The Sohmas all stared at Kyou, who looked down and shuffled his feet. He didn't
know what to expect.
He had seen how his family cared (or didn't care) about him and was happy that
there were people who love him and almost went against gods as they thought
he hurt them.
He couldn't figure out why Shigure had cried but Halmin told him that he would understand soon enough...
His thinking was interrupted as Momiji raced at him and began to cry. Kisa and Hiro followed and Kyou tried to soothe them as he knelt down and hugged the three. Then he was hugged from behind by Haru, Yuki and Ritsu.
As the three children calmed down and he could stand up again, the three wouldn't loose their hold of his legs he looked directly in Shigures eyes. The man stood before him with Hatori and Ayame just a step behind him if Shigure should break down again.
The novelist seemed undecided... but suddenly he lunged at Kyou and hugged him tightly.
"Oh God thanks you are ok. I thought you had to go through everything I did and I would never have forgiven myself if it had happened. I am sorry that I couldn't protect you better, but I couldn't remember the incident the two told us about I am so sorry" that all was whispered in Kyou's ear as Shigure wept at his shoulder.
Instinctive Kyou began to stroke Shigures back and rocked back and forth. Behind Shigure Hatori and Ayame looked anxious to help Shigure and to hold Kyou.
"Hatori, Ayame come over here!"
They came nearer and as they were in range he took hold of their hands and caught them in an awkward embrace with Shigure in the middle.
Both Ayame and Hatori stroked over Kyou's hair and face before they took hold of Shigure, who loosened his hold on Kyou and with one last look turned around into his friends embrace where he continued to sob.
"You all wonder what Shigure is so torn up about... Normally it would be
his secret to tell but it is destroying him and we can't have that. As little
Shigure reached the age of ten some members of the family got the idea that
the dog must guard the family despite every danger. So they began to beat him
into submission. But they didn't stop at that... no! THEY RAPED HIM TILL HE
DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHO HE WAS ANYMORE!!!
Then Shigure got a shock and forget about it. The men who did it died and only
the women remained and they couldn't hurt him. In his subconscious he knew he
shouldn't trust any man but he began to trust his two friends, Hatori and Ayame.
They were always there when he needed them. But then the relationship changed
and the little dog started to feel other feelings towards his friend. Feelings
he has never had before. Then he decided he was ugly and worthless although
he still couldn't remember and began to put on a mask. Always cheerful and girl
chasing. Then he found out about the relationship Haru and Yuki had and began
to remember. He freaked out as he was told about Hatori and Ayame, that they
were together."
The Cousins looked shocked at each other. No one would have thought that Shigure had been raped.
Ayame and Hatori backed away as they heard that. They hadn't known... They thought Gure wasn't interested because he was always chasing girls but now his behavior made sense.
Shigure sank to the floor and wept. He wasn't worth their love, otherwise they would have approached him. He didn't know how he would have reacted but he then he would know that he wasn't as dirty as he thought and felt.
He didn't realize it but he had spoken out loud.
The two lovers were shocked. Shigure wanted them although he had been broken seventeen years ago. He just thought he wasn't worth it.
That could be changed.
They went to him and sank down beside him. Shigure wouldn't look up so Hatori took his chin in his hand and kissed him gently on his right cheek while Ayame kissed the left.
"Shigure, Ayame and I, we love each other very much and we always will be together. But at the time we two got together we both knew that we loved you equally to each other and wanted you to belong to us. We thought you weren't interested in men so we decided not to say anything because our friendship is the most important thing to us. I don't know why you thought you couldn't trust us. We always told each other anything and now we discover that you suffered so much and we didn't know it!" here Hatori had to stop because his tears ran freely.
Ayame took over and turned Shigures face to himself.
"We will always love you, Shi-chan! But you must understand that we love you and hope you love and trust us enough to try to be with us. We will never hurt you. Not your body and never your heart! You are beautiful and incredible to us and we want you to belong with us. I just have to let you know that when you tell us you don't love us, that we will love you in silence."
Now Shigure was crying again. Just because of a different reason.
He was loved.
By them.
By the people he loved and trusted the most.
He was loved by Aya-chan and Tori-chan.
And...
And...
...he loved them back.
Equally!
But... had he enough courage to try and be with men, in a sexually way?
He didn't know and couldn't tell right away.
‚But I'll be damned if I don't try. They have never before hurt me.'
In a tiny voice he tells his Aya-chan and Tori-chan that he wants to try but
he is not sure whether or not he can have sex with them.
tbc