inside
story
EarthBound 200X
Scene Commentary by Flying Zamboni 2
Note: This commentary contains spoilers
The Return
"I can answer your questions, young man. You are in Dalaam. The year is 200X, one year after the defeat of the Cosmic Destroyer."
"Dalaam...how did I get here?"
"Your machine was found outside. It crashed into one of our golden elephants at the palace gates. You were brought in here, treated and have since slept for three days."
"I see...heh your prince doesn't happen to be here does he?"
"I'm afraid not he has gone on a vacation in Onett. He has left me in charge."
"Excellent!" With that Pokey stood up and shot the old man with a laser in his back pocket.
He then pulled out a small device and pressed a button on it. A blinding beam of light filled the room and when it dissapeared, Pokey stood looking exactly as the old man.
EB 200X has been an idea that has changed drastically from when it was first conceived. Originally it was going to be a PK Hack game though I soon realized that I sucked at PK Hack and moved on to fanfiction. Being very young and completely unskilled in writing (sadly me grammar has not improved much since that time) I wrote up a first chapter that was barely a page in length. The original plot was completely different from the current one and involved Giygas's brother coming to Earth for revenge. I scrapped that idea and didn't write anything for about two years. After improving a bit as a writer, I decided to give fanfiction another go and wrote the prologue of EB 200X as you know it today. After Chapter 1, I decided that I wasn't terribly proud of what I'd written and forgot about the story for quite some time, at least half a year. Then one day I looked on EFR and saw the positive review for the first two installments. I was thrilled and decided to continue the story. I really do have to thank you for that, James, without that review I may never have decided to continue writing the story.
Although many things have been changed throughout the course of EB 200X's writing, the one constant factor has been Pokey's plan for world domination/vengeance. Its progression in the story presented is pretty much exactly like I originally intended. You may think that all of Pokey's plans have been revealed, but I've still got one more big one for the next and final chapter.
Stopping Cain
"I was hoping to torment you longer, but I guess I'll just have to kill you now!" Cain pulled the trigger only to find his hand solidified in ice. To his horror, the ice began to spread up his arm. He turned his head and looked out the window to see Paula, no longer having to hold the bullet, with two of her fingers pointed at him.
"You! You did this! I swear I will have my vengeance Miss Polestar! Just...you...wait." He said as the ice finished solidifying his body.
Off in the distance, a tall figure sat in the shadows, watching the whole thing. When it was over, the figure stood up, smiled, and teleported away.
Cain is by far the most fun character to write for. I know that sounds sick considering that he's a sadistic madman, but I still think that it's fun to write crazy person lines. Cain is a combination of just about every major villain I could think of that defined "insane." There's a lot of Randall Flagg from Stephen King novels, also a bit of Hannibal Lechter, and even a tiny amount of inspiration from one of the bad guys in the show "Big O." Cain really boils down to a serial killer with psychic powers. He also has huge ego issues, as seen by the fact that he wigs out whenever anyone crosses him. More on him later.
Chosen Four vs. Koga
Koga quickly stiffened his right arm and a small throwing star slid out from under his sleave and into his open hand. He flicked his wrist with an almost unseeable speed and Ness was stopped mid-air as the throwing star embedded itself into his left shoulder. Koga rushed at the downed Ness and raised his scythe above his head to strike the final blow. He screamed in pain suddenly and fell to his knees. With Koga on the ground Ness could see Jeff standing with the mouth of his laser lazily sending curls of smoke into the air from the recent firing. Koga turned swifly on his knees only to be met with Paula's frying pan flying at his face. He quickly stuck his arm out in a block and surrounded it with a psychic shield. Paula stumbled backwards as the blow was deflected and Koga quickly jumped up and flipped backwards, landing next to a high rock wall.
