I walked down the corridor of the hotel. I had become accustomed to living in hotels between wrestling for XWF and Action Wrestling this twenty two year old was worn the fuck out. I took a left and headed into the spa area. I removed my robe and let it drop down by my newly pedicured feet. I stepped into the hot tub as my black bikini disappeared into the water. I leaned my head back and relaxed, closing my eyes momentarily. I heard the familiar voice of my best friend, Estrella Luiz.
"Room for one more?"
I nodded as I spoke again.
"Seems I don't get much time anymore. I just don't know where to begin with Atara and Madison this week, bestie. I mean, I know I wanted this. I mean, on the surface, I will ALWAYS be on the outside looking in within the eyes of the powers that be in XWF. I am not the prettiest. I am not the most experienced. I am just me."
Estrella stopped me mid sentence.
"Being "just you" is much better than being a fucking phony like most people in this business."
I nodded in agreement. Estrella was only nineteen but she was brought up in this business. She had seen more than her fair share of idiocy and fakeness.
"You know Estrella, when I came to XWF I had hoped I would find something more real, something less stupid. Instead I found more of the same. I found people like Atara Themis. You see, Atara is all about her looks. I mean, sure she looks like she was pulled from the runway in Milan but can she fight? So far, I say no. She calls herself "Aphrodite Incarnate" but who was Aphrodite really? Aphrodite was the definition of a slut. She literally had a God for a husband and it STILL wasn't good enough. Most women blame Eve for the bad shit us ladies go through, I blame Aphrodite."
There was a little voice in the back of my head telling me that Atara was simply better than me. I shook my head side to side trying to drown the doubt out.
As I sat there bewildered for a moment, Estrella looked at me in a concerned manner.
"Ger, you ok?"
I had no choice but to lie. I was far from okay but I had to be. I had to hold it in so my opponents couldn't see the lack of confidence I currently had.
"I am all good chica. I am just trying to get past this match on Saturday Savage. I am going to win the cage match and climb the metaphorical ladder in XWF. Madison Dyson is going to be rung number two. She is someone that is here just for shock value. She is a different beast than Atara. She was the Federweight Champion when I entered XWF. I took a shot at her one night when I was high as a fucking kite and she got the upper hand, fucking Nazi bitch."
"Ger, you can't just call someone a Nazi because they beat you."
I interrupted her quickly. Inside I knew the truth about Madison but what if my head had fabricated the whole thing? What if only I saw her as a Nazi and everyone else saw her as a nice and clean cut person? What if I just simply wasn't good enough?
"No, Estrella, like she is a literal Nazi. Like she thinks she is from World War II era Germany and she serves Adolf Hitler."
Estrella looked at me, her jaw dropped open. She was red as a tomato at this point.
"Well fuck her then!"
Estrella was more riled up than me as I attempted to calm her down.
"Don't worry, Estrella. I will take her down on Savage. Like Eva Braun she won't be able to survive the assisted career suicide I am about to bring. I am simply sick and tired of all of these wanna bes running around in the business you and I give so much of ourselves to. Crayzee was simply the beginning. The Goddess of Ganja is going to run roughshod over the entire XWF roster and send the phonies home. Hell the only real challenges I see here are Lux and Fuzz and they are so consumed with having their penis measuring contest that I won't have to worry about them for a while. In the mean time I will sit here and continue going off on this lackadaisical roster. I will not wait to get opportunities, I will simply take them. I am already the number one contender to Bobbi London's Internet Title. Taking that is going to be my first taste of gold in this company and it will be the end of the world for the XWF roster."
Estrella smiled wider as I spoke more matter of factly. I shook my head at her as she spoke.
"Geri, I just don't know what these pendejas are thinking stepping into the ring with are thinking. They can't seriously think they can defeat you. Ger, try not to hurt them too badly. Try to not do too much damage."
I stood up and walked out of the hot tub. I placed my robe on. I walked off and into my room as the scene faded out.
Laying in the bed I sat straight up in a fright. Panting and trying to catch my breath as Derrick sat up and wrapped his arms around me tightly.
"Gerbear, what is it?"
I took a drink of the water bottle on the nightstand as I calmed a bit more. I looked at him as our lips touched.
"Derrick, what if I am not good enough. I mean, I came into wrestling on the back of Lilianna. I joined the Royal Family. Then, I had you. XWF is the first chance I have taken on my own."
Derrick held me tighter before looking me in the eyes. My skin shone in the moonlight creeping in through the Venetian blinds. My eyes filled with a complicated mixture of fear and tears as I looked deep into the eyes of the love of my life. He always had a way of calming me down. He spoke with that deep calming voice I had grown accustomed to.
"Gerbear, you got this. You are a proven World Class athlete. You are an Olympic Gold Medalist. You are an ass kicker. Anyone in any company who steps into the ring with you is making the worst mistake of their lives."
