| Newsweek.......Newsweek.......Newsweek.......Newsweek |
| ....Insiders at Langley, the headquarters of the CIA, have leaked rumours of a significant breakthrough in the "War Against Terrorism". ....It appears that a British National, a Mr. Guy Fawkes, has been linked to the terrorist group "Al Queda". ....Langley has appealed to the British Government to exhume his remains in the hope that his mobile phone may have been buried with him. ....Fawkes joins the notorious list of early terrorists being currently investigated by the CIA whose names include; 1. Genghiz Khan 2. Attilla the Hun 3. Ivan the Terrible 4. Yoda 5. Robin Hood 6. Eric the Viking 7. George Washington 8. Robert the Bruce 9. Jean D'Arc 10. Spartacus. |
| ....Hopes of an early end to the prison riots Wormwood Scrubbs were quashed last night after Muslim prisoners burnt effigies of Trinny & Suzanne on the prison roof. The riots started after an episode of the popular fashion show featured pigskin shoes being modelled by celebrities. ....Police and SAS negotiators were dumbfounded last night when the rioters turned down an offer of �25,000 per man compensation ....An SAS spokesman hinted that three tunnels, code named "TOM, DICK, and HARRY, were being prepared should the need to storm the prison arise. ....Meanwhile, in Essex, the appeal for 4,900 virgins to placate the 70 rioters has ran into trouble. So far, only one lady volunteer has qualified and she is the Mother Superior of the local convent. The hunt continues..... |
| My Grandaughter, Lauren Beth Carey had her first birthday last week. She's walking and talking and taking her O Levels in June! |
| The hunt for the kidnapped effilant continues. The Jones family are said to be distraught with worry. The ruthless Osama Bin Geordie is the chief suspect. |
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| New German Pope celebrates his first Mass! |
| Geordies Stories Newsweek Exclusive...... SHREK in Porn Movie! Click here for shocking picture |
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