This was the first major action sequence in EB 200X. I love writing action scenes and this one was no exception. I usually try acting out various movements in my head and some of them in front of a mirror (when no one's around) before writing them out. I sit down and know how the sequence will begin and end, but I most often think of most of the middle parts on the fly. I try and look at the fight from a third-person view and think to myself, "Okay, this guy just did this, now what options does the other guy have for retaliation?"
As far as the character of Koga is concerned, he was my first attempt at an emotionally complex character in the story and I'm fairly happy with the way he's turned out. The only thing that I'd change about him would be his name. I'm terrible when it comes to names and when I was trying to think of his name, "Koga" just popped in my head. The only problem is that it is also the name of a character in the crappy show "Inuyasha." I hate that show very much and the name only reminds me of it.
Retaliation
But she was too angry to listen to him. "WHERE IS HE?! I'LL KILL HIM!" Some of the above floor gave way and fell directly at them. Ness jumped back and the large pile of former floor and wall separated him from Paula. Paula, meanwhile, psychically pushed the falling debris away from herself without even glancing back at Ness. She continued to charge forward and hurled herself through some double doors and into a burning room with a clear area in the middle where no fire was. She wasn't surprised to see Cain sitting on the floor wearily rubbing his head. She looked up and smiled when she saw that he had gone through every floor on his way down. He may have been able to soften his fall, but his luck wouldn't last much longer if Paula had anything to say about it.
I felt bad about killing off Paula's parents and most of Twoson, I really did, but it was necessary to show just how evil Cain really is. This entire sequence also serves the purpose of showing the change in Paula (more on that a little later). A major theme that I'm trying to show in this story is the idea of dealing with feelings of revenge and anger. Paula deals with her anger in a productive way. She has every right to be ****** at Cain but only uses her anger as a means of stopping his evil in the future. I guess you could say that Paula is a foil for Halibur.
Memories
She was four and it was night. The door opened with a slight creak and the outline of her father could be seen shooting upright in the bed that looked about twenty feet wide to her four year old eyes. Paula ran over to him crying. Her mother was up now too and they were both hugging her and making calming "shhh" noises.
"What's wrong dear?" Her mother said quietly.
"I-I had a dream where I woke up and you guys weren't here!" She broke out into sobs again.
"Shhh," Her mother began to stroke her hair reassuringly. "It's okay, honey. We'll be here for a long, long, time. Everything will be alright."
"A-Are you s-sure?"
"We promise."
Tears were forming in Paula's eyes now as she kneeled next to the burnt bed and picked up a slightly charred picture of her mother and father standing on the front lawn holding the cat and smiling. The tears began to flow freely and she broke out into sobs.
Four minutes later Ness came into the room and walked over to her. He knelt down next to her and hugged her. "Shhh, everything will be alright."
"T-They can't be gone. They said they'd never leave me..."
"Shhh. It's alright, I'm still here, Paula. I won't leave you."
I lost my grandmother to cancer a couple of years before writing this, so the memories of what it's like to lose someone are still quite strong in my mind. Brief flashes of all the good times you had with that person just pop into your mind's eye. In Paula's case she remembers all of the comfort that her parents gave her. This moment also shows how important Ness is to Paula, something that will be very important later in the story.
A Brief Showdown
Poo and Jeff stood up and fired Starstorm and laser blasts respectively. Ness let loose a steady stream of PSI Rockin' and turned his head toward the crowd gathered along the wall. "Get out now! Run!" They did.
Cain screamed in frustration and his shield shattered, sending all four forces colliding into his body at once. He let out a pained shriek as he fell to the ground, tendrils of smoke rose from his clothes. Paula gave what could best be described as a war cry as she charged at the fallen psychic. She swiftly kicked him in his side and then grabbed him by the collar, hoisted him up to her eye level and began to punch him in the face. Tears of rage began to run down her face and she continued until Cain's eyes shot open. He screamed, half in anger and half in pain, and psychically sent Paula flying across the room. His shield regenerated and he levitated up to the ceiling. He punched his fist straight up into thin air and the roof of the church tore itself free and shot into the sky. He opened his fist and it stopped, levitated in mid-air. Cain grinned insanely and clapped his hands above his head; the former roof shattered and became many small chunks suspended in mid-air. He snapped his fingers and the debris began to fall.
