(A3e2e) former homosexuals

There is a growing number of former homosexuals, former lesbians and there are individuals and groups which give support to people who have overcome homosexual addiction. Some of the links which follow are about and for such individuals or groups. ******* As of this date, 05-08-18, this folder contains 6 items. ******* item 1 ONLINE DISCUSSION GROUP ******* item 2 TWO EX-GAY STORIES ******* item 3 STAND UP FOR THE TRUTH ******* item 4 MEDIA AND MINISTRY ******* item 5 BILLBOARDS, COUNSELLORS AND EX-GAYS: LET IT SHINE ******* item 6 CANADIAN ANGLICANS REFUSE TO RECOGNIZE EX-GAYS ******************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 1 ONLINE DISCUSSION GROUP ******* Date: Tue, 21 Dec 2004 ******* From: "PFOX" ******* PFOX sponsors an e-mail discussion group at Yahoo Groups. It is comprised of parents and spouses of strugglers, and we also have ex-gays on the list. We support each other daily via e-mail. You can just read the postings or join in the discussion at any time with your particular day to day hopes and struggles. ******* If you would like to join send a blank e-mail to: [email protected] ******* To subscribe to this list of ex-gay news and views, send a blank email to: [email protected] ********************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 2 TWO EX-GAY STORIES ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Tue, 28 Dec 2004 21:53:01 +0000 ******* item 2a FIRST EX-GAY STORY ******* I am a woman who divorced my husband because I didn't want to hurt him if I had another affair with a woman. I determined "I was just gay and needed to be honest about that before God and myself" so I divorced. ******* He didn't want the divorce and deep down I really didn't want it either, I just couldn't help myself. I didn't allow God to help me either. I went to counseling with my husband for about 1 1/2 months and then left. This is such a difficult thing. Unless you've really lived it, I'm not sure you can fully understand, so others view it from the perspective that it is sin. ******* I don't consider it to be similar to something like pornography because one doesn't identify themselves in terms of a "pornographer," but w/homosexuality the big lie is it becomes "who you are". You accept the statement "I'm gay, and that's just a part of who I am". That's why it is so important in the healing process to study who you are, who God sees you to be. ******* I used to say, yes I'm gay but I'm Christian first and being gay is only a part of me. I attended an "open and affirming United Methodist church" that accepted my partner, myself, and my family with open arms. We served as Sunday school teachers, trustees, sang in the choir and on the worship team. So, what made me change from gay to straight? ******* Well, my partner had tried to have insemination but found she was in early menopause at age 28. After the trauma of that, we decided to adopt a boy from Guatemala. About 3 months prior to his arrival, she told me she was emotionally connected more to a friend of ours than to me, and the rest is history. ******* But I was having thoughts of �something is missing in the relationship� for about a year prior to that, and found myself missing men in general, not necessarily sexually, but rather a male perspective and such. ******* I was so distraught over hurting my husband and children from the divorce that I made a vow to the Lord never to leave anyone again, which is the main reason I didn't say anything to my lesbian partner. You see I had determined that I would live out my commitment to my partner regardless of how I felt. (Too bad I didn't do that in my vows in marriage, I guess I viewed this as a "second chance"). I was weak and a coward now that I look back. ******* My daughter at age 13 experienced a time of wanting to dress "trashy" so my partner and I sat her down and said we knew she wasn't gay and didn't like the fact that we were, but she didn't have to go the opposite direction with her dressing style and that we would not allow it. She did change somewhat her clothing style after that conversation. Then when my partner left, my daughter had a summer female relationship and was quite open about it. But at the close of summer she "fell in love" with a young man. She then felt horrible that she ever had the relationship with the woman who was six years older than she (much to my dismay), and quite embarrassed. She told me she thought it was wrong. ******* At that time I was talking to her and saying I knew she grew up in an openly gay home, but that I was trying to change. I told her I had no right to ask her not to pursue this life but that it would probably be filled with pain. I also told her I was there for her and would be there to talk to her and that this was a time in her life that she needed to learn to make decisions based on what she knew about God and what we had taught her through the years. She is still with that young man three years later and they plan to marry when she is finished with college. ******* My son used to call my partner his stepmother when he was younger but at around age 10 was more embarrassed with friends as to "who" she was to him. He doesn't want me to find a woman but a man to be with, and my daughter kind of goes back and forth. She just wants me to be happy and find someone to take care of me. (My daughter the social worker!) She asked me the other night, "So are you gay today or what?" I had to laugh and say "it didn't quite work that way." Then she added you need to pick one and just do it... Ah from the mouths of children? ******* Anyhow, they