OCTOBER 2002

October 2
I was talking to 2 angels. They were in the form of Matt Damon and Ben Affleck (GO Dogma!!! One of the best films!). I was dead and didn't like the idea very much. And I didn't like the idea of never knowing the truth about anything. So they had me driving around with my mother so that she could tell me all the good points to it. But then she started driving too fast. I was scared but she wouldn't slow down. I didn't want to 'die' further. Matt and Ben told me to calm down that there was nothing to worry about. We then crashed. It was much more serious in the dream. I actually have another one to put up in a minute. Why do I keep dreaming mean things about my mother? At least I was in heaven in my dream and not hell.
#2: I was walking through S***** Village with Catherine and Kate. We were discussing Nicole Gilbert. I was wondering how she was going and how her children were. Catherine told me: “Well they are moving (looks at watch) to-day. With Johns allergies and everything they thought that it was best that they just moved.” I replied aghast: “What? She’s taking him with her? Why? So that when they break up he gets everything?” We stopped at one of the benches in the ‘hall’. I stood facing it with my foot raised on it. The mall was curiously deserted. Then one guy wearing a really nice, light gray, single breast Armani suit, with a navy blue shirt and yellow tie walked by. No only was he wearing a perfect suit but he had a decent face on him too (sort of like the guy from Cash Converters). I said just as he finished passing so that I could pretend that he wasn’t meant to hear: “Now that is a perfect suit.” He turned his head and displayed the greatest smile. Catherine retorted: “His body wasn’t that bad either.” I agreed and added: “Neither was his face. All in all great to look at.” Then another guy who wasn’t ugly, but not attractive walked passed. He had a stoop and was wearing mustard coloured pants that weren’t quite right and a loose fitting dark blue shirt. He reminded me of David (Literature) because he had that awkward half smile that is synonymous with him. When he had gone past (and it was obvious he was hoping for a compliment too) Catherine said: “Poor Tristan. Always trying to be cool.” Apparently it was the funniest thing that Kate and I had ever heard. As Catherine walked to the supermarket we couldn’t sop laughing. Kate said: “Tristan is always funny.” It was after the mall and Kate and I went to visit Nicole. We were in a dilapidated house. I found Nicole sitting at the table looking destitute. I asked her where her child was and she pointed to under the table, but all I could see was a video camera. I sat down at the table and Kate came in. Nicole said that she was going to the shop to get something but the moment that we heard the car we knew that she was not coming back. We started to get worried about her children. Kate asked where they were and I pointed to the door. I saw through a crack a huge, monstrous creature that was deprived of love. We knew that all the poor thing wanted was someone to hold it but Nicole never had. We also knew that it would take some time of removing the violent streak from the creature before we could either.

October 3
The Melbourne of this dream is not the actual physical layout of Melbourne. In fact it is the layout that I always have for Melbourne but as I said, it is not. Kate and I went to Melbourne on the 6pm train, which would get us there at 8pm. We decided to go shopping at a mall that was miles out of the city center. When we got there on our motorcycles we separated. Within five minutes I was wondering how we were going to get back before the train left because the last train for the day was at 9pm. I had to get back for M. I couldn’t find Kate and started riding in, but I crashed up my bike. I went to the nearest house for assistance and they offered me a room for the night. I said no but asked if I could change in it. I was there for thirty minutes when Kate rang me on my mobile and asked where I was. When I told her she said: “That is a shame. If you were here I was going to buy you a $340 gift!” I just shrugged my shoulders. I told he that I would meet her at the station. I began to stuff things in my bag from around the room. I wanted to only steal cold things. Yes, frozen things. But I got interrupted. I took off outside and was walking along the road when I came to a rest area. Luke and Moira were camping there. They were on a trip back and forwards to Melbourne for the second time. Suddenly my dog popped up and began chasing their dog and a duck. But she would not attack them. Suddenly there was a little girl at the rest area asking who owned the rotten fruit. Luke said it was theirs from their last trip and that she could have it. She got really excited. I was back on my bike again and returned to the house where I continued to steal things and left. But this time I walked to the train station. I was paranoid about walking through the city because I thought that people were going to pick on me. When I got there Kate was waiting and said that the train did not leave until 9:30pm so we were alright. But I was sure that we were going to miss it.

