"The Shaft" / "Down"

Corporations often lobby to edit or altogether block films they think could tarnish their reputations or bottom lines. If word of �Down,� the story of an elevator with bloodlust, raised flags at the offices of Otis or Thyssen Dover, I�m certain their PR staffers were relieved when they finally screened the film.

Why? Because it�s an unwaveringly dumb expedition into the machine-gone-bad genre. �Down� makes �Maximum Overdrive� look like �Citizen Kane,� puts �Killdozer� on par with �Metropolis.�

The story centers around the Millennium Building, a 102-story computer-generated landmark in the heart of a painfully pre-9/11 New York City. Square-jawed repairman Mark Newman (James Marshall) and his partner are sent to inspect an elevator after a unsettling mishap involving four pregnant women. Pesky tabloid reporter Jennifer (Naomi Watts) is there too, out for a scoop that, apparently, will help finance her obsession with tacky footwear.

As the body count continues to escalate and the NYPD and FBI are called in to investigate, Mark and Jennifer uncover the real reason why the elevator is giving people the shaft: a nefarious biotech experiment.

One of the most amazing things about �Down� is that reputable actors Dan Hedaya, Michael Ironside and Edward Herrmann got on board for the ride. Aerosmith also deemed it in their best interest to license �Love in an Elevator.� I mean, how bad do these guys need a paycheck?

Another striking element is the film�s inconsistent sound. Dialogue, rife with comments about terrorism possible only before 9/11, goes from boisterous to barely audible, while overdubs peak at decibel levels far, far above the original tracking.

I absolutely love B-grade thrillers and sci-fi flicks, and I was really hoping �Down� would be bad enough to be good enough to recommend. Alas, it was just plain bad.