Headaches
 
Joe had been battling headaches for years, but lately they had gotten much worse, so he decided he just had to see a doctor.
"The good news is I can cure your headaches," said the doctor. "The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."
 
Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.
When he left the hospital he was headache free for the first time in over 20 years, but he felt as if he was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street, Joe realized he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.
He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need, a new suit," and went in.

 
The elderly tailor eyed him quickly and said, "Let's see, you're a size 44 long."
 
Joe laughed and said, "That's right, how did you know?"
 
"Been in the business 60 years!" the tailor said.
Joe tried on the suit. It fit perfectly.

 
As Joe admired himself in the mirror the tailor asked, "How about a new shirt?"
 
Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure." 
"Let's see, 16-and-a half neck, 34 sleeve," said the tailor.
 
Joe was surprised. "How did you know?"
 
"Been in the business 60 years." The shirt fit perfectly.
As Joe looked at himself in the mirror, the tailor said, "You could use new shoes." 
Since Joe was on a roll, he said "sure."
The man eyed Joe's feet and said, "9-1/2E." Joe was astonished. "That's right. How did you know?"
 
"Been in the business 60 years."
 
Joe tried on the shoes and they also fit perfectly. As Joe walked comfortably around the shop, the salesman asked, "How about new underwear?

"Joe thought for a second and said, "why not."
 
The man stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see, size 36."
 
"Finally, I've got you!" Joe laughed. "I've worn size 32 since I was 18 years old."
 
The tailor shook his head. "You can't wear a size 32. Size 32 underwear is too small and would force your testicles to press against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."