I knew deep down he was only cheering for me because I was his girlfriend.
"Babe, you have wrestled me."
He, once again, interjected himself.
"And I haven't been the same since babe. You pushed me to the limit. I wouldn't have the record title reign I had if it weren't for you constantly pushing me to be better. You made me work my ass off and it shows. You need to do the same in XWF. You need to show everyone what I see when I look at you. You need to prove to them that Geri fucking Miller is a hell of a talent. They will know they stepped into the ring with an absolute monster of an opponent with a killer instinct."
He laid back down as I plopped down in his arms. We both closed our eyes as we drifted back off to sleep.
When I awoke, Derrick was gone. Probably band practice of to the gym. I threw on one of his t shirts as I walked down the hall and into the kitchen to brew a pot of coffee. I poured the coffee and some milk into my mug as I sat down at the bar section of the dining room. I threw in two lumps of sugar and stirred them in as I sipped the coffee. I thought of the words Derrick had said to me the night before. I booted up the camera on my phone as I ran my fingers through my hair. I looked into the camera as I began to speak.
"Hello XWF Universe. I am here to let each and every one of you know who I am and what my plans are for this wonderful company. You see, I am a world renowned athlete. I am someone who strives for perfection. Sometimes we come into the great unknown and we see ourselves as inadequate and we don't know where we belong. That thought process is for the weak spirited and the weak minded. I am someone who simply needs to be the center of attention.
I took another sip of the hot coffee in front of me. I was so anxious to keep my momentum riding high. As I let the warmth take over my body in the cold Wisconsin home.
"What is it that drives you Atara? Is it success? Is it fame? Is it the acceptance that your mommy and daddy didn't give you? One way or another I will expose you for the foolish imbecile you are. I will show everyone what Jessalyn Hart failed to do. I will prove that you are not a winner. Good thing Roxy and Vinnie can't help you, not that they'd care. They used you to get into Bobbi's head. You are nothing but a weapon they can throw away once the deed is done. This whole Goddess Union with Roxy is nothing but a thin veil over your own insecurities. You are using your looks as a mask to hide the lack of talent you have."
I paced back and forth as I pondered what could have been so bad in Madison's life in Germany in the olden days that she saw it fit to come into our generation and attempt to ruin it too. I laughed as I looked into the camera.
"Madison, Madison, Madison. So, tell us, what is going to happen to you when you lose to this newcomer? What is going to happen when a twenty two year old rookie breaks down your mind and your spirit? What is going to happen when the morons in this company realize that you are nothing? The fact of the matter is you lost your Federweight Title to Jim Jimson. You are simply a failure and you were always a failure. You felt the need to run from your own time because you were a failure then, too. No one is going to believe you are anything once I am done with you."
The more I spoke the more I realized I had this match in the bag. Between Estrella, Derrick, and now myself, I felt like I could take on the world. That is how I felt anyway. I was an outsider with no friends and no allies in XWF. I was the newcomer and I had to prove that me beating Crayzee was no fluke. I had to bring it all together and be the only one to walk away from the triple threat steel cage match. I would stop at nothing to prove my dominance. I was ready to show the world what I could do and no one was going to stop me. No one was going to talk down to me. I was done allowing that to happen. I was done being the no name rookie.
My name is Geri Miller, and I came to dominate the XWF with my athletic skill and my never surrender attitude. Madison, Atara, welcome to MY world!
The scene faded out as I began washing my mug and heading back into the bedroom.
Dear Diary,
The XWF was finally seeing who I was. The wrestling world was starting to take notice. Finally I was ready to embrace my spot as a celebrity in the world. Derrick and Estrella were proud of me and I needed to make what few fans I had proud. I was going to show everyone how far I had come. No longer was I that little girl who didn't know who her parents were. No longer was I the one who was going to blamed for anything anymore. I didn't have anything personal against Atara or Madison. Hell, I barely even knew who they were. Atara is a puppet in the show put on by Vinnie Lane and Roxy Cotton. Madison was someone who truly believes she is a time traveler. Ultimately these two are beyond ignorant. I thought I smoked a lot of weed, however, these two are on some major shit to think the things they do.
Now here is the thing. People can say that I haven't won anything yet and they may be right. I do have an Internet Title shot in my hands. I have already proven I can win. Sure, it was a throwaway match to some but to me it was a chance for me to make sure the XWF management see exactly what I can do and I think I made that point clear as crystal. I made it known that gold is what I am after. I made it known that I don't give two fucks who is in front of me, i will mow them over. I will knock them off the face of the wrestling map. I was ready to prove that this is not just entertainment but rather is an ACTUAL sport with ACTUAL athletes. I have shown that pure athletes are what this sport needs. We don't need anymore models like Roxy or Atara. We don't need anymore nut jobs like Crayzee or Madison. The world had enough wannabes it was time for the real deal. It was MILLER TIME!
Geri Miller