This page contains all the twisted character creations developed by GEP.Inc. To the common man, we know that it may seem that GEP.Inc is going about childish and non-productive activities, but we see them as a creative outlet that are the wave of the future. These figures are created through hour.....err.......minutes of hard work and bravery in using flammable contents. We at GEP.Inc feel that these figures are a true expression of our love for anarchy and destruction in general. In fact, thats the main goal in this division of GEP.Inc: death, destruction, and torment. So if you don't agree with our products or production methods, you can go play hide and go fuck yourself.
The Ringmaster
Attributes
Height: 4" (6" w/ hat)
Weight: 10 oz.
Origin: Sheriff of Notinham
Rank: Leader
Retro Fits: Official Nazi Cowboy Hat
Mutant Pig Chest Enhancement
Flammable Tape Armor
Weapon of Choice: Long sword
Story
The story behind The Ringmaster isn't too long and involved. A hole was carefully (ha!) drilled into the chest cavity of this figure and a stick of dixi-dynamite was inserted. The figure instantly exploded at the seals and was strewn about in seperate parts. Since we hadn't at the time discovered the wonderful world of welding, we used masking tape to get him back together. But now there was a problem. There was still a gaping hole in his chest where the explosives had been placed. Luckily we had a spare piece to cover the hole, but his piece happened to be the head of Hamlet from Toy Story. A little hot-glue worked wonders and the hole was soon covered. Following these manditory revisions, a piece of metal was found, so we did the only logical thing: ram it through his head. The figure was then completed with a cowboy hat and tassels to really give him that (insert adjective here) look.
R Me Buckos
Attributes
Height: 4"
Weight: 10 oz.
Origin: Robin
Rank: Mysterious minion
Retro Fits: Golf Tee Pegleg
Fanatic Cardboard Sign
Kick Action Arm
Weapon of Choice: Shotgun
Story
Unlike The Ringmaster, R Me Buckos story is a little more involved. This was are first creation as G.E.P. and it all began on hot summer afternoon. The three of us were lounging about on the 60th floor pool and commons along with one of our associate's signifigant other. Now this person was, how should I say, not liked by this particular member's partners. She just had a attitude problem that clashed with them which couldn't be helpped. Anyway, as we sat there, I held in my hand a fairly old Robin figure from one of the Batman movies. And this particular figure was in resemblence to the Robin played by Chris O' Donnell. Now if it was just us three, there would be no problem with this, but there was unfortunally a female presence among us at the time. Immediately, she began making over the fact that "O My God!!! Chris O' Donnell is soooooo cute!". This wouldn't seem to be that annoying, but when you here it every 30 seconds, it gets old really quick. Out of pure rage, I jumped up and yelled, "Yeah, you think he's cute. Well how 'bout now!" With that I took the figure and rubbed it to the ground till the face was gone and proceeded to draw an eye patch and blood on him. Next, my other associate took it and twisted its leg until it broke off. Now needless to say, she was slightly upset. But we didn't care. All three of us got a huge kick out of it. Thats when we thought,"Hey, now this figure looks pretty funny. Why not do it to other figures." From that point on, no crappy figure could withstand the wrath of G.E.P. Incorporated.
But this isn't the end of the R Me Buckos story. After this figure was in pieces, we decided that it was close enough to Fourth of July and we would blow it up. But wait a sec! That seems too simple and uncreative. So what did we do you ask? We froze it first in a plastic cup along with a M-80. After a few days, we took it out of the artic freezer and lit the firework. A large explosion ensued and it was left in shambles. But we couldn't just throw it away, so out came the tape and we fixed it. The arm, however, was not salvagable. All that was left of the arm was ashes. But hey, we still had a perfectly good leg.....that'll work. Being stupid, we now realized that he now had an arm, but no leg. So, we found a golf tee that was about the right size and his stump was soon fitted with a pegleg. Since he looked so crazy now, we decided to fit him with a sign that crazy fanatic people wear. And with that...R Me Buckos was born.
Lt. Dan
Attributes
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Story
Like what you see so far? There is so much more to come. Please email us your thoughts on our figures. The more positive support we get, the more figures we put up.