"Changing Lanes"

Dragons is sooo stupid.

Forty-four years after the Black Knight, played brilliantly by Yosemite Sam, said this of his dense, fire-breathing mount in the Oscar-winning "Knighty Knight Bugs," I�m here to update and apply the quip to "Changing Lanes": Humans is sooo stupid.

Dummy Gavin Baneck (Ben Affleck) is a swanky lawyer with a swanky partnership at his father-in-law�s swanky Wall Street firm. Doyle Gibson (Samuel L. Jackson) is a good, yet troubled and utterly clueless, divorcee whose Everyman wisdom is at odds with his personal problems. After a fender-bender, Gibson winds up with a file crucial to a high-stakes case Baneck is handling. Vendettas ensue, the men flitting from extortion and duress to sabotage and breaches of social decorum that would curl Miss Manners� nose hair.

It�s only fair to note that "Changing Lanes" has received overwhelmingly positive press. Reviewers lavished hyperbolic praise on it for its insight and edge, and lauded it as an intricate tale of morality and folly. Maybe I was just off my feed that day.

For me, "Changing Lanes" was 98 minutes of literally unbelievable behavior and people waxing philosophical about their own stupidity. Taking characters double-dipped in pathos and bathos with a grain of salt is a fundamental part of watching movies, but here director Roger Michell asks too much. Almost as annoying as the characters� asinine actions is Michell�s cavalier use of juxtaposition: It�s used so much that its ability to build tension, create empathy and add poignancy is wiped away.

What Doyle Gibson said of his life I�ll say of average movies being touted as extraordinary: �God, grant me the strength to accept the things I can�t change.� "Changing Lanes" is at best a decent twist on "Falling Down." At worst it�s a story about stupid people doing incredibly stupid things.

Where's my Looney Tunes tape?