Well the Democratic National Convention (DNC) was in Boston the last
week of July. For Democrates this was a
big event and party. For all other Bostonians or people that work in
Boston, it was hell week. Now the Mayor
of beantown wanted the DNC in Boston because of the money it would
bring to the city. With security and
everything else i've heard this thing will cost about Million dollars
a day, maybe more.
We did just build a new Convention Center in Boston so at least it
will get some use. Oh no wait, the convention is
at the Fleet Center, not the Convention center. What was I thinking.
Getting in and out of the city should be interesting. All the major
roads near the fleet center are being closed at night.
Trains that go to North Station won't go there. Riding the Orange
Line subway? No stops at North Station and
nothing will be allowed on the train larger then a loaf of bread. I
guess that counts briefcases and laptops out.
****
Britney Spears is engaged to one of her dancers, Kevin Federline. Her
new beau left his girlfriend to be with Britney.
The mother of his child and expecting another child, I guess Brit is
going to be a step mom.
I'm sure he won't cheat on Britney like he did to his previous lady.
Britney's kind of sliding down my appeal meter, I'm sure she'll be
shocked to hear that. Are we seeing the real Britney?
Usually when a girl is as hot and some what trampy , I'm in to it.
But it just doesn't fit Britney. Maybe if you went back to
your wholesome appeal and tried singing in concert instead of doing 8
million custome changes, lip syncing and jirating
on stage, well the jirating is ok, you would come off as a better person.
Let's face it, something doesn't seem right. You marry some guy for
48 hours. You then get the home wrecker tag with
this new guy. Are you trying to keep up with J-Lo or drive your Mom
nuts. What's next, acusations that your parents
stole your money?
****
I surprised my girls at Nellos with some fruit. I'm always bringing
in chocolate and every now and again I here about
how bad it is for them. I don't know what they are doing, but trust
me they look fine. Anyway, I have "threatened" to
bring in fruit someday. Well that day was July 23.
I went to this place called Edible arranagments (Edible
Arrangements.com). They make fruit baskets, but arrange and cut
the fruit like flowers and stuff. I went into their Natick store on
Thursday and ordered the Hearts and Berries. It comes
Strawberries, Pineapple, and berries.
I had them make the card out to Lisa and the Girls. Then they told me
it would be delivered sometime between 11:00 and
3:00. Lisa doesn't start till after 4:00, so I had them change it to
Lonnie and the girls. Lonnie is the Bartender on during
the day, I knew she would be their. Well I guess this wasn't a good
move on my part. They lady at the place says to me,
what happened to Lisa, she's just on of the girls now? So I tell her
about the hours. I tell my Mom what I did, you could
have kept her name on it, they would have given it to her. It was for everyone.
When I got to Nellos that night it was gone. They loved it. I got
lots of thank yous, hugs, even got a free drink out of the
deal. This being a nice guy is starting to pay dividends.
****
The last weekend in July I had a blast at Nellos.
Friday Night I went in and sat at the bar.
I noticed one of the waitresses, Jen, all dressed up, not in the
usual black and white waitress outfit. She was standing next
to one of the new computers.
I asked if she had the night off, but no she was working, she was the
computer monitor. She was helping the other girls learn
the ropes. They have a nice new flat screen system, the computers not
the girls. It was great, the computer and Jen were on
my left so I could look over all night and stare. I started to get
nervous when Jen left for a few minutes and I still got
excited looking at the computer, I think it's time for a new career.
Later in the night one of the waitresses was reading palms, it was a
slow night. She was reading Jen's so as they finished
I leaned over and asked if there was anything in there about an older
man. I was told no George it's someone she hasn't
met yet. With any luck Jen will suffer an unfortunate blow to the
head, get amnesia, and I can meet her for the first time.
Only kidding, I don't want to see any harm come to Jen.
Saturday night I was at the bar again.
My Bartender Cindy told me she had the movie I let her borrow, it was in her car. (Remember this).
The last couple of weeks I kept hearing about this Drink Cindy made
for my Friday night waitresses, Lisa, A Pink Lemonade.
Southern Comfort, Amaretto, Sour Mix and Grenadine. Jen must have had
a dozen after work Friday, ok only 3.
So I tried one. Very good. Sweet.
So Cindy asked me if I wanted another drink, I said yes. She made me
a Captain and Coke. Hello. I was like, well that
isn't what I was drinking but what the heck. She realized what she
did, but I can't see good rum going to waste.
So I had dinner and a couple more Captain and Cokes. It was after
10:00 and things were winding down. Cindy was talking
to Jen, Debbie, Mary and Jill when I walked over to say good night. I
said my goodbyes and then looked at Cindy and
said, So I'll meet you at your car. She remembers and gets up to get
her keys. Now everyone is wondering what's going on
at the car.
I told them not to worry, She'll be back in about 15 mins. Jen
comments, it takes you that long, to which I replied, hey
I'm good.
So I went out the main door and Cindy out the side door. I told her,
what ever you do when you go back in, tell them I was
a good kisser.
Of course the flaw in my plan is Cindy was back to work about a
minute later, so much for 15 mins. I should have had
her russle up her hair a bit too.
****
Help Needed.
Hey does anyone know sign language?
My new girlfriend Jennifer is fantastic and quite a little mynk in the sack.
Anyway, I want to learn to sign "more baby more" because my neighbors are complaining about the noise.
Bada Bing.
Thank you, thank you I'll be here all week, try the tuna casserole.
****
Here is a blast from the past. This bit first appeared in October
2001. I really like this one. It was inspired by a song from
the rock group Kix, called Yeah Yeah Yeah.
I'm bringing back since I have some new readers and all. I also want
to recommend, if you get a chance, listen to some
Kix. Their biggest song was the 80's power ballad Don't Close Your
Eyes. On the Kix Live Cd you can hear a great
version of Yeah Yeah Yeah. Enjoy,
Be Very Very Quiet.... It's woman season - I'm Woman hunting (Insert best Elmer Fudd laugh here).
I never can find the right girl.
Just once I would like to find a nice, loving, caring , rich, big
titted, nymphomaniac. I'm a nice guy, I bathe. Sure I've got Blue
Balls, so what.
Take what happened to me last night....
The girl that walked out on me on Labor day, well she came back and said, "I don't have to go home tonight."
So I went out and bought a case of cold cold Heinikens and a big
bottle of Captain Morgan, Not the little bottle, the big
bottle, and some Chinese food.
We partied and she drank my beer, drank my rum and ate all my food.
5:00 in the morning has come, note that 5:00 has come and George has
yet to come. She was wrecked with tears coming
down her face and going into her blouse, she had snot coming out of
her nose and drool coming from her mouth. It was
nothing but Tears and Snot and Drool, oh my. Tears and Snot and
Drool, Oh my...
She looks at me and says, George I feel sick, I have to go home now, and she threw up all over my carpet.
It smelt really really bad. It smelt like, it smelt like puke. Only puke smells like puke.
I was trying to be nice to this girl, giving her food and drink and
she put it back on my carpet in a steaming hunk of puke.
I was pissed.
I lost it, I said,
"You, no good for nothing
Fuzzy headed
Big eyed
Booger nosed
Blow me lips
Double chinned
Flat chested
Hairy back
Big fat hairy ass
She had crow bar black pubic hair
And she had cellulitic legs
And she did not shave her legs
She had big feet like Bozo the Clown
Oh she weabled but she won't fall down
I said, you get your teary snotty drooling hairy ass out of my home
you whore bag pig bitch! "