Aftermaths, Part 113

by Geri ([email protected])

Rating: Mostly PG-13, but NC-17 for overall story

Pairing: Snape/Lupin, Theodore/Blaise

Warning: AU; events that occurred at the end of Order of the Phoenix were significantly altered from the book.

Sequel to: Always, Summer Vacation, For Old Time's Sake, Three's a Crowd, Return of the Raven, Phoenix Reborn, and Phoenix Rising.

Summary: The various characters deal with the aftermath of the war, and Snape and Lupin try to build a family together with Theodore and Dylan. However, some people are unable to let go of the past...

Warning: sexual overtones in a dream that Takeshi has about a wolf, although no actual bestiality takes place.

Author's note: {} Indicates character's unspoken thoughts.

Disclaimer: Characters belong to J.K. Rowling, except Hob, who belongs to William Mayne; no money is being made off this story; consider it a little wish fulfillment on my part.
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But Miss Avery turned out to be very unhelpful, when they called her to the office. "I didn't fight with Draco," she said, her voice and face expressionless.

"But something happened on Valentine's Day," Lupin persisted; Serafina shrugged.

"The other Slytherins say that you and Mr. Malfoy have not spoken to each other since Valentine's Day," Snape said in a menacing voice.

Serafina, however, was one of the few students who was not cowed by Snape. "He was acting obnoxious," Serafina said calmly, "so I told him not to talk to me until he was ready to behave like a human being again."

"That sounds like a fight to me," Snape said sarcastically, but Serafina shook her head.

"No, sir. I'm not the one that Draco's mad at."

"Then who is he mad at?" Lupin asked gently.

"It isn't my place to tell you that," Serafina replied. "It's...personal. A matter of honor. Draco has to work it out for himself."

Lupin sighed; there was that Slytherin notion of "honor" again. Lupin still did not entirely understand what it meant. Sometimes it was merely standing by your word and keeping your promise, regardless of the consequences, and at other times it seemed to mean protecting the reputation and blood purity of your family. Lupin didn't think that Serafina cared very much about blood purity, so perhaps she had promised Draco not to talk about the argument.

"I understand that you want to protect Draco's privacy, Sera," Lupin said carefully. "And I wouldn't want you to break your word. But it's already been two weeks, and Draco clearly hasn't been able to work it out on his own. He really needs our help. Can't you please give us some idea of what's bothering him?"

Serafina frowned, looking very thoughtful, and was silent for a few minutes. Lupin waited patiently, and when Snape opened his mouth to scold the girl, Lupin held up a hand to stop him. Snape scowled, but closed his mouth and waited. Finally she said, "I don't think that you're the right person to help him with this, Professor."

"Why don't you let us be the judge of that?" Snape snapped.

Lupin motioned again for him to be quiet. "Then who can help him, Sera?"

Serafina hesitated before speaking, seeming to choose her words very carefully. "Draco has to decide whether he's going to let go of the past or not. He is the only one who can make that decision." And she refused to say anything more, not even when Snape threatened her.

"Miss Avery, I order you to tell me exactly what happened with Mr. Malfoy on Valentine's Day!" Snape shouted, although he knew as a Slytherin and former Death Eater that it was unwise to give an order that you knew would not be obeyed, as it diminished one's authority.

"I'm sorry, sir," Serafina said respectfully, "but I cannot obey that order. You may punish me as you see fit."

Snape sighed, admitting defeat. "Oh, get out of here, Avery," he growled.

"If you change your mind, Sera," Lupin said quietly, "you can come see us at any time."

"But don't wait too long," Snape said dourly. "Let me remind you that Malfoy could have been sent to Azkaban if he had seriously injured Weasley."

Serafina just nodded and left Lupin's office.

"Well, that went very well," Snape said sarcastically.

"We did learn a few things," Lupin pointed out. "We learned that it wasn't a fight with Serafina that triggered this, and we learned that it has something to do with Draco's past. Perhaps we should see if any of the other teachers or students noticed anything that day at Hogsmeade."