At this moment Everdred kicked open the doors of the church and stormed in wielding a large shotgun taken from his police car. He pumped it and fired at Cain.
Along with writing his dialogue, I also enjoy writing Cain's action sequences. It's a different experience to write out invisible forces pushing other people into walls and chairs flying around the room and whatnot as opposed to two guys kicking each other. Cain's past (and future) fight scenes are largely influenced by, as nerdy as this sounds, Star Wars. Star Wars mixes hand to hand combat with the invisible powers of the force, something that is very similar to what I'm going for with the psychic battles of EB 200X.
This scene shows that Cain's powers are rapidly evolving. Ness's PSI Flash ceases to have an effect on him and his shield has gotten remarkably strong.
Thinking back, I really don't know why I decided to make Everdred a cop, it just seemed like the right thing to do.
On A Short Leash
"Stupid kids, I'll get them for this. But what else can I do to torment her? I've already destroyed Twoson and ruined her chance of making peace at her parent's funeral... THE BOY!" He stood up quickly, "I'll kill the one in the red hat! Oh this should be fun!"
"Not now." Cain turned quickly and drew his gun, pointing at the source of the mysterious voice at the mouth of the cave. He sighed with relief and put the gun away when he saw that it was Koga.
"Oho? So what does my mysterious benefactor want with me?" Cain asked in a bemused tone.
A look of disgust crossed over Koga's face as he spoke. "Make no mistake Monster, I'm not doing this for you or my master's benefit. He sent me to tell you that you are to render your services unto him from this moment forward. He says that you are not yet strong enough to do what he intends of you to your fullest ability."
"And if I refuse?"
Koga pulled out the small device that looked exactly like the one that Cain had used to gain his powers. He pressed the red button and a yellow light enveloped Cain. He clutched his sides in pain and began to scream in pain.
I should have just replaced this entire scene with a big red neon sign that read "FORESHADOWING!" Although in all honesty I'm not sure to what extent I want Cain's reluctance to have a master to have on Pokey's plans.
Agraj and Rashal
"With all due respect, sir, it is in the best interest of our king to investigate any and all suspicious activity that could be detrimental to the future of the country! As the second in command I should not have to be telling this to my captain!"
Anger falshed across Agraj's face. "Very well, assemble the rest of the Royal Guard. Leave me now while I change into my armor."
Rashal bowed again and turned to leave when the Captain spoke. "Oh, and, Rashal?"
Rashal turned. "Yes sir?"
"Might I remind you to remember your place in the future."
"...Yes, my Captain."
I was trying to make it seem that Agraj was the one who was in on Pokey's plans, but really he's just gotten lazy with years of having nothing to do. It's his own apathy that leads to his downfall.
Conspiracy
Pokey turned to Agraj. "You see, I've been paying every robotics corporation I could get into contact with to lend me the parts I needed to make these Starmen. I had to make the first one by hand, but then that one made these machines that mass produce the rest of them."
Agraj whimpered. "'Rest of them?'"
"Oh, how silly of me to forget." Pokey turned to the sharply dressed man. "Cain, hit the lights."
Cain walked over to a nearby switch and flipped it. To the left, a previously dark section of the cave lit up and revealed row after row of hundreds of gleaming Starmen.
Pokey spoke again. "And the great thing about these things is that they don't need transport ships to get to the surface, they can teleport! Isn't alien technology neat?"
Agraj finally began to regain his senses. "Wait! Where did you get the money to do this?"
"The king gave it to me."
"That's absurd! The king would never approve of the building of an invasion force! For that matter, who are you? I've never seen you anywhere in the castle, much less near the king!"
