Flowers of Nimloth
Chapter 19: Questions Under the Stars
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The meal passed quickly, and the conversation was light as they all pushed thoughts of Sauron from their minds and focused on what they were celebrating: Isildur�s healing and Lienilde�s dedication to his care. The men shared stories of the shipyard, Lienilde told a few light-hearted tales from her work, and they all spoke of what they would plant in their gardens now that spring was arriving. Sauron�s work, and indeed even Isildur�s healing, was not mentioned. For even though they were celebrating his healing and that the event had brought them all much happiness, thinking of his recovery also brought to mind the terrible events that had brought about his injuries, and all that had happened since. Thus they focused on other things, and it was simply an enjoyable dinner with Isildur�s family. Though Lienilde was so focused on their conversation, she did not notice that she and Isildur did most of the talking.
After dinner, Lienilde found herself seated with Amandil and his grandsons in the front room, while Elendil finished cleaning up in the kitchen. Their after-dinner conversation retained the happy mood of the meal, and while Lienilde was telling a story of Failon�s latest exploits, a knock sounded on the door. Amandil rose to answer it, and Lienilde turned in her seat to see a middle-aged man with blond hair standing in the doorway.
"Greetings, Nolvo," Amandil welcomed the man. "Please come in, though we cannot speak long, for we have a guest tonight."
Nolvo peeked through the doorway, and seeing Lienilde he said, "Oh, I did not mean to interrupt--"
"It is fine," Lienilde answered, smiling at the man. "I was planning on leaving soon anyways."
"Nolvo and I shall go to the back room, so we will not disturb the rest of you," Amandil said.
But as Amandil stepped aside to let Nolvo enter, the guest suddenly noticed Isildur sitting not far from Lienilde. "Isildur!" Nolvo exclaimed. "I did not realize that you were well!"
Isildur grinned, but before he could answer, Amandil said, "Ah yes, and it is quite the interesting story. Isildur, why don�t you come with us and tell it?" Then turning to Lienilde, he added, "He will just be a moment."
"Of course," Lienilde answered, as Isildur rose and followed the men into the back room. She glanced over at Anarion, and he gave her a brief smile but said nothing as the conversation died in an awkward silence. She had been chatting with his family all night, and there was little left to say. Looking back over the past few months, she realized that she had spent little time alone with Anarion: the dance they shared at Ardil�s wedding was the most memorable, and there was the time that he had visited her and her family when she was ill. But most of the time they had spent together had been in the presence of Anarion�s other family members.
Just as she was trying to think of something to say to break the silence, Anarion spoke instead: "Lienilde, I do not believe we have had a chance to truly thank you for everything you have done for my brother."
"But I--"
Anarion held up a hand and she fell silent again. "Do not try to say you were just doing your job," he said with a slight smile. Lienilde�s eyes widened slightly, for he had correctly guessed what she would say. "You are too predictable," he continued in jest, but the playful smile was soon replaced by a more thoughtful one as he went on. "You have been more than just a healer to him, and to us -- you are a part of our family now."
Lienilde smiled, glad to hear his words. For indeed, she did feel like a part of the family. She had spent much time with these four men as of late. She had seen their pain and they had seen hers, they had shared their thoughts and fears, and she had rejoiced with them when Isildur was healed. "I am pleased to hear that," she finally replied.
Anarion returned her smile. "Lienilde, I am happy for you--"
Before he could continue, Isildur returned to the room and Anarion fell silent. Lienilde turned to see what had interrupted Anarion and smiled as Isildur took his seat next to her. Quickly forgetting what Anarion had been saying, she said to Isildur, "Well, that was quick."
"Yes," Isildur answered, "Nolvo is a close confidant of our family, and he already knew most of the tale. I only had to tell him of the ending."
"I see," Lienilde replied. The conversation then fell into nervous small talk -- for while the three did not feel comfortable sitting in silence, they were also worried that Nolvo had brought more ill tidings. However, it was not long before Amandil and Nolvo returned to the front room. Nolvo gave the young adults a cursory goodbye on his way out, and Amandil returned to his seat.
"Did Nolvo bring any news?" Anarion asked his grandfather after the guest had left.
"No, nothing that I did not already know," the older man answered. "I told him more than he told me."
"That is good, I suppose," Anarion answered. Elendil then joined them in the front room, and after a few more moments of conversation -- for they seemed to be running out of topics by the night�s end -- Lienilde decided it was time for her leave.
"Thank you for the wonderful dinner," she told Elendil as she prepared to depart. "It was much appreciated."
"You are welcome," he replied. "And please remember that you are welcome in our home at any time."
"Thank you," she repeated, and as she spoke she stole a glance at Amandil, who had said little during the night. He simply smiled at her, and there was a sparkle in the old man�s eye that rather surprised Lienilde. Yet she had little time to think of it, for Isildur soon spoke up:
"Would you care for an escort home again?" he asked.
