CAVALMONELLA

       Now  once there was a beaterman, I think his name was Bob

I`ve only seen him once or twice in eight years on the job

Some people call him "Exocet"---He`s rarely to be seen

You never know when he`s coming but can sure tell when he`s been

We really shouldn`t jest because he is a poorly fella

he`s got a quite unique disease, its called Cavalmonella

It`s symptons are predictable----a runny nose and cough

It tends to strike a week before he has his Eight Days Off

There`s no way he could come to work---no-one could be sicker

He`s got a season ticket for the chemist on the Wicker

He can`t come out on rainy days--or if it is too sunny

Or if the pollen counts` too high--it really isn`t funny

He went to see a specialist who told him to stop smoking

He tried to join the Westfield Scheme but they thought he was joking

He hobbles down across the yard when he comes to get his wages

And everyone avoids him in case it is contagious

He went to see the doctor--all doubled up in pain

The lady on reception said "Old Quasi`s back again"

The doc said "Whats` the matter--and don`t give me no flannel"

"I`ve a nasty case of dandruff so put me on the panel"

I`ve heard he`s got a doner card but listen to me pal

I`d rather croak than have an organ out of Bob Caval

So lets send him a get well card--we really shouldn`t scoff

The only time he`s really sick is when they sign him off

                            P.C.93