"I am Pokey Minch, former minion of Giygas, King of Dalaam, and future ruler of this world! What's it to you, Pig's Butt?"
And finally Pokey's plan is revealed. The hardest part of this chapter was writing the description for the Starmen, I was trying to describe them as if talking to someone who had never played the game before. It was much harder than I thought it would be. This scene also shows that no matter how smart Pokey gets, he can't go long without insulting someone.
Betrayal
Rashal stepped forward and stood next to Pokey, his hands on his two katanas at his sides. "We won't take orders from you anymore. I'm taking control of the Guard from now on." He snapped his fingers and the other nine members of the Royal Guard stepped forward and stood at attention next to Rashal.
Agraj said in a shocked voice. "You had this planned the whole time didn't you Rashal? Then why even take me to this cave? Why not just kill me in my sleep?"
"It was a test. Originally, the plan was to offer you a choice, join Pokey, or die. But I wanted to see if you were even worthy of being leader of the Guard. And after not coming to investigate this cave from sheer laziness and then walking into an obvious trap, I have found you unfit to continue serving the throne."
Agraj was angry now. "HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME OF BETRAYING THE THRONE!"
Rashal is an example of a zealot in a position of power. He is quick to judge others yet unwilling to look at his own actions. He is also very charismatic. How else would he be able to persuade all nine members of the Royal Guard to turn on the country? Rashal is the type of person that throws himself completely into whatever it is he is doing.
Agraj vs. Rashal
He quickly batted away Koga's scythe and charge at Rashal with spear at the ready before Koga could do anything. He swung the spear at his former second in command only to hit air as Rashal rolled under the blow and stood up behind him. Rashal drew his twin katanas and stabbed at Agraj. The Captain of the Guard quickly swung his spear behind him and deflected the blow while turning around. While Rashal was off balance, Agraj quickly thrust his spear at him. He responded by jumping lightly into the air and landing on the flat side of the spear. Rashal jumped again and delivered a spinning kick to the side of Agraj's head. Agraj flew into the ground and accidentaly threw his spear a few feet away. The Captain stood up just in time to see Rashal swinging one of his katanas at him. He jumped back and avoided it but was caught off guard when Rashal swung his second katana and cut through his armour and across his stomach. Pokey snorted with laughter at this.
Rashal neared him and raised both of his katanas above his head to deliver the killing blow. Agraj rolled away at the last second and wearily stood up. He looked to his right and saw the entrance to another tunnel. Clutching his stomach he darted off and into the dark tunnel.
Pokey turned to Koga. "Go after him. We don't want that pig's butt to blab."
I wanted this fight to be short, but clearly establish that Rashal had the upper hand. I mean, Agraj doesn't even land a single blow. I guess I didn't realize it until just now, but Agraj really got screwed over in the story. Halibur almost kills him, he winds up being a terrible leader and then his whole team betrays him, and to top it all off he gets killed by his second-in-command after losing very badly in a fight. I can't help but feel sorry for the guy.
Leo and Renault
"And what do you intend to do with this child?"
"He has no living relatives sire, and I've always wanted a son so I th-"
Leo glared at him sharply and spoke sternly. "And you intended to adopt him as your own and allow a servant's child into the royal court of Dalaam!"
Renault returned Leo's sharp glare. "Yes m'lord. Do I have your permission?"
Leo glared at him a moment longer and then broke into a broad, friendly grin and finally a warm and musical laugh. "Of course you do, old friend! You've always been such a kind person. I'll gladly welcome the boy into the castle! What is the little fellow's name?"
Renault smiled as he said. "Before she died, Rose said that his name was Poo."
I love having written Koga and Poo's back story, but coming up with it was an extremely long process. Ever since I wrote the prologue, the idea for the Dalaam civil war was fermenting in my mind. It started off as a very small back story in which Poo was Koga's cousin and Leo was killed in some random war, prompting Koga and Kara to leave the country out of grief. Then the story started to grow a bit more each time I thought about it. It was like trying to think up a completely different story while still writing this one. The back story presented in Chapter 7 was not completely planned out until I had written about half of it.