"Of course," she answered, and with one last smile towards the rest of his family, they turned and left the house.
"I am glad you were able to join us," Isildur said as they began the walk to her home.
"As am I," she replied. "I am happy that I did not have to work as late this evening as I have had to in the past." Lienilde then felt Isildur�s hand reach for her own. Their fingers entwined, and Lienilde trembled slightly at their touch. They walked a few moments in silence, hand in hand, until finally she said, "These last few days have been so... unreal to me."
"In what way?" Isildur asked.
"It still seems so odd to see you out of bed, and I am so happy that you are well. I had begun to think--"
"Hush," he replied softly, a smile on his lips. "Let us have just one evening of happy conversation."
Lienilde also smiled. "Of course. Though I must admit, I am still very proud of you for what you did -- I still cannot fathom how you found the courage!"
"Oh, Lienilde," he replied, "any fool with a sword could have done what I did. It is really I that should be admiring you -- I do not know how you have the strength to deal with the ill every day."
Lienilde grinned at his flattery. "Thank you," she answered, not sure of what else to say. With that, they fell into a comfortable silence as they continued to walk, each enjoying the views of quiet marketplace under the stars on a clear night. Suddenly Lienilde realized that they were not taking her normal path back to her house. She had been simply walking, letting Isildur lead, and had not noticed until now that they were veering toward the edge of the marketplace, while Lienilde normally cut through the middle. Indeed, she had led him down her normal track the last time he had walked her home, so he knew the way to her house. "Where are we going?" she finally asked.
"Ah, I am surprised it took you so long to notice," her escort answered. "It is still early, and I thought you might enjoy a detour to the beach, to see the stars over the sea."
"I would enjoy that," she said with a squeeze to his hand. They then turned and headed directly for the shoreline, saying nothing. They had conversed all evening, and now they both felt content to walk in silence under Elbereth�s stars. When they neared the shore, Isildur led her not to the sandy beach, but to a grassy hill overlooking the sea. They then took a seat in the grass and sat in silence for a moment, staring at the clear night sky. However, their hands were not so content and soon wandered and found each other once again.
Finally, Isildur turned toward her and spoke. "I have missed you these past two days."
"As have I," she replied with a smile. "While I am certainly happy that you are well, I had rather missed our daily visits."
"Lienilde," he continued, nervously rubbing his thumb up and down her hand, "I cannot help but feel that Eru has brought us together for a purpose. Your face was truly a light for me in this dark winter, and your visits encouraged me in a way I never would have predicted."
Lienilde�s cheeks warmed at his flattery. She was surprised at the personal turn this conversation was taking, and could feel his nervousness at opening up to her, yet somehow she found the words to express her thoughts as well: "I felt the same way, ever since the day we first met. At the time, I could not explain why I was so drawn to help you, but I believe now that the Valar -- or perhaps Eru himself -- formed that bond between us, so that you would receive all the care you needed until the day Nimloth�s descendent opened its first leaf."
"But yet the leaf has opened, and the bond is still there, is it not?" he answered. She simply smiled and nodded. "Lienilde," he continued, rather quickly, "I love you, and I want to know, will you be my wife?"
Lienilde�s heart leapt at his words. Even though she had hardly been able to admit it to herself, this was a desire that had long lain secret within her. Yet even though her heart longed to say "yes", her mind had one last question, which she found herself speaking before she had fully thought it through: "But Isildur, I--" she saw his face fall at her first words, and she immediately squeezed his hand to reassure him and continued, "I do love you, it�s just that -- well, how do we know that our feelings are not simply brought on from being healer and patient? How will we feel tomorrow, a year from now, a decade from now?"
"Is that your only worry?" Isildur answered, a smile forming at the corners of his mouth. Lienilde wondered at his sudden confidence -- she had thought it a rather important question to consider, for after all, their relationship had been one of healer and patient for four months, up until just two days ago.
"I -- I suppose so," she answered.
"Then let me ask you this," he replied, and Lienilde began to wonder if he had already considered the question himself. But surely he had -- surely he had not simply asked her hand in marriage on a whim! But then again, he nearly killed himself on a whim in Armenelos, she thought. But Isildur continued before she could dwell on her thoughts any further: "How did you react, how did you feel when I was healed, and afterwards? How does that compare to when another of your patients are healed?"
"Well, you can hardly compare the two--" she began, but suddenly realized where his question was leading. She knew the answer he wanted to hear, and she smiled as she realized that that was the answer she was going to tell him. However, she decided to play along first, for this seemed as good of time as any to voice her thoughts on the matter. "For one, none of my other patients risked their lives in such a heroic act!" Isildur smiled at her compliment, as she knew he would. "But I was overly happy when you were healed, more so than any other patient. And I have looked forward to seeing you again after you were healed. I cannot imagine my future without you." After a brief pause, she continued, "But what about you? Do you love me only because I was your healer?"