"I'm sure they would have said something by now if they had," Snape said. "But I don't really have any better ideas, so we might as well give it a try."

"It's possible that someone might have seen something without realizing that it was important," Lupin suggested.

None of the students recalled noticing Draco until he and Serafina had walked into The Three Broomsticks, not speaking to each other. Draco had spent the entire Hogsmeade day there, sitting in a corner sulking and nursing a mug of butterbeer; Serafina had eventually left and stopped by a couple of shops by herself.

Most of the teachers couldn't remember seeing Draco at all. "He was in The Three Broomsticks, wasn't he?" McGonagall asked. "Master Satoshi was supposed to be keeping an eye on the students in that area."

Satoshi smiled sheepishly when Lupin and Snape came to question him. "Guess I've been found out. Yes, Draco and Serafina were right outside the inn when we arrived at Hogsmeade, but I...ah...turned away to talk to Madam Rosmerta for just a minute, and when I looked up, they were gone."

Snape crossed his arms over his chest and glared at the tanuki. "You mean you were too busy flirting with Rosmerta to watch the students like you were supposed to." Satoshi sprouted pointed ears and whiskers, which he laid back and drooped, respectively, in a show of contrition. "Cut that out!" Snape snapped irritably.

"They weren't gone long," Satoshi protested. "Not more than fifteen minutes at most, and they came back unharmed. I just assumed they'd gone off to spend a little time alone together. Draco seemed a little upset, so I thought maybe they'd had an argument, but it didn't seem to be anything serious."

"And that's all?" Snape asked suspiciously. "They didn't say where they'd gone, you didn't see anyone else in the vicinity?"

"No," Satoshi said. "I didn't see anyone but the two of them, and all they said was that they'd gone for a walk. It looked like they had left the town and were coming back from the direction of the station, possibly the lake?"

"A romantic walk by the lake?" Lupin wondered. "It was common enough for couples to do so, before the recent safety restrictions."

Snape and Lupin left the castle and walked along the shore of the lake. It wasn't as if they expected to find anything there two weeks later, but Lupin thought perhaps it might give them some insight and besides, it was a good excuse to go for a stroll with Severus. He slipped his hand through his lover's, and since no one else was present, Snape did not object, although he did glower at Lupin briefly, just on principle. Despite his concern for Draco, Lupin couldn't help but smile.

"When we were students, I always wished that we could walk by the lake holding hands like other couples, and now finally my wish has come true."

"Silly werewolf," Snape said.

Lupin grinned at him. "I always wanted to do this, too," he said, then leaned over and kissed Snape on the mouth. It was not a heated kiss, like the ones that were initiated by the wolf's hunger and were usually a prelude to sex. Rather, it was a gentle kiss, slow and sweet, almost hesitant, like two teenage boys kissing for the very first time. Both Lupin and Snape were a little breathless when their lips finally parted.

"I love you, Severus," Lupin whispered, wrapping his arms around Snape's waist and leaning into his chest. He sighed as he felt Snape's arms enfolding him in an embrace that made him feel secure and content, loved and protected.

Snape kissed the top of Lupin's head and said, "I love you, too, Remus." They held each other in silence for a few minutes before Snape finally broke the mood by clearing his throat and saying, "However, this isn't helping us solve Mr. Malfoy's problems."

Lupin chuckled and reluctantly pulled away from Snape. "I suppose you're right, Sev," he said with a rueful smile. "I don't really understand what could have disturbed Draco so much. Could he and Serafina have met someone during their walk, perhaps a villager who called him a Death Eater?"

"Perhaps," Snape said, a little dubiously. "Or perhaps he and Serafina were simply talking about the past and it brought back bad memories."

"Do you think we should talk to Narcissa?" Lupin asked. "Do you think she might know what's bothering him?"

"I don't think so," Snape said. "She hasn't seen him since the Quidditch match in January, and whatever happened to upset him took place recently."

"I know," Lupin said, "but perhaps he might have mentioned something in his letters to home?"

Snape shook his head. "Draco is protective of his mother. Partly my fault, I'm afraid. When Lucius was in prison, I encouraged Draco to be 'the man of the family' and protect his mother. I was simply trying to distract him and keep him out of trouble, but he took it quite seriously."

