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Jilted Bridegroom |
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Jilted Bridegroom -The prayer |
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1 The thought |
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Matthew 1:18-20 This is how Jesus Christ came to be born. His mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph; but before they came to live together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. Her husband* Joseph; being a man of honour and wanting to spare her publicity, decided to divorce her informally. He had made up his mind to do this when the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, �Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because has conceived what is in her by the Holy Spirit. |
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In a Jewish betrothal, the man was already called the �husband�, and he could only be released by a legal act of repudiation (divorce). Mary was also in considerable danger, for Deuteronomy 22:23 states that ��a betrothed virgin who sleeps with another man in the town should be stoned to death.� So, by �divorcing� her Joseph would have been removing her status as a betrothed virgin |
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These verses as well as being a description of how Jesus came to be born, are also a picture for us of what the Lord means when He talks about weddings, how He sees the bride to be. It also shows another aspect of the Lord in Joseph the �man of honour�. By taking her as his wife, he was taking on the �disgrace� himself, effectively stating himself as the one who committed the sin. |
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Ephesians 5:22-27 A wife should put her husband first, as she does the Lord. A husband is the head of his wife, as Christ is the head and the Saviour of the Church, which is his own body. Wives should always put their husbands first, as the Church puts Christ first. A husband should love his wife as much as Christ loved the Church and gave his life for it. He made the Church holy by the power of his word, and he made it pure by washing it with water. Christ did this, so that he would have a glorious and holy Church, without faults or spots or wrinkles or any other flaws. |
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Verses normally used to make husbands and wives feel guilty for the way they fail to live up to the standards of the Lord! But if we look again with eyes of grace � there is something else here much deeper. The Lord is showing the bride nature of the Church, He is as much talking to us about how He feels about His bride. |
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A truly loving husband desires to see his wife excels. Nothing brings him more joy than to see her fulfil her potential. When she is sick or distressed, he feels that too. When others abuse or mistreat her, he becomes indignant and angry, seeking to protect and defend her. He will always delight in seeing the best for her. |
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The wife may not always appreciate this, there may be times when she would rather do things her way, than rely on her husband. This is when the husband needs to �wash� his wife by speaking out words of truth to her to lovingly guide her in the right way. There isn�t room for the husband to force the wife in any of this. |
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(In reality a husband may at times look for the easy life rather than taking on his part as fully as he should � but as we are talking about Jesus here, we are safe to recognise that He is the perfect model for a husband!) |
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What remains unsaid in this passage is how the husband should react if his wife is unfaithful? For this, we have to search other places. Although, the marriage of the Lamb has not yet taken place, we as the Church are �betrothed� to Him, and as we see, the Lord takes this betrothal very seriously. We have not yet reached that place of complete union with Him, but He still see us as His Bride � Unfaithfulness is treated the same as adultery, punishable by stoning to death under the law. |
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Praise the Lord that He is merciful and abounding in grace. He does not treat the unfaithful betrothed bride in this way, Hosea 2:5-8 |
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For their mother has played the harlot; She who conceived them has behaved shamefully. For She said, �I will go after my lovers, Who give me my bread and my water, My wool and my linen, My oil and my drink.� Therefore, behold, I will hedge up your way with thorns, and wall her in, So that She cannot find her paths. She will chase her lovers, But not overtake them; Yes, She will seek them, but not find them. Then She will say, �I will go and return to my first husband, For then it was better for me than now.� |
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The Lord doesn�t force the wife to abandon her behaviour, but he makes it difficult for the wife to take that path, not to punish her, but to prevent her getting into more trouble with her lovers. He makes her actually have to make an effort to rebel, so that it is clear that the choice she has made. Verses 9-13: |
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�For she did not know that I gave her grain, new wine, and oil, and multiplied her silver and gold � which they prepared for Baal. Therefore I will return and take away My grain in its time And My new wine in its season, And will take back My wool and My linen, Given to cover Her nakedness. Now I will uncover Her lewdness in the sight of her lovers, and no one shall deliver her from My hand. I will also cause all Her mirth to cease, Her feast days, Her New Moons, Her Sabbaths � All Her appointed feasts. |
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And I will destroy her vines and her fig trees, Of which she has said, �These are my wages that my lovers have given me.� So I will make them a forest, and the beasts of the field shall eat them. I will punish her for the days of the Baals to which She burned incense. She decked herself with her |
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earrings and jewellery, and went after Her lovers;but Me She forgot,� says the LORD. |
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As the Bride rebels, the blessings that she had with her husband are withdrawn. The times of feasting with Him, the gifts she received from Him. Her eyesight has become dimmed, before the turning away she could see the things that her husband was doing for her; but |
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as she becomes unfaithful, all that she received from Him she now attributes to the current lover(s). |
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I guess what we call selective amnesia � In rebelling against her husband, she has to justify her new course of action, and can only do that by persuading herself that the new lover is better, and forgetting all His benefits, Psalm 103:1-2, Bless the LORD, O my soul; And all that is within me, bless His holy name! Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits� |
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So what 'vicious' judgement does the Lord call down on her? Hosea 2:14-15 |
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�Therefore, behold, I will allure Her. I will bring Her into the wilderness, and speak comfort to Her. I will give Her vineyards from there, and the Valley of Sadness becomes a door of hope; She shall sing there, as in the days of Her youth, as in the day when She came up from the land of Egypt.� |
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The wife may love the thrill of the adultery, but it is deeply unsatisfying. It brings her into the place of the wilderness. The husband would be perfectly justified in abandoning her there. Everything she brought upon herself, the lovers may have enticed her; but her husband made it difficult for her to follow them. So, she had to make an active decision to abandon her husband and chase after them. |
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A hedge of thorns doesn�t spring up suddenly to block the bride�s way! Those thorns were there all along, they form a hedge across the path of rebellion. It is the love of Christ that puts that hedge there.. To get through the thorns the Bride actually has to make an effort. As she continues in rebellion, the thorns tear at her flesh. The beauty she once had is damaged by cuts by scratches and wounds, the clothes are ripped from her. That once beautiful skin is scarred� The path back has no thorns, it is only to continue on in rebellion that brings more wounding. |
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But the opportunity to return to Him is always there. What He brings is quite different. As she comes into that wilderness experience, He is still there, not forceful, but gently offering restoration. At her valley of deepest sadness � He comes bringing the hope of total and utter reconciliation to the time of greatest intimacy! What an amazing Lord we have :O) |
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Jilted Bridegroom -The prayer |
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Back to Bear Thoughts |
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