"Of course not!" he replied, though he did understand why she asked the question. She felt confident that she loved him not simply because he was her patient, and she wanted to make sure that he felt the same way. "That is one of the things I love about you, yes, but not the reason I love you."
"Then why do you love me?"
"If I could say why I love you, then would that not be a conditional love? If I say I love you because you are a healer, then would I still love you when you are at home with our children? If I say I love you for your beauty, then would I still love you when you are old and grey? I certainly enjoy those things -- and many more that I did not list -- but it is not why I love you. If I must give an answer, then I would say that I love you simply because of who you are."
Lienilde could not help but smile at his flattery, though she wondered if his speech had been rehearsed or if he was always so eloquent in such situations. Had he anticipated her question? In the end she decided that it did not matter, for she knew his words were true, and her heart soared to know that he thought that way of her.
"Lienilde," Isildur continued, "I know I have surprised you tonight and given you much to think about. You have not had the weeks confined to bed to reflect on your thoughts as I have, and I do not want you to answer until you are ready. I know that I am asking for a huge commitment, but I am confident that we are both prepared -- and willing -- to make it."
A commitment: Lienilde had never fallen in love before, but the one thing she had learned from watching her parents over the years was that a marriage needed both love and a conscious commitment to remain happy as time went on. I have already kept one commitment, she realized, to stay with him and help him until his body healed. And yes, I am ready to make another, one that will endure for the rest of our lives. At this thought, Lienilde smiled -- not the slightly embarrassed grin of hearing his compliments, but a genuinely happy smile, and Isildur could see the difference.
"I do believe you are correct," she answered. "I did not realize it until now, but that is what I really wanted to hear -- that you were not asking for my hand on a whim, but understood the commitment involved. You are a part of me now, and I truly cannot imagine my life without you. I do love you, and -- and I would be overjoyed to be your wife." Lienilde was almost surprised to find that although just a few short moments ago she was still unsure about saying those words, now she was happy and knew that she had made the right decision. She suddenly felt rather silly for her long hesitation and questions, though if she had stopped to think about it, she would have realized that her hesitation was simply brought on by the surprise of Isildur�s proposal, not because of any real doubt in her heart.
Isildur�s face also broke into a huge smile; clearly he had been nervous as to whether his answers would satisfy her. Suddenly he released her hand for the first time since their conversation began, and reached for a small leather wallet at his belt. Lienilde watched with curiosity as he emptied the contents of the bag into his hand then held them up for her to see: two unadorned silver rings rested in his palm, shining in the moonlight.
"I doubt many on this isle still remember," Isildur then said, "but the Eldar have a tradition of wearing silver rings during their betrothal, and then returning them at the wedding."
"I -- I don�t know what to say," Lienilde said, her voice hardly more than a whisper.
"You do not need to say anything," he replied. Lienilde then held out her hand and Isildur slipped the smaller of the two rings onto her finger. "A little loose," he muttered as he realized the ring was too large for her delicate fingers, not yet calloused with years of labor.
"It is all right; my father can fix it at the smithy," she replied. Isildur then placed the other ring on his own finger, then took her hand once more -- the hand which now bore the slender silver ring. He pulled her close and gave her a quick kiss, then leaned back and simply gazed at her. Nothing more needed to be said at the moment.
Lienilde returned his stare, still trying to absorb all that had happened that night, and slightly surprised at the emotions that his kiss had sparked in her. She studied him more closely now -- even in the dim moonlight, she could still see all the features that she admired most about him: his broad shoulders, his strong jaw line, and his dark gray eyes, now glistening with happiness. The starlight shone on his sleek, bound hair, while a few wisps that had escaped from their tie floated in the breeze.
Suddenly, Lienilde�s face lit up with a grin, as a sparkle formed in her eye. Isildur�s eyebrows arched slightly in surprise, wondering at her thoughts. "Sometimes, Isildur," she said, "you are just too polite." Wrapping her free hand around the back of his neck, she drew him into a kiss that lasted much longer than the first.
****
Notes:
Lienilde: "People-loving", a twenty-six-year-old healer�s apprentice.
Vorime: "Faithful" or "Steadfast", healer and Lienilde�s master.
Ardil: "Noble Friend", Lienilde�s thirty-three-year-old brother.
Failon: "Generous, Just", Lienilde�s thirteen-year-old brother.
Melde: "Beloved", Lienilde�s mother.
Mandil: "Good Friend", Lienilde�s father.
Inzil: Adunaic for "Flower", Ardil�s wife.
Nolvo: "Secret lore."
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Last Updated July 23, 2007