Just another Sunday and sweet FA.
I lie still. Warm, comfortable, and quite at one with the world. Ever careful not to disturb my in-head, hangover bringing on spirit level, I incline my head slightly to the right to check out the red neon display on the bedside clock. It痴 5-40am. It痴 also my day off and with a game of golf planned for the morning, drinks and cards with my mates at lunch time, a live Newcastle match on Sky in the afternoon, followed by a Sunday roast and an evening in Lowoods Club, it promises to be one of those Good Days. Yeah!
5-41am.
I start to consider breakfast. Maybe I値l put three of those thick, seasoned, prize winning, Crawshaws sausages in the pan. I値l take a shower, then add a couple of rashers of smoked bacon, an egg, and perhaps a few mushrooms. I値l skip the orange juice. Got to watch those damned calories! While the breakfast is cooking I値l make a pot of filter coffee. Mmmmm, that sounds just about right. Yeah!
5-42am.
As the sun begins rise over Stocksbridge the first rays, somewhat like a scene from The Raiders of the lost Ark, annoyingly illuminate a run of varnish on the freshly hung bedroom door. I must get round to sorting that out, but not today. No definitely not today. Today I have a tightly packed agenda of good times planned. The ugly run on the door would patiently wait for a more suitable day for maintenance.
5-45am.
Suddenly the serenity of the bedroom is shattered by a loud, insistent, beeping alarm. The sort of noise that would send shivers down the spines of nuclear power station workers. With a speed that would put the Sundance Kid to shame my finger slams down on the snooze button of the digital alarm clock.
5-46am.
A horrible cloying, nagging doubt, which started sixty seconds ago somewhere below my knees and that has finally arrived, uninvited, in my brain is in danger of blowing my plans for the day out of the water. Have I just forgotten to reset my alarm or is it really not my day off?
5-47am.
Relief. I have convinced myself that it is without any shadow of a doubt my day off. That痴 okay then. Maybe I値l have some beans with breakfast. After all, I知 forgoing the orange juice!
5-50am.
Red Alert! Klingons off the starboard bow? No it痴 that damned alarm again! Two beeps and it is off. God I知 fast!
5-55am.
The tune from the evil empire from Star Wars is coming from my mobile phone. Oh No. That means only one thing. Someone from the paper-mill is trying to contact me. Barney, the night shift guy asks me if I知 up and about. This is my failsafe final alarm. His call dispels any lingering hope that this is my day off. On the contrary, I知 on twelve-hour days.
5-59am.
While getting dressed I have woken her. She too has noticed the varnish run on the new door. I assure her that I値l look at it when I return.
Oh well.
6-00am.