"Draco loves his mother, Severus," Lupin said. "I don't think he needed much encouragement to want to protect her."

"In any case," Snape continued, "even if something was bothering him, he wouldn't tell Narcissa about it because he wouldn't want to worry her. So I don't think we should worry her, either, at least until we find out a little more about the situation."

"Very well," Lupin sighed. "I'll keep trying to get through to Draco. And you should keep trying, too, Sev. But perhaps you should try being a little nicer to him next time?" Snape scowled at him, and Lupin smiled. "Since the threatening act didn't seem to work."

"It's not an act," Snape grumbled.

"Yes, love, of course," Lupin said in a soothing and slightly patronizing tone.

Snape glared at him. "Besides, you're supposed to be the compassionate one."

"But Draco's a Slytherin," Lupin said. "He relates to you better."

"I suppose," Snape said doubtfully.

"You were a pureblood heir, like he is," Lupin explained. "And you know what it's like to be outcast and ostracized from that world. I was never really a part of it to begin with."

"I'll try," Snape said. "But I'm not really good at this sort of thing."

"I know you'll do your best, love," Lupin said with a warm smile. "And you've done quite well with Theo and Dylan."

Snape just grunted in response, looking a little embarrassed. "Should we head back to the castle?"

"Not just yet," Lupin said. "It's rather nice and peaceful out here, don't you think?"

"Yes," Snape agreed. "No noisy, whining brats."

So they sat on the shore of the lake, with Lupin leaning against Snape, comfortably resting his head on Snape's shoulder, and watched the sun set. They were a little late for dinner that evening, but when the other teachers asked them what had delayed them, Snape replied sourly, "It's the werewolf's fault," and Lupin just smiled and said nothing.
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After finishing his shift at St. Mungo's, Takeshi Kimura went to work at the charity clinic in Diagon Alley, then finally went home late in the evening. It had become his usual routine, and his coworkers at St. Mungo's no longer bothered to ask him if he wanted to go out for a drink or a bite to eat with them after work. The last time that he had stopped by his parents' restaurant, Takeshi's mother had gently scolded him for working too hard. It was true that he was essentially holding down two full-time jobs, but someone had to man the clinic. The werewolves couldn't do it by themselves; they needed at least one trained mediwizard or Healer there on a regular basis, especially now, with the full moon less than a week away. He could take some time off after the full moon passed, and things would get better once Sirius Black got the funding to hire paid workers to run the clinic. Unfortunately, the Ministry's attention was focused on the court battle between Lukas and Amos Diggory right now, and it was unlikely that any major budget requests--especially ones dealing with werewolves--would get approved until it was resolved. The anti-werewolf faction was being particularly obstinate, but if Lukas won his lawsuit, then Arthur Weasley and his supporters would gain the upper hand and be able to carry out their reforms.

But until then, there would be a lot of double shifts and late nights for Takeshi. He didn't mind; he had become friends with Lukas's pack and preferred their company to that of most of his human coworkers, many of whom had the typical pureblood prejudices and didn't understand why he would want to waste his free time helping werewolves. Still, his mother was probably right about him working too hard. Usually he liked to take a nice long soak in a hot bath before going to bed, but tonight he was too tired to bother; he took a quick shower and went to bed, and was asleep almost before his head hit the pillow.

Maybe overwork and exhaustion were responsible for the strange dream he had that night. In his dream he was naked, crouched down on all fours, his body trembling with anticipation as a large black wolf approached him. The wolf's eyes looked strangely familiar, but while he was trying to figure out why, the wolf mounted him and--

Takeshi cried out as he flung the blankets off himself, rising from sleep and from the bed with a sudden jerk. He sat there trying to catch his breath, his heart pounding and his body shaking with fear and shock. He was no bigot; he didn't think of the werewolves as monsters, and he had even slept with one of them, but he had never had any desire to make love to any of them in their wolf forms.

