Note: Some of these stories will be outdated, I had them planned prior to the Edison Tribute in February.
I have to start out with saying congratulations to the Super Bowl
Champion, New England Patriots. What a game. Carolina
pushed the Pats to the edge.
I'm not going to say anything about the half time show and Janet
Jackson. Enough has been said. It was just a breast. If
an attractive star wants to flash a little hootie for my
entertainment, I'm OK with that.
You know what surprised me? I always thought Texas was a warm place,
put judging by the half time show I would say
it was a little nippley out.
****
Well the New Year got of to a depressing start for yours truly.
Luckily everything turned around on Jan 5, Britney Spears is
once again available. I figure I have a shot now more then ever. Sure
her marriage to Jason Alexander only lasted a couple
of days but, if you look at him and me, we have a lot in common. Plus
he played a character named George on Seinfeld.
So she must like her men with a little bulk. What's that? Oh, Jason
Allen Alexander, I look nothing like him. Ah, never mind.
****
I don't follow College Football much but the way they choose a
national champion seems bizarre. Talk about looking for
a controversy. His year there are two champions. The LSU Tigers and
USC Trojans. I thought USC, under former Pats
coach Pete Carroll, was the better team. In a recent poll 7 out of 10
women also thought USC was #1. Why? Because
they come ribbed for her pleasure, I thank you.
****
My friend Pam and her boyfriend of 4 years just broke up. Now it's no
secret that Pam is hot so naturally I was there to be
a good friend and comfort her in her time of need. I told Pam I had
recently read in Cosmo that most women say the best
way to get over a man is to get under another one. Unfortunately she
has morals or something and didn't agree with Cosmo
or my suggestion. Now that I think of it, I think it was Stuff
Magazine and not Cosmo, my bad.
****
Who is this Mr. Blackwell? Each year he comes out with his worst
dressed list. Is this his job? How much does he make
for one day of work? Has anyone seen this guy? How does he dress?
This year Paris Hilton took the cake as worst dressed (Don't worry Paris, I hear you're a shoe in for best undressed).
Also on the list are,
Madonna and Britney Spears (Why are they listed together?)
Shania Twain (To quote Wayne and Garth, Shwing)
Jessica Simpson (Double Shwing)
Courtney Love (okay I'll buy that one)
My guess is Mr. Blackwell has a thing against cleavage.
****
Well I did it again, I cooked. This time it was a full three course meal.
I stuck with steak tips. I also made rice and what do you call those
things that go with a meal, sounds like table, now
I remember, Vegetables.
I tried a little of Emrils Green Pepper sauce, WOW! Holy Hotness.
To be honest the meal was ok. The Rice didn't come out to good. It
was rice a roni, the San Francisco treat. It was a little
sticky, then again maybe they like things stick in San Francisco, I
don't know. So what does that mean, I cooked it too
long? It was rather complicated for rice. In a skillet mix the rice
and two tablespoons of butter until golden brown. They add
2 and half cups of water, bring to a boil and then turn the heat to
low cover it, simmering for 15 - 20 mins. What the hell
is simmer?
****
January 12 was a special day. Not only was it my sisters birthday but
it was also Cam Neely Night. The Bruins retired
Cam Neely's number 8 jersey. If you never saw Cam Neely play, you
missed out on one of the leagues BEST power
forwards. Neely could do it all, Score (two 50+ goal seasons), Hit,
and fight. He was a fierce competitor that gave 110%
every night, which is why Boston loved him.
His career was cut short due to injuries, but Cam continued to remain
a fixture in the community. After losing both
his parents to cancer he and his brother founded Neely House. Neely
House is a separate setting from the hospital
for cancer patients and their families to spend time together away
from the hospital.
Congratulations Cam.
****
So what is the link between Football and Erectile Dysfunction?
You see it every week on TV. A football ad plugging Levitra, the new Viagra.
Are you telling me these players wear helmets and pads but no cups?
****
For fun I like to go into the womans bathrooms and lift a couple of the seats. It gets them thinking.