The idea for Renault's character developed when I decided that the story needed a more dramatic pull. I really tried to make both Leo and Renault characters that readers would like. I decided to make Poo adopted for two reasons:
1) I wanted to give Halibur a reason to really loath him and
2) I didn't want to go with the "main character has a brother that you've never heard of before" route.
Modernizing Dalaam
"But that doesn't change the fact that the overall standard of living is much poorer compared to other countries such as Eagleland!"
"My people seem content as they are."
Renault began to show signs of anger. "Of course they are because you haven't given them a chance to experience anything other than what they have now!"
The king finally turned from the scythe and to his advisor, "Renault, I have always valued your advice and your friendship but on this matter I'm afraid that my word is final!"
"I will not sit idly by while the people are forced to live in run down shacks because their king is too caught up in tradition to care about them! As long as your blood line is allowed to rule then the people will continue to live in poverty!"
Silence fell between the two men. Finally, King Leo spoke calmly, "Renault, how long have you been in my service?"
"Twenty-one years, Leo."
"Ah yes, since the very beginning. That's a long time..." Leo turned and gazed once again at the Scythe of Kings.
"Yeah. All good things must come to an end, right?"
"Right."
I had the hardest time thinking of an issue for Renault and Leo to fight over. I wanted to go with something that would fit the country of Dalaam, yet also be something that the reader could see where Renault was coming from.
Family Ties
Prince Halibur, dressed in gleaming blue armor, strode through the doors and approached his father's throne. He gave a swift bow and spoke. "Father, Renault's forces have taken half of the land territory and are trying to advance further. Fortunately General Agraj and I were able to cut off his troops with our own."
Just outside the throne room's closed doors stood two young boys. Koga, now twelve, had his ear against the doors and was desperately trying to listen to his brother's report while Poo, now ten, stood next to him eagerly.
"Koga, what are they saying?" Poo whispered.
"Shh! I can't hear it if you're talking!"
Suddenly a small voice spoke from behind them. "Hey, didn't father tell you two to stop eavesdropping?"
The two boys jumped and turned to see the small figure of Kara standing a few feet away. Koga quickly tried to cover up his disobedience. "Erm, we weren't listening in Kara! Honest! We were just, um..."
"Cleaning the doors!" Interrupted Poo with a pathetic excuse for a lie.
Kara only sighed. "You know father doesn't want us to have any involvement in the war! I don't want you guys involved in any way."
Not much to say about this except that Koga, Kara, and Poo all have a bond equal to that of siblings. Also, Poo is a very bad liar.
Eddie
Renault's army was an odd assortment of traditional Dalaameese weapons and modern day technology. Many men held swords and spears while others held pistols and machine guns. Scattered among the many horses were a few run down jeeps. It was in one of these jeeps that Renault sat next to a non-Dalaameese man who was dressed in a flowery t-shirt and shorts, wearing sandals and a pair of cheap sunglasses.
Renault glanced at him. "The battle is going to start soon. It is very likely that this will be the end, thank you for your services in this war, Eddie."
Eddie grinned. "Hey boss, it's what you pay me for man."
Renault chuckled. "Even so, your skill in battle is amazing."
Eddie gave a smile that tried its best to look modest but failed miserably. "They don't call Red Eddie the best in the biz for kicks and giggles, baby!" Eddie gave a thumbs up and looked ahead. "Well it looks like that king guy's ready for action. Ciao!"
Eddie is my favorite bit character in EB 200X. He's sort of a tribute to the type of gangsters that you see in movies like Pulp Fiction. I originally had a big fight scene in mind between him and Halibur, but I decided that it might be a little much considering everything else that happens in Chapter 7. I like to think of Eddie as one of those nameless henchmen who appears in most action movies for a few seconds and does something cool and memorable before being killed off by the main character. Like the sword guy who Indiana Jones shoots in Raiders of the Lost Ark. I still wish that I'd kept him around a little longer though...