{Dreams are symbolic,} he reminded himself, forcing himself to take slow, even breaths in an effort to calm himself. {Just because I dreamed about a wolf doesn't mean that I really want to have sex with one.} His body, however, did not seem to think that the dream was symbolic, and was still in a painfully obvious state of arousal that made it difficult to think clearly.

A few more deep breaths, and a bit of Healing magic that was meant to calm a patient overcome with fear and pain, dulled the arousal enough for him to think more rationally. Professor Trelawney's classes had been a joke, and he had never given them a second thought after graduating, but he still had all of his old school textbooks, including his Divination texts. He walked over to the bookcase, and with a hand that trembled only slightly, pulled a book on dream symbology off the shelf. According to the book, a wolf symbolized fear of one's "animal" or aggressive and destructive side. It might also symbolize one's fear of sexuality.

Takeshi was a healer by profession and inclination, and would certainly prefer not to have to hurt anyone, but he was well aware of the destructive side of humanity, and was prepared to defend himself if he must. And while he was not promiscuous, he was no virgin. He'd had his share of lovers; he was comfortable with his sexuality; and his family was aware that he was gay and was fine with it. Of course it was difficult to be objective about oneself, but Takeshi didn't think that he had any subconscious fears about violence or sex.

But that was the western view of wolves. In Japan, wolves had been regarded as divine creatures and protective guardians; ironically, that had not prevented them from being hunted to extinction by the humans who had once revered them. But that didn't help Takeshi to interpret his dream, either. Why would he want to mate with a guardian spirit? Was he subconsciously seeking a lover who would protect him? He didn't particularly feel like he was in need of protection.

Maybe he was intellectualizing this too much. The most obvious explanation was that the wolf represented a werewolf that he was attracted to. There were several handsome men in Lukas's pack, but none that he had strong romantic or sexual feelings for. Takeshi's friend Kian had black hair (and black fur in his wolf form), and they had once slept together, but it had been more for comfort than desire. About a year ago, Kian's heart had been broken by a man whose handsome face had hidden a callous heart, who had rejected Kian and called him a monster when he realized that his suitor was not human. It had also cost Kian his job, because his would-be lover was also his coworker, and he had revealed KianÕs lycanthropy to everyone and got him fired. Fortunately for Kian's human paramour, it had been Takeshi that Kian had come to, crying his eyes out, not Lukas or one of the other werewolves, who might have been tempted to tear the man to pieces. Takeshi had started off trying to comfort his friend, and ended up making love to him in order to prove to Kian that he was not a monster, and that he was worthy of being loved and desired. But Takeshi's affection for Kian was more brotherly than romantic, and they had never slept together again. Kian had eventually recovered from his broken heart, and was now happily mated to another werewolf in the pack.

Was his dream trying to tell him that he was in love with Kian? Takeshi didn't think so; he was genuinely happy that his friend had found a new lover, and he didn't harbor any feelings of jealousy or regret. When he looked at them, or at Brian and Kyra or any of the other happy couples that he knew, it made him feel a little wistful that he had not found his own soulmate yet, but he knew that Kian was not that person. There were other dark-haired werewolves in Lukas's pack, but Takeshi was pretty sure that none of them were meant to be his lover, either.

Takeshi sighed and gave up. Maybe the dream meant nothing more than that he had been working too hard at the clinic and that it had been too long since he'd last had sex. He spent so much of his time with werewolves that it wasn't really unusual that he might start dreaming about them. It didn't really mean anything, he told himself, just that he'd had werewolves on his mind while his subconscious was thinking about getting laid, like two wires getting crossed in his head by accident. Yes, that was all it was.

Feeling much better, he put the dream symbology book back on the shelf, and went to bed. He was a little afraid that his dream might pick up where it left off (and at the same time, a small, guilty part of him was secretly hoping that it would), but he was too tired to stay awake any longer, and besides, he had to be up and back at work at the hospital early tomorrow morning. It wasn't long before he drifted off to sleep again...

He was not really surprised to find himself back in the same dream, still nude, still on his hands and knees. The wolf was there, too, and Takeshi whimpered with both fear and desire as the wolf mounted him.

