| FUTURAMA CUTS � SEASON 2 17: ANTHOLOGY OF INTEREST I C4 PREMIERE = OCT./NOV. 2001, OR EARLY APR. 2002 uncut premiere = 03.05.03, 03:00 THE ONE WHERE Professor creates the Fing-Longer, which helps someone operate machinery at long distances. He�s also made a What-If Machine � ask a what-if question and it generates a video simulation answer. It�s just not very long. So, we see three What-Ifs in this episode: 1. What if Bender was 500 ft tall and weighed 7 bn tons? 2. What if Leela was a little more impulsive? 3. What if Fry had never come to the future? -------------------- DEFINITE CUTS POSSIBLE CUTS I never saw this episode on C4 � in fact, until recently I thought it had been banned. But Aslate on Peel saw it and listed some cuts, so major credit is due there. All those cuts are in red. There were a few things in the huge-Bender segment which would probably have been cut, then the second, when Leela butchers practically all of PX, C4 have butchered the episode! It�s horribly ironic, I know. The third wasn't greatly offensive, unless you're Al Gore perhaps. -------------------- FIRST WHAT-IF: I don�t reckon the censors would have liked BENDER Bite my colossal metal ass! or his reference to nude beaches as he asks the what-if question. And there were a few objectionable bits: Bender�s ass-propulasion system, the 4000 deaths at the Hanson concert and Zoidberg eating a guinea pig alive; but I don�t see how the story could have progressed without them. -------------------- SECOND WHAT-IF: In this episode Leela sees how it would be if she were more impulsive� as it turns out, she would murder everyone to get her way. Professor has just told Leela that she�ll inherit his vast fortune after he dies. Seeing a chance to speed up the process, Leela kicks the Professor into his pit full of man-eating anteaters: PROFESSOR (as he�s attacked by the anteaters) Oh, you�ve killed me, you�ve killed me! LEELA Oh my God, what have I done? PROFESSOR I just told you, you�ve killed me! (the anteaters finish with Professor, leaving just his skeleton, coat and glasses, which one anteater coughs up) -------------------- Hermes finds out that Leela was the murderer. With no one else around, Leela kills Hermes too! Zoidberg, meanwhile, is looking for clues, while behind his back Leela grabs the emergency axe and goes back to Hermes: HERMES (from other room) What are you hacking off?! Is it my torso? It is!! My precious torso!!! [overdubbed with silence, to make the next line pointless] ZOIDBERG (shouting to other room) Hermes, quiet! I�m deducing things! -------------------- Bender finds out about Leela�s murders, but blackmails her (actually, he prefers the word �extortion�. The X makes it sound cool). So she kills him with the microwave, then resolves to stop killing. But after Amy makes a disparaging remark, she just can�t resist one more. -------------------- Then, �detective� Zoidberg gathers everyone else (Fry, Leela, Scruffy, Cubert and Nibbler) together to gradually solve the mystery. But whenever anyone is on the verge of naming her, Leela switches off the lights and kills them � Scruffy, Cubert, Nibbler and Zoidberg all die this way [and I don�t know how they could show someone with a spear through their heart on a �kids�� show]. -------------------- Afterwards, Fry (eventually) works out that Leela did it. And to make sure Fry won�t talk, Leela seduces him. LEELA So Fry, what do you think of the impulsive new me? FRY I like it! LEELA Good. Now let me just get the lights� (switches them off) FRY Aaaaaaaaaaaargh!! � � I really like it! But the censors didn't... Not until May 2003, anyway, when they showed AOI I uncut! Huzzahs are in order. |
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