Dalaam vs. Renault's Forces
King Leo and Halibur had arrived and now stood next to General Agraj as they faced the remainder of Dalaam's army. The king raised his scythe into the air. "You have all fought well and for a noble cause. You men have all made me honored to be your king. Today will be the end of this civil war, may we ride into glory!"
The army cheered. Agraj gave the signal to charge. Renault's army prepared themselves for the oncoming wave of soldiers. The end of an age had begun.
This sequence was my first attempt at writing a massive battle between two armies. I had fun writing it, but it was hard finding a reasonable amount of technology that Renault would have access to.
Two Friends
Renault scoffed. "And if I surrender, what then? Just a few days of prison and then execution!"
"That is what the law dictates in regard to high treason."
"Then change the law! You're the king!"
"That would be an abuse of power. I'm sorry."
"I don't suppose that you'll let me run away will you?"
"No, I'm sorry; if I let you run then I'd have to abdicate the throne out of shame. As king I must fulfill my duty to my country."
"I understand. Let's finish it."
Leo visibly relaxed. "Yes, I'm ready."
"Everything I've done was for the good of Dalaam..."
"As did I. Old friend."
And the moral of the story, ladies and gentlemen, is that war is hell. Renault is forced to either choose between his life, or his best friend's. He chooses his own and it is the guilt that comes with that decision that causes him to hide out in that cave later in the story.
Halibur Unleashed
"I don't need your protection! Where were you when my father was being killed? You are clearly incapable of protecting anyone!"
Agraj's eyes narrowed. "Where was I? Where were you!"
Halibur's eyes flashed and his nostrils flared, he let out a scream and kicked Agraj in the stomach. "How dare you!" he kicked again, "How dare you!"
Agraj was curled up on the ground now gasping for breath. Halibur wound his leg back for another kick. The king didn't notice Koga until he had punched him in the right cheek.
Halibur staggered back and stared at Koga in shock. Kara and Poo were next to him and had their fists risen in case he tried a retaliatory blow.
Koga reprimanded him as a parent does a child. "What do you think that you are doing?"
"You heard what he said to me!"
"I don't care! You insulted him first; honorable men do not treat other people like this!"
Halibur took a step forward. "What would you know about honor, you little idiot!"
With Halibur, I wanted to go with a guy who doesn't become an antihero when something bad happens to him, he just loses it. He's understandably upset, but he handles it in the worst possible ways. I tried writing him as juvenile as possible, hence the temper tantrums and name-calling.
I would also like to add that the hardest part about typing his name was to not accidentally spell out "halibut," something I've already done numerous times throughout the course of this commentary.
The Confrontation
There was the familiar "crack" of someone finishing a teleport. He opened his eyes to see Halibur standing in the cave entrance, smiling. The boy drew his sword.
"Hello, Traitor, I'm here to kill you."
Renault sighed. "I'd rather you arrest me first."
"Why's that? Afraid of Hell?"
Renault coughed and shook his head. "No, no. I just want to be taken back to Dalaam. I want to see my country one last time before I die."
Halibur snarled, leaped over to the sitting man and kicked him. He then bent down, picked him up, and threw him out of the cave. Renault tried to stand but collapsed again in a coughing fit.
I was originally going to have Halibur and Renault kill each other in a fight, but then decided against it. I opted instead to have Renault completely give up on life and ask for mercy, only to have Halibur slaughter him. Who is the real villain?
Judgment
"Star Master, what are yo--" He was cut off by a swift punch that sent him into the ground. Halibur looked up at his old mentor, shocked.
Star Master spoke with a voice filled with anger, "You fool! Did you think that I would not see what you have done?"
"What business is it of yours?"