But as soon as wolf's front paws touched his back, they turned into human hands that caressed his back and chest soothingly. It was definitely a man's chest that pressed itself against his back as his dream lover embraced him, and it was definitely a pair of human lips that tenderly kissed the nape of his neck. Takeshi moaned as his lover entered him from behind--that part of him was very human as well! There was a feeling of being joined and made whole, not just in body, but in spirit, and his heart sang with joy as his body sang with pleasure--a pure, clear, ringing, sustaining note, as if his body were an instrument being played by a master musician.

Takeshi knew that this was only a dream, but he had never before had a dream that was so intense, that felt so real. He could feel the warmth of his lover's breath on the back of his neck, could hear him panting softly. He could feel his dream lover's fingers firmly grasping his hips, digging into his flesh almost painfully as he continued to thrust, and it felt good, so good, so much better than any real lover Takeshi had ever had before.

He tried to see the face of his mysterious lover, but his head felt heavy, as if weighted down by iron, and he was unable to turn his head even a fraction of an inch to look behind him. His lover thrust into him harder, and suddenly, seeing his face no longer seemed to matter to Takeshi. His body was certainly able to move freely enough, frantically pushing backwards to meet his lover's thrusts, and his hand reached up, seemingly of its own volition, without Takeshi really thinking about it, to stroke his aching erection, moving in time with his lover's thrusts.

His lover said nothing the entire time, only panted and growled softly into his ear in a wolfish manner. It was maddening; Takeshi felt like he should know who his unseen lover was. The answer lay in his mind, just out of reach, but the pleasure that surged through his body with each thrust pushed aside his attempts to think, like a wave that washed away anything in its path, and he finally gave in and surrendered himself completely to the pleasure.

With one last, deep thrust, his lover howled and then bit down hard on the back of Takeshi's neck, and Takeshi gasped and woke in the throes of the most intense orgasm he'd ever had in his life. Afterwards, he lay there in bed, trembling and weeping because he was alone once more. It was silly to be weeping over a dream, over a lover whose name he didn't know, whose face he had never seen, but that sense of joy, of having found his soulmate had been real, and to wake to find himself alone was devastating. The truth was that he was lonely, and he was more just than a little envious of all those happy couples he knew.

There were several young nurses and mediwizards about the same age as Takeshi working at St. Mungo's, and none of them seemed eager to settle down yet, although one young pureblood's parents were trying to push him into an arranged marriage. "I'm too young to get married and settle down!" he had laughed. "I want to enjoy myself and have a little fun first!"

The others had laughed and nodded in agreement, but Takeshi was tired of casual lovers and no longer interested in "fun". Yet he had never been in love, although he had once or twice mistaken infatuation for love. Sometimes he wondered if he would ever find his true love, his soulmate, the person who would complete him. Maybe such things only existed in the fairy tales his mother had told him as a child.

"You must not be so impatient, little brother," Takeshi's older brother Ichiro had once told him, in a tone of mingled sympathy and amusement. "Not even the mightiest sorcerer can command love to appear when he wills it. Surely true love is worth waiting for?"

Takeshi thought, somewhat uncharitably, that it was easy for his happily-married brother to say that. He wondered if the dream could be a premonition, but although a few of his mother's ancestors had possessed the gift of Sight, Takeshi had never shown much aptitude for Divination before.

Maybe he ought to consider the dream a hopeful omen, but he felt more embarrassed than hopeful, lying there in damp and stained pajamas. A quick charm rendered his clothing clean and dry once more, but did little to ease his discomfort. It was stupid to feel so deeply affected by a wet dream, but it had all seemed so real...

Takeshi cursed under his breath and rolled over in bed, knowing that he needed to get some rest but was too agitated to fall asleep right now. If the dream was an omen, it was a decidedly unhelpful one--how on earth was he supposed to find this mystery lover when he didn't know his name or what he looked like? It was so unfair, to be offered a brief moment of joy, only to have it snatched away again. He wished that he'd never had the dream at all, because it left him feeling even more lonely than he had before.

Chapter 114

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