are both really good kids. My son is living w/his dad in the next town over because I wanted him to be with a male, namely his dad during adolescence, and to be in a larger family as he has two younger brothers and a stepmom. I am friends with my children's dad and wife, and we often get together. God has been merciful there, but when we divorced we determined not to put the kids in the middle and to try to be friendly. It's interesting that I have a better relationship w/my ex-husband and no contact w/my former partner and her child. ****** Stephanie _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ******* item 2b SECOND EX-GAY STORY ******* As an ex-gay man, I feel that the homosexual lifestyle itself is the biggest reason to change. It is the WORST lifestyle a person could ever lead. It is said, among the most experienced homosexuals, that those who are better adjusted are the ones who abandon all hope of having a life-partner, and instead settle for all they can realistically achieve: anonymous sexual encounters. Do we realize what that means? ******* The gay lifestyle reduces, on average, a person�s lifespan by more than 20 years. Even when corrected for AIDS, it is still alarming how much a person�s lifespan is reduced. ******* Study after study after study confirms the terrible levels of depression, suicide, drug abuse, and STDs prevalent in the lifestyle. And let's not even go into the bitchiness and childishness so prevalent in the gay subculture. ******* Even if one fools oneself into believing that one can avoid the depression, suicide, drug abuse, and STDs - one cannot avoid watching your friends suffer and die from such things all around you. Of course, when I say friends I should say "friends". They are only your "friends" so long as they can get what they want from you. ******* Because the gay world is like a meat market - you are only worth what you possess. Once you get really old (like, 30) you're not wanted anymore. And a the life of a fat guy, a disabled guy, or a guy with a small penis, is worth a lot less than a thin, fit, and large guy. Your personality and your personal happiness are secondary to your physical appearance. How often I have seen two gay guys deeply "in love" separate because they've found someone else fitter, or don't think the other is good-looking anymore. ******* Which brings me to gay "love". It's a myth. It doesn't exist. Anyone with the slightest bit of common sense who is in the gay world can see how often gay men break-up, and how fragile relationships are. They're totally immature. They practically move in after just meeting, and break up when they find someone better. But none of them can see this futile cycle due to their own denial and blindness to the truth that gay "love" is a mere fairytale. Infidelity is the norm in the gay world. The average relationship lasts only a year. ******* If there's one constant thing I've seen in the gay world, it's depression. And it's not caused by "oppression" or "bias" in society. It's caused by the gay "community" itself. It's a sad pathetic lifestyle that damages people. ******* RUN A MILE. Get away from it. Don't touch it. You don't need it. You're worth far more than being sucked in by and used by that selfish world. Pursue therapy, feel better, feel more masculine, have *real* male friends who actually love you for who you are, and not for what you've got that they can take. ******* And change doesn't require a religion. Most of my change took place without one, so it is possible. The strictly psychological therapy books don't include any religious things anyway, so one is free to pursue a strictly medical treatment. ******* Kind regards, ******* Simon ******* PFOX -- Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays Box 561, Fort Belvoir VA USA 22060 ******* phone 703-360-2225 ******* email [email protected] ******* web site www.pfox.org ************************************************************************************************************************ ******* item 3 STAND UP FOR THE TRUTH - by ex-gay Richard Cohen, President of PFOX ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Sun, 2 Jan 2005 ******* Let us all make a determination in 2005 to stand up and share the truth about homosexuality. Let us enlighten our family, friends, neighbors, teachers, pastors, rabbis, priests, and therapists. They won�t know unless we tell them that: No one is born with same-sex attraction and change is possible. ******* Share your personal stories. I know it�s a risk. You risk rejection. But the greater risk is that people continue to live in ignorance and sell out this country to a false paradigm, thus imprisoning the homosexual community into a life of disease and destruction. ******* We can make a difference. Let�s make a goal to share the truth about homosexuality with one person each day, or one person per week. It�s that simple. You and I can make a difference. Please do it for the sake of all those who desire freedom. They are counting on us. ******* www.comingoutstraight.com ************************************************************************************************************************ ******* item 4 MEDIA AND MINISTRY by ex-gay Randy Thomas of Exodus International ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Sun, 2 Jan 2005 ******* At one time, I was fearful of conflict and against speaking into venues that came in direct opposition with the gay-identified community. Each passing year brings deeper revelation that the Gay Elite � past and present leaders of some of the wealthiest organizations in