"I have watched over the royal line for generations! Have you forgotten that I am the guardian of the royal house? Did you not think that I would be watching you? I have seen the way you have handled both your enemies and your own family. This manner is unfit for one of my former pupils, let alone a king! I hereby deem you unfit to rule. Your title has been revoked."
Halibur was up at once, hand on his sword hilt. "How dare you speak to your king that way!"
I thought that it was more fitting if Halibur went out due to his own pride and conceit than in a battle to the death. Halibur was much worse for Dalaam than Renault could have ever been.
The Next King
Koga sighed. "I don't want this responsibility yet Poo. I'm no good at making decisions."
"Stop talking like that! You will make a great leader and you know it!"
Koga and Kara were silent for a moment. Suddenly, Koga spoke, "I'm afraid. After what happened to father and Halibur, I'm afraid of what might happen to Kara and me."
Poo considered this for a moment. "I understand Koga. Kara, you feel the same way?"
Kara nodded. "Koga's all that I've got left."
"When are you going?"
Koga stood up. "Now. We just wanted to tell you first."
Poo suddenly got an idea, "Wait here one second!"
He quietly left the room for a moment. When he returned he was holding the Scythe of Kings. He handed it to Koga. "Take this, it belongs to you."
Koga smiled and hugged his friend, "Goodbye Poo."
"Goodbye."
Kara did the same and then the two siblings left the room and the country.
The only thing that I want to say about this part is that Poo has always viewed Koga as the rightful heir to the throne and has just been waiting for him to return.
Exposing Dalaam...Almost
With a triumphant smile, Francis finished entering the last password. He quickly copied the file and attached it to an email that was to be sent to every major news outlet in the country. He grabbed the mouse and reached for the "send" button.
The power went out. The sound of the door being flung open could be heard through the darkness. The lights suddenly flared back on seconds later.
A tall Dalaamese man in golden armor was crouched on Francis's desk. The man had two katana's drawn and crossed in front of him so that they formed a deadly metal "x", the crux of which was right against the quivering business man's neck. Francis looked at the guards, all of them wavered for a moment and then slumped to the ground, dead. Francis glanced at this computer. His hope was crushed when he saw that the brief cut in the power by his assassins had completely shut down the machine and erased it all.
At last, the assassin spoke. "As captain of the Dalaam Royal Assassin Squad I, Rashal, hearby sentence you to death."
Amazingly enough, Francis was able to speak through his terror. "I give you weapons and technology and this is how you pay me?"
It was extremely satisfying to write this scene. I've had the basic concept of this sequence in my head for a couple of years; I just could never find the right story to put it in. I should also note that at this point in the story, Rashal has thrown himself completely into his new job as an assassin in order to hide his guilt for killing Agraj and many others.
Dishonorable
"Look at what we've been reduced to since the new master took over? We used to be the king's most trusted men and now we're capturing children! Children, Rashal!"
Rashal spoke in an even tone. "I beg you to reconsider your position."
Gorj flung his arms into the air and began to walk away. "This is dishonourable! Agraj would never have--"
Rashal's face twisted in anger as he grabbed Gorj by the arm and flung him to the ground. He loomed over the gaurd and grabbed him by the neck.
"Don't you ever mention that name to me again! He was a traitor to the country! Never quesiton my actions on the matter or I will kill you! Understand? Kill you!"
Gorj managed a sneer. "Feeling guilty?"
Rashal twitched the wrist attached to the hand around Gorj's neck and a small blade shot out. Gorj's legs twitched for a moment before he stopped moving alltogether. One of the hostages began to cry.
Jeff gasped in alarm while Paula seemed unphased.
This scene serves to show that Rashal's guilt is eating away at him on the inside and that not all of the Royal Guards are with him. It's sort of an "I didn�t sign up for this" mentality. This also shows how Paula is changing, although really, if you saw your mother killed in front of you it would take a lot to phase you.
