My Gemini Vans
~ The FeralVan '97 ~ Page Two ~
Holden TD Gemini van built 04/78
VGS-425
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| Dave's Automotive Anomalies My Gemini Vans ~ The FeralVan '97 ~ Page Two ~ Holden TD Gemini van built 04/78 VGS-425 |
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| Back to my homepage | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Modifications: | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| The FeralVan '97 underwent some changes over the course of its life. I think the earliest change I made was to the steering wheel, which I replaced in the first week with a 13" Momo Shuttle I had been paying off of lay-by for some weeks before I even bought the car. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Down the track, a new set of wheels were in order, so off came the 13" stockies, and on went a set of 14" Holden Camira stocks with 186/60 tyres. It didn't matter that the wheels were the wrong offset, nor that I had to use spacers for them to fit correctly. I could have . One spacer failed in the first week, but I'd been on nothing but metropolitan roads, so I took it back and spewed at them. They replaced it for me, and I didn't have a peep of trouble from them ever again - I even pummelled that thing over some severely corrugated Yorkes backroads, and got air a couple of times. Perhaps I was lucky - I've since heard that spacers are quite sketchy. Many people thought they were Commodore Police rims, which of course do not fit. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| They weren't the last set of wheels that the FeralVan wore. When I got a better-paying job than the traineeship I was on, I bought myself a set of 14" Nissan Exa rims. They fitted quite well, and despite being for designed for front-wheel-drive applications, they filled out the guards pretty good too. The main reason I got them was that they closely resembled VL Calais rims, and a few people asked me if they were. They were polished up and looked OK for their day. Over time, I put both 195 and 205s on the car. The best tyres I ever had on the FeralVan was a set of Bridgestone G-grids. They looked a treat and lasted for ages! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Of course, I got the springs chopped at one stage, but I really wanted to do it right. So I trundled off to a Pedders shop and asked for a quote. To my ire, they quoted me $1400, and that was BEFORE springs and shocks, which I originally asked for. They thought there were too many problems to bother putting the parts in, I guess. So I went to Just Gemini Spares and asked Steve to get me a set of Pedders springs and shocks. He did, and the car handled just as good as it ever did - albeit this time legally! No chopped springs, no seized old shocks. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I guess the bushes probably needed an overhaul, but I knew nothing of the things back then. I know now that overhauling the rubbers should be the first thing anybody does to a Gemini - more often than not, they're still the originals! But even then, I can't see how it would have added up to $300, let alone $1400. Crazy. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| When I was still going to Gemispares, I got them to shave and rebuild the head. They did, and the car went harder. However, a few months later, the timing chain tensioner went. By this stage, I was frequently the opposition, Just Gemini Spares. Steve reckoned that Gemispares had taken too much off, which caused slackness in the chain. Well, whether it was Gemispares or if it was just fucked from old age, I had a problem - an expensive problem. It turned out that Steve had a second hand G180Z come in - that's an 1800cc version of the Gemini 161Z, but unfortunately it was only sold in the Holden Rodeo ute here. Anyway, it's a bolt-in swap - exhaust, intake, the whole lot. So put in it was, and the car went harder than ever. Of course, by this stage, I'd put in a 2" exhaust anyway - basically a mandatory modification for any Gemini I reckon. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| One really cool modification I managed to get done was a factory-style tachometer. I was sick of the shitty one that was in the car when I bought it - it was an all-purpose cheapy that could read up to 10,000rpm and had an adjustable redline needle. Gemispares knew how to do the tacho - they fabricated it into an existing instrument binnacle, so it was a bolt-in swap. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Defect!!! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I went to my mate Cane Toad's house one night. The Cane Toad was another guy who's CB call sign followed him into the real world. Anyway, Cane Toad's house was burnout central, and when I rocked up, several burnouts had been done; and filmed. Of course, the neighbours complained as neighbours do. The decision was made to not give a shit about the neighbours and do some more burnouts. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I was bolting a stocky - the bent one I smashed into the kerb - when the Police arrived. I was doing up the nuts, then started undoing them in the same motion; frantically I might add. The Police immediately accused me of smashing it into the kerb right then, which of course wasn't true. An acquaintance who was present had a VL Commodore with rubber up the side of it - he'd done some burnouts and didn't have his P-plates up. But he got away with it. Damien, this little dude with a bizarre 1985 Datsun 1200 ute got away with it. Everybody seemed to get off scot-free, except me. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| above: The FeralVan '97 looking resplendent in red, with mural, Nissan Exa rims and my little sister Lisa about to have her first driving lesson. Oh yeah, and a bloody yellow 'defect' sticker on the windscreen. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I was defected for a wobbly drivers seat and frayed seatbelts. I was fucking spewing, because stuff like that usually means that the car has to go to Transport SA's depot at Regency Park, and 'Regency' striked dread into the heart of every South Australian modified car owner. It is the deathknell of many a car, both fine and otherwise. I guess we can't complain; we don't have the mandatory yearly inspections like the do in New South Wales, but I was spewing all the same. The FeralVan would never make it through Regency without about $3000 work. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Initially, the angry copper wanted to defect me for the lack of a rubber on my accelerator pedal. I had to stand up for myself there, and told him that no Geminis had rubbers on the accelerators, so if he defected me, it would be impossible to fix. Besides, if it's factory-fitted, he can't defect me for it anyway! He also threatened to defect my Momo, as it is a non-original steering wheel on a post-1970 vehicle. But he didn't. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I went to the local cop station to try to ask for approval to drive the car to and from work until the defect is lifted. I was given a week by the Constable, but he also said that he'd lift the defect for me; a remarkable turn of events. I took the car to Just Geminis and asked them to do the work. The floorpan had large crack in it from the ill-fitting sports seat, so they were welded up. The fraying on the seat belts was tackled with, of all things, a cigarette lighter and a razor. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Well, if that's not a fucking shonky fix, I don't know what is. The seat still wobbled, due to problems internal, and the seatbelts looked like frayed seatbelts that had been attacked by a lighter and razor. Needless to say, the Constable was not happy, but gave me another week when I asked if I could sort it out properly. I bought another seat from Just Geminis, this time a stock one, and bought some brand-new seat belts from a trim shop in town. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I showed the now non-shonky fix to the Constable, pointing out the seat's newfound stability, but he was too busy rubbing the seatbelts sexually, and grinning like a loony. He was happy, I was happy, and I'll never forget what he did for me. He saved me paying either $3000 in repairs, or having to buy a new car. Constable Lorince, you're a fucking champion. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Memories: | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| The numberplate of the FeralVan was a point of mirth; VGS-425 stood for Very Good Skunk 4 $25 - because any South Aussie will tell you (well, some will anyway), a jay-bag of skunk will set you back $25. I was never a dealer, but it was a cool way to remember the number, and a good way to break the ice when I was chatting to people. Of course, I told the oldies that it was Very Good Sex, which didn't impress them, but they'd be less impressed with the other version. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| I went to Prides Business College as a Government Trainee. Unlike many traineeships, where the pupils attend regular TAFE classes, we had a specific trainee class. It was like being in Primary School again - we had one teacher all day. We went on Mondays and Tuesdays, and it was a great way to unwind after a hectic weekend! We seriously ran amok during those classes - we did the work and all but one person passed, but we gave the teacher hell. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| On Monday afternoons, we'd have typing, and on Tuesday afternoons, we'd learn how to use computers. The curriculum was designed for people who have never wielded a PC in anger before, and most of us in the class knew how to do the complex stuff like open a Word document, save an Excel spreadsheet or Paste text. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| So every lunch time, we'd get whacked. Initially, it was the summer months and we'd get stoned down at the Botanical Gardens if we had the time (like if we were supposed to be in the library studying), but more often than not, we'd go up to the roof top of the John Martin's Car Park. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| One day, myself and Wally (fellow Pridester and a wally of Wallyish proportions) disembarked from the lift and looked to the left to head to our usual lunch and session spot. Our heads turned in unison to see two uniformed Police officers coming up and out of the stairs. Without skipping a beat, we walked straight ahead and down into the depths of the car park. Finally a safe distance away, we looked to see where they had gone. Straight around the corner to our spot. Fortunately, nobody was there yet, as the rest of the crew were still out buying their lunches. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Somebody, presumabley a member of the public, had lagged on us. It was quite unnerving, as we were always dressed in office gear - shirts and ties for the guys and office-chick stuff for the girls - we never thought anybody would suspect a thing. Obviously now, that spot was tainted. From then on, the FeralVan, parked deep within the car park, would serve as our session headquarters. Each week it was decked with "the comfy stuff" and up to six people sat back and chilled and smoked up a big session. Who would suspect such a thing in a panelvan with a mural? | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| The FeralVan was no ball-tearer, but at the same time, it wasn't too much of a slouch either, especially once it was fitted with the 1800cc engine. One night, a whole bunch of us were heading away to Victor Harbor. We pulled up on South Road, three abreast. There was myself, Whiskey in his TD coupe and Anthony in his TD sedan. We had a drag, and I'm proud to say that the FeralVan won. However, it was packing 200cc more than the others, and extractors. Whiskey's coupe came a close second, and that didn't have a trick exhaust or anything. Ant's sedan was third, but again, he couldn't have been more than a car length behind when we slacked off. It was pretty cool. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Another cool moment happened when we went away to Carrickalinga. We were staying at the holiday shack of a friend, Toby. Toby had a brief affair with a TD coupe, but found he couldn't fit and 18" monitor properly in the boot. Or rather, he couldn't and not be gripped by the fear that it would fall through the floor! My friend Ross, who owned a TG sedan with a twin cam, had bought a TD wagon as a run around. We had Anthony's TD sedan, and my TD van. A complete set! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| left: Many of my mates have owned Geminis. Here's my van with Shane's fawn TG sedan, Ross' blue TG sedan (he also owned the red wagon below) and Whiskey's hand can be seen sticking out of his TD coupe. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| above: A complete collection of TD Geminis! From left, Toby's coupe, Ant's sedan, my panelvan and Ross' wagon. Toby's affair with the coupe was brief and Whiskey had sold his; this was the only time we had the collection in one place at one time. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| All good things must come to an end, however. I was driving the FeralVan in the city one day when a loud bang occurred. The thrust bearings had let go and the car was left without a clutch. I drove it to a carpark and went to work. Then I drove home with no clutch, having to key-start it in first at every set of lights. Not to worry, I did put an apologetic sign in the rear window! I figured that pouring more money into the thing probably wasn't the best thing I could do, as the body would need a lot of work, and probably a donor car, to get to any sort of decent standard. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| I knew the FeralVan was pretty far gone though - the rear floorpan under the fuel tank was more air than metal, and the footwells were shot as well - not to mention the mandatory Gemini rust either side of the engine bay near the tops of the quarter panels. I had come across a Gemini van, a neat blue one, covered in signwriting for the workshop that owned it. I'd offered to buy the car then, but didn't actually have the money. Thankfully, I was told to write down the number on the side and give them a call in a few months. I did that, and that's how I came across my second van. Many thanks to my late Grandmother, who left me $2000 when she died. Without it, I would have been bussing it for a long time. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| above: This wasn't the most joyous day of my life. FeralVan was stripped of anything of worth - Pedders suspension, tacho, Momo wheel, bumper, seats and the Li'l Malibu panels, which I still have. I never passed my Gold Boomerang test at Cub Scouts, and am subsequently very bad at tying knots - the car moved about a few times before me and Ross got it strapped down tight. You can clearly see the holes cut for the bubble windows that never eventuated (thankfully). I'm sure towing this much weight is illegal. Don't try it at home. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| ~ on to FeralVan 2000 ~ | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||