| How To Have Fun Irritating (and Quite Possibly Scaring) People You�re standing in an elevator and you feel eyes on you, you look over and realize one of the other passengers is staring at you with a huge smile on his/her face. You look away hoping he/she will stop staring but you can still feel his/her eyes on you. You turn back and sure enough, there he/she is, same smile, still staring, then all of the sudden he/she says, �I�ve got new socks on!� and continues staring. Now sure that may have been a bit frightening, and it can also be pretty irritating. But didn�t it also seem kind of fun? Wouldn�t you like to be able to do fun little stupid things like that? Well now you can, with the help of this article you will be annoying the hell out of people in no time, and you�ll be having fun doing it. There are no specific steps to being annoying, just pick things from the list and have fun. WARNIING: This article is not intended for people who are overly considerate or nice, if you are one of those people you can read the article and possibly grow out of your bad habit of being nice and considerate once you see how much fun being annoying can be, or you can just have a good laugh and continue with your ways. But I strongly suggest coming over to the dark side, evil has so much more fun. Note: Some of these were stolen from other people's lists, but I can't remember whose or where I saw them, otherwise I'd give them credit. At The Movies (not for those who actually want to see the movie, but why would anyone want that?): * Wear a really big hat. * During the preveiws turn and yell yo the projector room, �Hey, can you fast forward it?� * Open an umbrella (not for the overly superstitious). * Yell out what you think is going to happen. * Talk on the phone. * Say, �Oooo......� whenever someone kisses (on or off screen). * Talk back to the characters on screen (it�s not annoying if you�re at The Rocky Horror Picture Show). * Wear a cape and when you go to get popcorn jump up and yell, �I am Batman! Ha ha ha!� * Clap if the good guy dies. * Boo or cheer when certain characters come on screen. * Throw wet gummy bears at the screen. * Throw popcorn into the air and yell, �It�s snowing!� (not all that believible in Florida, or indoors for that matter). * Sit in the back and play with a laser pen. * Tell people that the seat next to you has been taken (by your invisable friend). * Sing along with all the songs (especially if you don�t know the words). In An Elevator (more to scare people than generally irritate them): * Give everyone name tags with silly names already writted on them and insist that if they don�t wear them you will be very offended. * Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall (maybe peek out every so often then hide your face again). * Tell everyone to call you Admiral. * Make Explosion noises everytime someone pushes a button. * Grimace painfully while hitting your forehead and muttering, �Shut up! All of you just shut up!� * Yell out what floor you�re on (may get some people angry at you, most annoying things do that). * With a mad/crazy look on your face, announce in a demonic voice, �I must find a more suitable host body.� * Listen to the walls with a stethoscope. * Stand in the corner pointing and staring menacingly. * Stare at someone with a huge smile on your face and say, �I�ve got new socks on!� (Then just watch, while supressing your laughter, as they push the buttons over and over trying to get to their floor and out of the elevator as fast as they possibly can.) At A Mall/Store (no, nothing you�ll get arrested or kicked out for, as far as I know): * Touch everything. * Move things around. * Start eating something then put it back on the self (as long as you don�t get caught you won�t get in trouble, so be careful). * Take all of the coupons from the little red things. * Pick somethings then stand in a long line and after you get to the register decide you don�t want them anymore. Online: * IM people you don�t know and pretend you do. * Go into fan chat rooms and say that the person the room is dedicated to sucks (or something equally as mean). * In chat rooms type the same thing over and over again. * In chat rooms type s}im/s}gotmail (plays the little im noise or the �You�ve got mail.�) * Spell everything wrong. * Write sentences out of order. * Write things that make no sense. * Change fonts and colors everytime you type something (notice how much I enjoy it). Anywhere: * Sing/hum the most annoying/catchy song you can think of. * Follow someone around. * Pretend you don�t speak english. * Speak in a really bad accent. * Walk up to people and ask, �Are you my mommy/daddy?� * Stare at someone then point and laugh (do not do this to people with disabilaties or if they look really insecure, if you do it�s not funny, it�s just plain mean). And now that I have given you this gift of histarical annoyances I will disappear from you life as quickly as I entered it. Now that you have learned the way, go forth and irritate as many people as you like. I leave you with this: �I�ve got new socks on!� -Kristen Galiano |