Title: Rider in the storm
Author: Lusmeitli
Rating: PG-17
for language
Show: DA
Disclaimer: They’re not mine,
he’s not mine, I’m not mine, we’re all free….
Genre: Experimental
Pairing: Surprise, surprise
Summary: Some experiment goes wrong.
A/N: All
right, BHG is to blame for she started this with “Hot monkey sex, huh?” and I
just couldn’t resist. I had this in my head and it wanted to get out whilst
writing on another fic (with lots of bullets, angst, bullets,
romance and bullets, I promise). ;-) Anyhow, kindly read and let me know what
you think.
“Max?”
<Whispers.>
“Shhh! Be quiet! They’ll hear.”
“I doubt
that they even hear themselves, with all the squeaking and squealing…”
Squeaking and squealing.
<Muffled giggles.>
“Stop it!
They’ll hear!”
“I think
they’re way too busy with themselves.”
“Alec?
Promise me we won’t EVER again sneak off and try to have sex in his bed.”
“Well, the
idea was good and if I’m right it was even yours. But who could have guessed
they had the same idea? Maybe it’s the thunderstorm, all the electricity in the
air, makes your hormones go overboard….”
Muffled sounds of gobbling smooching.
“Yuck! How
disgusting!”
“You’re just
jealous that it’s not you causing these sounds, you idiot.”
“Honestly,
Max, this sounds like a dog licking water and not like a kiss.”
“Well, maybe
it’s a very passionate kiss.”
“Max, I was
completely ignorant of your comical talent. A passionate kiss, from a man with
as much passion as a broomstick, hahaha—“
“Stop
laughing, they’ll find us! What do you know about kissing anyway?”
“You and I know
that a passionate kiss sounds like this.”
<Ragged breathing. Cocky grin.>
“Well?”
“Well what?”
“Admit it
already.”
“Alright, so
that was a passionate kiss.”
“I rule.”
<Rolls eyes.>
Sounds of clothes falling to the ground. Loud thunder.
“What are
they doing now?”
“O, come on,
Maxie, it’s not that hard to guess, you know.”
“What? But
they can’t, we’re still here!”
“Yeah, but
they don’t know that, so be quiet.”
“We have to
get out NOW!”
“No. We stay
right here. Come on, it’s entertaining. It won’t take long anyway.”
“How would
you know?”
“Come on,
Maxie, did you ever have a look at him? Seriously, he’s not what I’d call a sex
bomb.”
“O Logan, oh yes, you wild stallion! Let me ride you!”
“O, Asha, whip me!”
Sound of a whip, followed by a very poor male
imitation of whinnying
<Raised
eyebrows.>
“She really
whipped him?”
“I’m afraid
so.”
<Muffled fit of laughter.>
“Stop it
already.” <Giggling.> “They’ll
hear.”
“You know, if she bounces any harder on him,
they’ll know for sure we’re here.”
“Don’t
worry, the sex is not that violent. Despite the whip.”
“So, show me you’re a good boy and let me ride you
rough.”
Another poor male imitation of whinnying.
<Clasps hands in front of mouth to muffle giggles.>
“O Asha, yeah, ride me without a saddle!”
<Mouthing.>“What?”
“Rickety
<Another fit of laughter, muffled by Alec’s
shoulder.> Loud thunder.
“O Logan, I want to ride you into the sunset!”
“Uh yeah, baby, ride me till you’re sore!”
“Ugh, that’s
just disgusting.”
“I’m glad we
agree.”
Sound of a headboard banging to the wall.
“Let’s bow
our heads and pray.”
“Alec?”
Accelerated banging of headboard. Loud thunder.
“O GOD, Logan, O MOTHER MARY, yes, O DEAR GOD!”
“O GOD Asha, HOLY JESUS!”
Banging of headboard stops.
“Amen.” <Counts down fingers.> “Four,
three, two, one and: the grand final.”
Two more bangs of headboard. Loud moaning. Ragged
breathing.
“See, they
get up and get dressed.”
Sounds of two people getting dressed.
“So, uh, Asha, how was I?”
“Fantastic, my wild stallion.”
Steps to the
door, door opens and closes.
“Max, I’m
waiting.”
“For what?” <Crawls out from under the bed.>
“For your
acceptance speech.” <Follows.>
“Huh?”
“That I
saved you from THIS experience.”
<Smack.> Loud thunder.
“Ow, is that
how you show your gratitude?”
“No, that’s
for your cocky grin. My gratitude, I’ll show you at home.”
“Can you
give me a hint?”
<Muffled moans. Ragged breathing.>
“I like
grateful Max.”
“Now, let’s
get out of here. They must be wondering where we are.”
“Wait, let
me take this.”
<Raises eyebrow.>
“You surely
don’t want to take this home?”
“Nah.” <Cocky grin.> “I’m just gonna have
some fun with
<Grins back.> “You forgot the holy-Mary-o-dear-God.”
<Stops at door.>
“By the way,
we both agree on that she faked her orgasm?”
“Well, I
sure do. But I’d like to know how you would know?”
“It’s the
sound, baby, the sound.”
“Could you
expand on that?”
“You know,
THAT was just too much. Too religious, too much being said, not enough moaning,
exaggerated, not real. If I’m done with a woman, she isn’t able to utter more
than some incoherent, mushy babbling. As you know.”
“Uh yeah?
Could you refresh my memory?”
<Swallows.>
“I could
give you a hint.”
“Go on.”
<Moans, muffled by a kiss.> Loud thunder.
“See, we
haven’t even started yet and you’re not even thinking NOW.”
<Sways slightly.>
“Oh, but you
are?”
“Well, not
for much longer. My blood starts to withdraw to a very delicate area of my
body.”
<Looks down to his bulge.>
“O. That must
be painful, Alec. Does it help, if I fondle the hurting part?”
<Devilish grin.>
<Swallows.>
“Evil woman.
We’ll get to that. But first we hand the whip back to cowgirl and her
stallion.”
<Opens door.>
“