October 6
It is a slightly creepy dream but I am not sure if it was one of 'those' dreams. It sure involved waking up to a brilliant orgasm. But there was sooo much more to it. I was talking to some guy who we will call Kick (got Kick Gurry in mind at the moment for some reason). This guy I have seen several times but not really thought much of except the stupid ads that he is in. Like the Pryda home ad where heis chatting up some girl and asks her home. She saysd yes until she finds out it isn't a pryda home. Sound like a good ad? Would be if the acting was better. NEWAZY, he is the guy in it. I was going away on holidays somewhere. The atmosphere was all, grey. Best way to describe it. We were kissing because he didn't want me to leave. I was getting a little randy so I started feeling him up. He wasn't exactly generously endowed but I thought: "I don't care. A Perfect fit for me." But as we were starting to get all hot and bothered his family walked in. His mother, sister and aunt. They did not approve of us so we had to stop. But even without any actual intercourse I was very, very close to climax. He was just a brilliant at foreplay. He knew how much I wanted him so he said to his family: "I'll be back in a minute. I have to spend some time with her." He showed me into the kitchen where he placed his hand on the back of my neck and kissed me. Best kiss that I ever had. And we finished what we had started infront of the window. I know that it doesn't sound special. But there was something to this dream that was beyond what actualy happened. I also had another dream that I will add in a minute in a seperate entry.
#2I was wandering around Lansell Plaza with some guy I don't recognize. I was having a bit of a 'tantrum' (but not angry) and kicked a hole in the wall. I noticed that behind the wall was a secret colorful area with a number 1 and a button. I climbed in and found out that it was my destiny to complete this game. I grabbed the key that was sitting on the hill and ran out. I went to the nearest intact wll and kicked it until I could get in where I found another little world with more clues and the number 2, but a button instead of a key. I kept going until I got to the one with the keyhole. Here is where the dream ended. If I am interpreting this in a spiritual or psychological way I dare say that it means that my destiny is to play this life that I have been given and that I haven't come to the end, just a new stage. It would be more interesting if it was spiritual because that means that there is some good change that is in store for me. I feel like writing in my journal but this damned computer doesn't log out until the computer is turned off..... Oooooh, Pacifier. Memories with the drummer... Mmmmmmmmm

October 7
I was in a magick shop looking at the jewlry. There was one ring that appealed to me, but there was something strange about it. I looked closer and noticed that it began morphing into a completely different look. It started as a large round bluey gem that slowly turned into a smalled onyx with a decorative floral setting then into a dragon like setting with a pink gem. It slowly went back into the first setting. I looked at the owner and he said: "If you buy that ring it will be your doom." I decided that I was going to buy it anyway because it was such a nice ring.

October 8
I decided to buy a house. One house on S******** Street across and down from where I used to live was for sale. In my dream Kate used to live in that house. It was old and dilapidated. But it didn’t need much work. I decided to have a look while the current renting tenants were in there. One girl was the fat girl from my literature class but with black hair. I started at the outside and it was like an old church with giant poles (???) around the entrance. When we went inside the kitchen was just peeling paint and old 50’s style décor. We decided to look at the bedrooms despite the fact that there was someone asleep in one. There was three bedrooms but I only looked at 2. They came off the living room. When I opened the door to the first I saw that it was sunken. Not the normal 2 or three steps, but ten steep ones. But I thought it would be okay if the next one was the same. I also noticed that the walls were a nice blue. The next bedroom was just the same except that it had access to the bathroom. I decided to buy it.