the world � market a bill of goods that keep people trapped in a perpetual �gay� victim mentality, ungrateful for the tolerance they actually experience. Their agenda seeks to alter personal morality and public policy. After reading their materials, one will see that the Gay Elite purposefully manipulate those with same sex attraction in an effort to force them into cognitive dissonance. ******* This manufactured pressure forces people into extremes � completely for or against the gay-identified. Both extremes serve the Gay Elite by empowerment through endorsement or empowering the victim mentality. When I realized the gay activist agenda was a manipulative trap, I went from being a pacifist in the culture war to an activist for Christ. I went back to the closet and found that it never truly existed. Do not be fooled, the Gay Elite bring oppression in the name of being oppressed. True freedom is the person�s right to self-determine their identity and sexual stewardship. ******* Exodus offers informed options to live life beyond homosexuality; to live a life that honors Christ. Our message is clear and we respect self-determination. We do not seek to convert or �cure� but to inform and educate. For over two thousand years, people have chosen whether or not to follow Christ. Like Him, we will continue to love and honor each individual and his or her choice. ******* Silence is not an option if we want to enjoy self-determination and religious expression. These two democratic pillars are also at the foundation of what it means to turn to Christ; we make a free will decision to follow Him and share with others what we have learned. If the Gay Elite will take every opportunity to uphold their version of faith and morality, why are we silent? The time is now. Speak out, stand up and be counted. ******* PFOX -- Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays Box 561, Fort Belvoir VA 22060 703-360-2225 [email protected] - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - To subscribe to this list of ex-gay news and views, send a blank email to: [email protected] ************************************************************************************************************************ ******* item 5 BILLBOARDS, COUNSELLORS AND EX-GAYS: LET IT SHINE ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Sun, 20 Feb 2005 ******* By Warren Throckmorton, PhD ******* Recently controversy has erupted in Rockville, Maryland and Houston, Texas over billboard advertising concerning the right of people to seek change in homosexuality. The Rockville billboard sponsored by Parents and Friends of Ex-gays and Gays (PFOX) shows the picture of a young man with the caption: "Ex-gays prove change is possible." The Houston billboards were backed by Exodus International and contain similar messages. Predictably, homosexual activists have been swift to denounce them. ******* In a recent Washington Times article, Dan Furmansky, executive director of Equality Maryland is quoted saying, "If it wasn't so sad that people are spending so much money, energy and time that could be used on something constructive, like dealing with tsunami victims, it would be ludicrous." I wonder if Mr. Furmansky would take kindly to a similar suggestion that he donate his organization's budget to the tsunami relief effort. ******* To be sure, change in sexuality is nearly as controversial as gay marriage or what to teach about homosexuality in schools. Organizations such as the National Mental Health Association have suggested that all such efforts are harmful, saying in their brochure, What Does Gay Mean?, "�attempts "cure" lesbians and gay men may help change sexual behavior temporarily but will also create emotional trauma." Despite research to the contrary, groups such as the NMHA routinely make these pronouncements. ******** On the other hand, a major mental health organization, the American Counseling Association (ACA) recently went on record to defend the right of people to determine whether or not they should seek change. Based in Alexandria, VA, the ACA along with its divisions represents the interests of professionals ranging from school to career counselors. ******* In reply to a question from Rev. D. L. Foster of Atlanta GA, Larry T. Freeman, MA, LPC, Manager, Ethics and Professional Standards for the ACA affirmed a client's right to self-determination as it relates to seeking counseling to change sexual identity. Pastor Foster asked the ACA in a letter: "I am interested to know if the ACA's Code of Ethics A.2.B is applicable to clients who seek to change their sexual orientation from homosexual to heterosexual." ******* Mr. Freeman's verbatim response is as follows: "In response to your inquiry below regarding whether Section A.2. Respecting Diversity. b. Respecting Differences; is applicable to clients who seek to change their sexual orientation. Yes, this code applies to any one who feels or perceives themselves as struggling with an issue that impacts negatively the quality and comfort of their daily life. The key word here is client, it is the client that approaches the counselor and gives consent to be treated. If one's sexual orientation is not an issue to them, it should not be an issue for the counselor. However, if it is, then the person(s) should have the freedom of choice to seek appropriate treatment for it; what ever the issue(s) may be. If what the client is experiencing is not in the training or education of the counselor a referral is suggested to the client, so they can receive the proper treatment that meets their counseling needs." ******* When I