape name?"

"Isn't that what you told me?" Snape asked sharply. "That I was disgracing the family name by flaunting my pet werewolf in public? But all of a sudden, you're perfectly fine with the idea of a werewolf heading the Diggory family, and with the idea of your grandson having a male lover!"

"I have accepted your choice of heir!" Selima cried. "I have welcomed your werewolf lover and your foster son into my home! Yes, I am helping Cyril, whom I thought was your friend and Lupin's, and yes, I accepted that Theodore has chosen a male lover! You yourself told me that you would not allow him to be disowned, so I thought that meant you approved! I not only accepted it, I convinced the Zabinis to go along with it as well, even though that means that Theodore might never sire an heir for the Snape family! What more do you want from me, Severus?!"

"I want nothing from you!" Snape shouted, more angry with himself than he was with her. It was stupid to have brought it up at all; they couldn't change the past and he couldn't force her to start acting like a loving mother. Even if by some miracle that happened, he would have no idea how to react. He should have just stuck to their truce, but the old childish feelings of jealousy and resentment had boiled over before he could contain them.

"I thought we had declared a truce," Selima said, looking a little confused.

"We did," Snape said curtly. "Forget what I just said, then. I'll abide by the terms of the truce--but don't forget that you promised not to hurt Theodore."

"I have not forgotten," Selima said quietly, and Snape turned and swept out of the room, his black robes billowing around him.
***

Back in the study, Selima sighed wearily. She should have known that the uneasy truce between herself and her son was too good to be true. She felt as if her past kept coming back to haunt her, first in the form of Cyril, her old friend's son, and then Prospero, her former love, and now Severus's renewed resentment about his childhood. She supposed she could not blame him for hating her. She had not asked for his forgiveness, because she did not think he would give it, nor did she think she deserved it. She had always despised people who could not accept the consequences of their actions and tried to justify themselves with whining excuses. But she had tried, in a way, to make up for her mistakes by being a better guardian to Theodore than she had to Severus. And to be honest, she had come to care about Theodore for his own sake. She had been furious when Priscilla had gloatingly passed on the gossip about the Yule Ball, but when she had confronted Theodore and he had offered to return the heir's ring, she had realized that she did not want to lose her grandson. And when she had seen Blaise, looking so much like her old love, her resistance had crumbled. She wanted Theodore to be happy, even if it meant the Snape line might come to end. He could always adopt an heir, she supposed, although orphaned pureblood children were not that easy to come by.

But somehow her efforts to help Theodore had made things worse between Selima and her son. She didn't know what to do; she doubted that Severus was in the mood to listen to any explanations or apologies. She could only hope that his fit of anger would fade, at least enough so that he wouldn't be tempted to leave the Snape family again. She had already lost her son once; in a way, he was still lost to her, and she couldn't bear to lose Theodore as well. Selima tried to reassure herself with the thought that Lupin had fought too hard for this reconciliation to let Severus just walk away from his family, and for once she was grateful for his Gryffindor idealism.
***

Theodore, puzzled by his father's anger, had lingered outside the room to eavesdrop and was dismayed by what he heard. He felt a sick, sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, and a rising sense of panic made it hard for him to breathe. He had somehow done something to make Snape angry, to cause trouble between Snape and Selima. But Snape had said that he wasn't upset about Blaise...no, it seemed like Snape was angry because Selima had forgiven Theodore his male lover when she had not done the same for Snape. Snape had always been reluctant to visit the Manor, had always regarded his mother suspiciously even after he became heir again, and then Lord. Maybe Snape felt that Theodore was betraying him by getting too friendly with Lady Selima. Maybe he shouldn't have tried so hard to please his new grandmother. But everything had been going so well during this vacation, and Snape and Selima had seemed to be getting along with each other, more so than usual. Theodore didn't understand what had gone wrong...

Theodore heard Snape's footsteps and quickly ran out of sight down the hall, then Apparated up to his room so that Snape wouldn't realize he'd been eavesdropping. Dylan yelped in surprise when he suddenly appeared in the middle of the room.

"Boy, what's the rush, that you couldn't take the stairs?" Dylan asked good-naturedly, then caught sight of Theodore's face, and immediately looked concerned. "What's wrong?"

Theodore didn't want to talk about it, as if voicing his fears might make them come true. "Nothing," he said curtly. "The Professor had a fight with his mother."

"About what?" Dylan asked.

"I'm not sure," Theodore replied.

"Don't worry," Dylan said comfortingly. "They do seem to fight a lot. They've been getting along so well this Christmas, that I suppose they were overdue for another argument."

"I suppose," Theodore mumbled. He heard Snape coming up the stairs and down the hall; there was a brief silence as Snape seemed to pause for a moment outside the room that he and Lupin shared, then there was the sound of a door opening and closing. Lupin and Snape were talking, when suddenly Snape raised his voice in a sharp retort; Theodore could not make out the exact words, but he could hear the anger in his father's voice. He felt even worse than before, to know that he was the cause of an argument between Snape and Lupin.

"Hmm, guess the Professor is in a bad mood," Dylan said musingly, then looked over at his foster brother. "It's okay, Theo," he said gently. "It's quiet now; I don't think they're fighting. The Professor was probably just grumbling about something his mother did. Besides, Remus can always tease him out of his bad moods."

Theodore was afraid that this was something much more serious than Snape's usual irritability, but he forced himself to smile, trying to look unconcerned. "Yeah, you're probably right." He felt slightly better when there was no more shouting, just the muted sounds of a normal conversation. Theodore turned away and began to pack, but the fear still gnawed at him inside. He didn't want to be the Snape heir if it turned the Professor against him. Snape and Remus and Dylan were the only family he had now, and the thought of losing them terrified him. He didn't really want to lose his new grandmother, either, but he was willing to give her up, willing to give the heirship up entirely, rather than lose his father.

He jumped a little when he felt a hand touch his shoulder. "Theo," Dylan said anxiously, "are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes," Theodore said, trying to sound convincing. At least they would be leaving the Manor and going back to school tomorrow, and maybe everything would return back to normal. That thought calmed him down enough for him to smile at Dylan reassuringly. "I'm fine."

"Well...okay," Dylan said, still sounding a little dubious, but he didn't force the issue.
***

Lupin looked up and smiled when Snape entered the room, but his smile quickly faded when he saw his lover's face. "What's wrong, Severus?" he asked.

"Nothing," Snape said curtly.

"Did you have a fight with your mother?" Lupin asked, frowning.

"I don't want to talk about it," Snape snapped. He was a little ashamed of his feelings, and he was not in the mood to hear Lupin tell him that Selima had had a difficult life, and that he should make peace with his mother.

"Severus," Lupin said, laying a hand on Snape's arm, "don't you think that you should--"

Snape jerked his arm away and snarled, "I said I don't want to talk about it!" Lupin looked startled and hurt, and Snape immediately felt guilty. "Sorry," Snape said gruffly. "I'm just out of sorts; I think spending two weeks at Snape Manor has gotten on my nerves."

Lupin tentatively placed his hand on Snape's arm again, and relaxed when Snape did not pull away. He gently stroked Snape's arm and said with a smile, "Well, I must admit that you've been remarkably well-behaved these past two weeks. I suppose it must be a bit of a strain."

"Yes," Snape said, feeling relieved. "It goes against my Slytherin nature, after all."

Lupin still looked a little worried, but he kissed Snape and let the matter drop. "We'll be back at Hogwarts tomorrow."

"Thank Merlin," Snape sighed, and wrapped his arms around Lupin, pulling him close.

Part 95
 

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