October 11
I was in some QLD country town with my family, but I hadn’t been invited. I really can’t say why I actually turned up. It wasn’t as revenge or because I was upset. So I am not sure. But then I was lying in some room looking out the window at a medieval looking turret. My mother said: “It looks so much like the desert doesn’t it!” I said that I couldn’t see anything but the tower. After that is when I ‘learn’ that they are there so that my father can learn construction. But I am not so sure that I believe them. I notice that the castle (I am outside now) is in the process of being built. I start walking and see that my mother and father are talking. My father walks away and Mum bursts into tears. I know exactly what has happened. I go up to her to comfort her but she doesn’t want any part of me. Finally she turns and lets me hug her but shes not comfortable. I said: “You knew that it was coming.” I knew she did and everyone knew that eventually they would get a divorce. She had made me Caramel Biscuit and I was on my way home. I saw a billboard that displayed Mum’s online diary (at DD). It had a list of things for the day that she regrets and one of them was ‘getting all emotional with Samantha’. She had hated me being the one that she had talked to because she didn’t like me.

October 16
I dreamt that I was at the uni and in the elevator. Suddenly this stunny guy (who looks like a guy called Shane that liked Envii) bursts through the roof scaring the shit out of everyone! I just burst out laughing. It turns out that he was doing this for me. I was pulling a prank. Though everyone was scared they were proud of me. I was actually doing something social (well, in a way). The stripper and I were talking and he outright rejected me because he didn't like sex before marriage. When he went away (you could see him walking over to the dry canal and climbing the wall covered with ivy for the remainder of the dream) Townsend came up and talked to me. He was wearing a band shirt (can't remember) and was hitting on me. But I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't even talk to him. Sounds familiar. When will I talk to him...???

October 17
In this dream Townsends family were in town. I have never met them, I haven't even talked to him. So this is all a dream.... I could see them all outside my living room window. I envisionged his mother as being an older (50ish-60ish) woman with short brown curly hair, obviously the daily roller type. And they were trying to stop Townsend and myself from being together. This is by far one of the most boring dreams that I have ever had. And it is all because I watch too much trashy tv. :o) Read some other earlier ones, they were by far the most interesting.

October 27
This is the second of 2 dreams to-day, but it goes in forst because it is the most recent. I was working for some office with a group of people that I have never seen in my waking life. The boss decided that it would be an idea to hire a handicapped person, for face value only. Only problem was when he arrived he took an instant facination with me. He began following me around the office. Then after about a month he went a little crazy. He would follow me home and started stealing my things. He was also carrying a knife- one of those nasty ones that you would see in rambo. He threatened to kill me. Myself and one of the other office employees ran into my office and locked the door, but he wasn't that handicapped. He removed the screws from the door and let himself in, raving and ranting about how I was his forever and that I had to love him aswell. The otehr girl ran out the door and I was left by myself with him. He didn't want to hurt me but he kept trying to grab me and the knife kept cutting into my hand. I could feel each slice like something rusty running through tin. Finally the boss came in and calmed him down. I escaped and went home. Next thing it is a few days later and I am an observor of the bosses interview with the handicapped man. He was firing him, but he couldn't send him to jail. I asked why not and they said because he was handicapped and didn't know what he was doing. I was sent on paid leave. It was a month later and I was lying on my couch (in a different house, and a different couch, but it was mine and I was sharing with some workmates who were at work) in my underwear and a blanket wrapped around me. I hear someone at the door and it scared me because I know it wouldn't be a flat mate. I grab my knife from under the couch and starts asking: "WHO IS IT?" but because I was crying so much the person coming in couldn't really hear me. I kept sobbing hysterically when a guy walked in with a box. He saw me and tried to calm me. He asked what I was doing there. He looked at a letter on the table and realized that he had been rented the wrong place. But he decided to wait until the others got home to come to some sort of agreement. I didn't care because I couldn't stop crying. My other dream is about Unwritten Law, so I will add that later. Too sick now.
#2I was watching Unwritten Law (UL) at Livid, but there was something wrong. I was watching from afar when there was a lock down. Everyone was stuck in the venue for 2 days because of some uninvited disease. Scott Russo (the singer) was beoming really narky so I had to calm him down. I informed him that he was meant to play here the next day anyway so all he had to do was sit down and sleep that night. I walked away to hit on Pat Kim (bass) but I overheard him telling someone that I had a fat arse. I was really upset and walked away. Now here is the problem with waiting all day to write down a dream. I forgot most of the details. I know that there was somethign to do with a pool, and I forgot. Dammit.

