The lack of societal support is the dilemma most gays feel in Singapore, how could they have a social life when most of society condemns them? Well, you will be surprise most gays have an active life.
Although the population of gays is small in Singapore, it is no way inactive. It’s a funny thing when you know that you are a minority, you develop certain sensors that you will not have that is the ability to seek out those of your beliefs. When a gay meets a gay on the street they will have the natural affinity to recognize each other just like that!

The social life of a gay though constricted by powerful anti-gay culture is no-way a bore. In fact, it is often amusing to see others with their eyes wide open looking at them holding hands, caressing each other in public. Well, I once saw this two amazing good looking fellows in a cinema during the screening of the “Bird Cage” at Cathay Cinema, kissing each other at the end of the show. My girlfriend was absolutely horrified; she gave a loud, “YEEEEEEEEEEE”.
The couple just turned around and smiled, I was barely able to contain my laughter. Going to movies, swimming at the beach, going to discos, shopping for clothes, et cetra, et cetra, are just some of the events that heterosexuals like me enjoy that homosexuals enjoy. I mean they are normal people with normal needs, no way is a gay going to hide in shame at home because of his different beliefs. They are proud of who they are and what they are.

While working as a waiter in a gay disco, the most amazing things I see there further convinced me that gays are in fact financially in a better position than most “normals” to enjoy life. Well, getting over $100 dollars on tips during Gay Nights is a norm for all waiters and bartenders. I mean they spend like there is no tomorrow there, my boss often flash his twenty four carat smile on Sunday nights when he hears his cash machine ringing to the pumping beat of the music. I saw gays coming in wearing skin-tight super-short leather shorts, shocking pink dresses with a dog collar and chain, T-shirts with holes cut out on the centre revealing their chests, and other forms of amazing stuff too vivid to describe. The atmosphere was electrifying any one who says that gays do not have a social life should take a look at what I see every Sunday night.

But however, as people are as different as the boundless stars in the universe, not all gays enjoy the same support and understanding from friends and relatives. Being in an Asian society with values, mind sets and familial norms that have been in running in factory mills for thousands of years, it can hardly be expected of Asian homosexuals to adopt the same battle cries of gay liberation as the west overnight. Family comes first. Whatever you do or say bears direct impact upon your family. What would be the consequences of declaring your homosexuality to your family?

Some risk being rejected or even disowned by the family when they came to terms with their friends or family about their sexuality. The possibility of a third gender is profoundly rejected without acceptance; one will have to deal with the tears, anger and stony faces around. What more is there a mood for an active social life when those closest to you can barely understand what you are going through?