March News

A Japanese toy company says it's developed a gadget that will enable people to control their dreams. 

Takara has come up with the Yumemi Kobo, or Dream Workshop, which it claims can put people in charge of their dreams. 

To work the gadget, the owner has to stare at a photograph of what they would like to dream about and then record, in their
own words, how the dream is supposed to pan out.

Once users are sleeping, the gadget goes to work by combining the voice recording, lights, music and aromas to stimulate
sleepers whenever it detects rapid eye movement - a sign that someone is dreaming.

Eight hours later, users are gently awakened by soft lighting and music to ensure that pleasant memories of the night before 
are not instantly erased.

But Takara says it can't guarantee complete customer satisfaction. "We are still experimenting, mainly with company
employees," said marketing executive Kenji Hattori

Webmaster Note: This is no joke, this works. The other night I was staring at a picture of Janet Jackson and I had a dream
about her. She was singing to me and had a wardrobe malfunction and her right breast popped out. Unfortunately, I also
watched American Ninja before bed so for some reason I threw a throwing star at her breast and it stuck on the nipple. No 
wait, that wasn't a dream, that was the super bowl, never mind.

****

A Tennessee woman has sued Janet Jackson and others involved in her breast-baring Super Bowl halftime show, saying
millions of people are owed monetary damages for exposure to lewd conduct, court records show. 

The suit, filed earlier this week in federal court in Knoxville, Tennessee, also names pop star Justin Timberlake, who performed
with Jackson, CBS Broadcasting, show producer MTV, and the parent of those two companies, Viacom. 

CBS and Viacom said they had no comment on the filing. 

The action seeks a court order to prevent anything like last Sunday's stunt from being repeated on U.S. network television
prior to 10 p.m. local time when children might be watching. 

It also asks the court to declare the matter a class action for purposes of damages. No dollar figure is mentioned in the suit, 
but it estimates that over 80 million U.S. viewers might be due compensation. CBS has said the game drew an average
viewership of just under 89.6 million people. Advertising during the game sold for more than $2 million (1.1 million pounds) 
a spot. 

The suit states that the ultimate compensatory damage figure, should a jury decide to grant damages, should be no higher 
than what the parties being sued made out of participating in and airing the Super Bowl and its halftime show. 

If additional punitive damages are granted, it adds, they should be no higher than the "gross annual revenues of each defendant
for the last three years..." 

Those figures would probably run into the billions of dollars, according to the Smoking Gun, a Web site that first published 
the court papers. 

During the halftime show Timberlake tore off half of Jackson's black leather bustier, exposing her right breast, while the 
two were singing a duet. 

Jackson took the blame but said "it was not my intention that it go as far as it did." 

Webmaster note: It was just a breast. On my TV I didn't even see anything. It wasn't to the next day that I realized what
happened. 

***

A London gym has developed a new fitness regime that it guarantees will increase the frequency, intensity and quality of
customer's orgasms.

The Shag Workout is being launched at Gymbox in Holborn - and some participants claim to have reached a climax during 
test classes.

Gym bosses say the class involves a three-step process that aims to develop sexual technique, confidence and endurance
resulting in a more satisfying session in the sack whilst improving fitness levels.

A Gymbox spokesman said: "Once inhibitions have been lowered and specific muscles targeted 25% of women participants 
in the test classes have reported experiencing the elusive and much sought after multiple orgasm for the first time in their lives.

He added all participants have said their sex lives have vastly improved and stamina levels increased. The workout
incorporates relaxation and meditation with visualization techniques to help develop various Tantric sex skills.

Each week a different Tantric sex technique is focused upon to concentrate on different aspects of lovemaking. These 
include guidance on achieving multiple orgasms, helping your partner to orgasm without ejaculation and how to prolong sex 
and the climax.

Later classes include the Motion in the Ocean aerobic workout, which is tailored to work targeted areas of the body in 
specific ways. This is achieved via a technique called F.A.S.T.E.R (Flexibility, Agility, Stamina, Tone, Endurance and Rhythm)
, which utilizes functional sexual movements.

Workout creator and Gymbox founder, Richard Hilton said: "The Gymbox Shag Workout means that there is now a proven,
embarrassment-free way to improve your sex life through hands-on coaching, rather than theoretical hearsay or guess work."

****

NEW YORK (Reuters) - The mother of a 2-year-old boy who hurt himself in a playground in Stamford, Connecticut, is 
suing the city for income she says the toddler is losing because the injury prevents him working as a model, a local newspaper
 has reported. 

The Advocate said Deena Mader filed a claim last week saying she wants compensation for her child Konrad's medical bills,
pain and suffering and a "lost wage amount due to his inability to audition or take modeling or commercial jobs while his head
heals". 

The child, who lives in affluent Greenwich, Connecticut, received stitches after crashing into a railing at the public playground,
the paper said on Friday. 

Mader said the green-painted railing had sharp edges and blended in with the shrubbery. "A design flaw or oversight at this
new playground" was to blame for the injury, she said in her filing. 

Neither Mader or a spokesman for the city could be contacted for comment on Friday. 


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