Poo vs. Jin
Jin grabbed the chain and swung it toward Poo. Poo, sword drawn, leap above the spearhead and toward his former ally. Jin quickly swung his arm upward and hit Poo's legs with the chain, causing him to lose balance and spin into the ground. Jin retracted his weapon quickly and Poo just barely avoided the blade. Jin shortened the chain length and spun it above his head before slamming it into the ground towards Poo. Poo deflected the blade with his sword and then lept away as Jin recovered and swung toward him again.
The young prince landed and began to run to the opposite end of the room. Jin flung his weapon out after him. The blade came inches away from Poo's back before he backflipped into the air.
This is my favorite fight in EB 200X. I can't quite remember what inspired Jin�s brief appearance, but I'm glad that something did because this was a blast to write. Jin is more skilled than Rashal, but doesn�t want the position of captain. Reading this again, I just realized that I subconsciously referenced Kill Bill when Poo back flips over the chain weapon.
Against Rashal
Rashal screamed in anger and launched himself into the air at the Chosen Boy. Ness's hands let out a familiar glow and Paula's eyes shot open. She quickly stuck her hand out and sent Rashal flying back yet again with a psychic blast.
Ness helped Paula stand up. "You alright?"
Paula's face remained expressionless. "Fine."
Rashal had corrected himself in midair and was dashing toward the two again. This time Ness sent him a blast of PSI Rockin' and sent him against a wall.
Rashal wearily stood up, "I will not suffer this humiliation!"
Poo suddenly burst into the room, sword drawn. "RASHAL!"
Rashal gets his butt handed to him at this point. Despite his brief victory over Paula, he never gets the upper hand in this fight. Despite all of his threats and backstabbing, he�s really nothing more than a common criminal at this point.
The Choice
"FOR DALAAM!"
Poo began to run toward Rashal. Ness and Paula tried to aim blasts of PSI, only to find that the girl was too close. The sword began to fall, the girl's mother screamed, a gun fired.
Rashal's sword fell harmlessly to the ground with a clang. A burn mark appeared in between Rashal's eyes where Jeff's Gaia Beam had hit. Rashal fell first to his knees and then sideways onto the ground. The jewel in his helmet fell out with a dull thud.
The Gaia Beam fell out of Jeff's trembling hands as he fell to his knees. "What did I do? What did I just do?"
Ness put his arm around his shoulder and helped him stand back up. "You did what you had to, Jeff."
Rashal's character was based on Macbeth. He kills for power only to find that he must continue killing to keep his power. He runs from judging his own actions by insisting against all logic that what he�s doing must be correct. Rashal is also extremely proud and refuses to fail, henceforth why he goes after the last of the hostages. As for why I chose Jeff to kill Rashal, I honestly just wanted something for him to do. I looked back on the story and realized that Jeff hasn�t really done anything of significance yet. I really didn�t want to only have Jeff included in the story because "hey, he was in 'EarthBound' so he has to be in this." So I had something important happen to him that will hopefully make him more interesting. This moment sets up for the choices that Jeff makes in the final chapter.
The Moment Arrives
"I would like for yourself, Ms. Polestar, and Mr. Andonuts to come with me."
Ness looked at Poo. "What about Poo?"
Matthews did a double take when he looked at the young prince. "I'm terribly sorry, I thought that you were dead."
"I got better."
"I see, that makes sense, you are one of the Chosen Four after all."
Ness brought the conversation back on track, "Why do you want us to go with you?"
"The short answer is: Dalaam has invaded."
DUN DUN DUNNNNN! And finally Pokey's master plan is unveiled to the main characters. I don't want to say too much about it since it would spoil a couple of minor things in the upcoming chapter, but I will say that Pokey has more weapons at his disposal than just a Starman army.
That's all I've got to say about that, thanks for reading this, the final chapter is on its way (I just have to worry about silly little details such as starting to write it).
EFR
About The Author