If it can go wrong, it will.
If you tell someone that a police officer or firefighter will be on-duty today, he or she will take the day off.
Never, ever say "quiet" or "We're not busy" because you will be.
If you need to look busy for anyone (a tour, a public official or the boss), the phone will not ring and officers will have nothing to say.
When you are short a call-taker, the phone will ring off the wall.
If the weather is bad, everyone and their mother will call for road and traffic information.
If you have just busted butt to find information, it will not be the right information or it was obtained an hour ago and no one told you.
If the wrecker (Call-out person, animal control, etc.) does not show up on time, somehow you are responsible.
If the computer is down, somehow you messed it up.
You should know from memory the phone number and address of every police officer, firefighter, bar and business in your district.
You are supposed to know where every officer/firefighter is 24 hours a day, on or off-duty.
If a sting is planned, dispatch will be the last to know.
In a disaster drill, dispatch will get one call, in a disaster they will get hundreds of calls.
In case of emergency in a dispatch center, at least one fool will say, "call 911."
Your family and friends will ask you legal questions and expect you to answer them right.
Same family and friends will expect you to know what happened down the street from them last week, even if they know you were out of town on vacation.
When you give an officer a call, he thinks that you have a crystal ball and know where he is, what streets he will have to take and the conditions of these same streets.
It does not matter how hard you have tried to get more information from a caller, you will never have enough to please the officers.
And this was a good day!
By Pam Hoover, Public Safety Communications, Owensboro (Ken.)