October 30
This was pretty much a silent dream. There was talking but I heard none of it though I knew what they were saying. It was a dark and dreary dream/ Raining, cold and all round horror ambience. It was like some time in the future when everything has already gone wrong, but it wasn't. It was now. The devil had risen and created major havoc. He had not rissen literally. He had given his powers to a school boy who was the head of his school hockey team, and taken most of them into his little cult. They went out destroying things. I on the other hand was in a group of rebels who were training to save the world from this evil that was spreading- mind you no one knew it was these boys. Especially because they had the power to turn people into demons. We were doing a commando course well above the ground. THere were a lot of people freaking out about it, but not me. I was calm about everything because I knew there was no way of falling, we were attatched to the ropes. Nestor (my lit teacher) was also in this commando group. He had something against me bbut it didn't get in the way of our training. Next thing I know I am watching the boys again. One of them has gone power hungry and has pleaded with the devil to give him the powers instead of his friend. The devil agreed because he loved greed. The leader came to talk to the boy before his powers were full so he sat behind the door. After a little struggle he had his powers and the first boy went and asked the devil for his powers back, but the devil refused. So the boy returned. He was up for a fight. He was going to kill the second boy. I oculd see the second boy in the room waiting for the first to come back. He was playing with his powers, conjuring up huge enerygy balls and dragging them around the room so that the appearance would change into that of an old dilapidated tree/castle inside of a tree. The first boy opened the door and the second let fly with a transforming ball, but the first had a baby in his arms and it turned the baby into a little ugly demon. M woke me up then. But there is something that is occuing more and more in my dreams. No so much in my dreams but during my dreams. I am by no means able to control what is happening, if I could I would have stopped him from hitting the baby. But I can think during my dreams. From half way through I was thinking that I did not want to know what was going to happen and did not want to watch because no good could come of it. I was scared. I kept wanting to close my eyes, but I was dreaming so I could not. Another time that this happened was in the skinless freak dream. I as the dreamer not as the subject was thinking of all the ways that it was possible for her to have no skin. I was trying to see if there was a logical way. But then I accepted that it was a dream so anything was logical. And I kept wondering what was going to happen next. This is happening a lot. It is putting me as an outsider to my dreams. This is frightening because someone once told me that my dreams were psychic. Not all of them were literal. And it was a psychic that told me this- and pretty much everythign that she told me came true. Well if I am psychic that means the majority of my dreams are coming from a differnt source to my brain and that I am an outsider. It is like watching a television show created only for me to decipher. I know that if I dream of a flood within the next few days I am going to have a fight with the main protagonist in my dream. I'm going to have to learn to decipher the rest properly. I am going to copy and paste this last bit (not the dream) into my diary. Saves me having to write it twice. And to who ever is on my notify list- I LOVE YOU! I had no idea that people actually read this.

October 31
I was out at Lansell Plaza with Envii and M. I saw that there was a competition on. Initially you had to select a bag of money on the ground and write you name beside it. I chose one with $1000. There were ones with more but I felt like it was the right one. I did a little shopping with Envii and M. Finally I went back to the money and it was starting. What we had to do was go on a shopping spree through the plaza using the money and a special card to prove that it was for the competition. You only got to spend a thousand dollars (some girl had taken my spot and I got more than a thousand dollars) and the aim was to make the Teagan’s (he was in my year 7 level then went to private school. I have not thought about him in eons) very happy. The person whose purchases made them the happiest won. I have no idea what the prize was. I was out side of the plaza for a purchase (I don’t know of what) and I saw that there was a big house on a hill behind it. I felt something creepy eminating from it. Another competition entrant told me that the family had moved out of there long ago. I won the competition. I don’t know how. I don’t know what I got. Hmmmmm.