asked Rev. Foster how he viewed the ACA statement, he said, "As a Pastor and one who has experienced satisfying change in my own sexual orientation, I welcome this wise and balanced response which truly values diversity and a client's right to self determination." ******* However, I have talked to colleagues who have asked, in effect, what is the big deal here? Why does it matter what the ACA says? Why do ex-gays have to put up billboards? And why go by the identity ex-gay? People are not ex-liberals, they are conservatives, right? ******* My answer is that no one disputes the existence of ex-liberals, or even ex-Michael Moore fans. However, the very existence of ex-gays is routinely and systematically denied by gay activists and often those in the mental health professions. The term ex-gay denotes a process of transformation maligned and doubted by many. That is why the ACA statement is so encouraging to them. ******* On this point, Rev. Foster said, "It is gratifying to know that struggling men and women seeking changes to sexual feelings won't be relegated to second class status in the mental health field simply because they want to live happier, fulfilling lives." ******* Many ex-gays are recognizing that the only way to get the message out about their own existence is to become increasingly vocal and visible. The more the gay activist community denies their existence, the more public they will become. ******* Ex-gays such as Rev. Foster are taking seriously the song learned as kids: "This little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine. Hide it under a bushel? No! I'm going to let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine." --------------------------------------------------------------------- Columnist Warren Throckmorton, PhD is Associate Professor of Psychology at Grove City College (PA). His columns have been published in over 60 newspapers. He is the producer of the documentary, I Do Exist concerning sexual orientation change (www.idoexist.com ). ******* A copy of this article is available online at: http://www.pfox.org/asp/newsman/templates/newstemplate.asp? articleid=203&zoneid=8 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - To subscribe to this list of ex-gay news and views, send a blank email to: [email protected] ************************************************************************************************************************ ******* item 6 CANADIAN ANGLICANS REFUSE TO RECOGNIZE EX-GAYS ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Tue, 29 Jun 2004 ******* Canadian Anglican General Synod Refuses to Recognize Ex-Gays ******* ST. CATHARINES, Ontario, June 4, 2004 (LifeSiteNews.com) - The Anglican General Synod voted Thursday to amend a motion on same-sex blessings to include a consultation on the experiences of gay and lesbian people. However, a motion to amend this to also include "ex-gays and lesbians" was defeated. ******* In a livejournal.com commentary, Peter Ould, himself an "ex-gay," expresses his outrage. Since the American Psychiatric Association (APA) voted to remove homosexuality as a disorder from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) 30 years ago, Ould argues, "no evidence has emerged that there is a substantive biological, genetic or chemical basis to homosexual attraction." ******* "This has not stopped the gay lobby promulgating both the fallacious 'One in Ten' assertion and equally the notion that you are 'Born Gay' (a notion for which there is no scientific evidence to this day)," Ould contends. ******* Ould claims the motivation behind the Anglican synod's decision to exclude ex-gays was to forward a political ideal. "The motion before Canadian General Synod was apparently framed in an atmosphere of inclusion and pastoral affection," he writes. But, "by voting down the ex-gay amendment, they demonstrated that this motion had nothing to do with listening, nothing to do with rescuing minorities and very little to do with freedom and respect," Ould asserts. He describes the decision to exclude "ex-gays" as "a front for political agendas." ******* In his cynical conclusion, Ould writes, "Congratulations Canadian General Synod . . . you just demonstrated not only the power (or absence) of the Spirit of Christ within you but also the truth of the love behind the liberal wing. God Bless the Anglican Church of Canada, because nobody else can help you now." ******* + + + PFOX -- Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays, Box 561, Fort Belvoir VA 22060, 703-360-2225 ******* [email protected] www.pfox.org ******* To subscribe to this list, send a blank email to: [email protected] ************************************************************************************************************************ ************************************************************************************************************************

Links to other sites on the Web

(A3e2e1) defending ex-gays
(A3e2e2) Exodus - Catholic organization for reforming homosexuals
(A3e2e3) Coming Out Straight
(A3e2e4) Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays and Gays
(A3e2e5) Stephen Bennet Ministries
(A3e2e6) (A) home page

The following warning is a prophetic message given to me, Frank Wagner, in November of 1974. ******* LISTEN TO THE CRY OF THE ABORTED CHILDREN. THEIR CRY IS NO. THEIR CRY IS A CRY OF TERROR. HEED THEIR CRY. ******* This prophecy is now being fulfilled. ******* For details about the source, meaning and fulfillment of this prophetic message go to ******* http://ca.geocities.com/fwagner4/index.html ******* email me at *** [email protected] ***