episode3

Episode 3: Monkey X

The away team had been very successful in collecting data on their surrounding environment. They had been gone for hours and had written down what they had seen, animals, plants and even a new type of hairclip that Mat had discovered. They had no idea, however, what had happened to the crew?

"Hmmm?look at these weird berries..." Jeremy bent down to examine a bush. "They seem odd..."
"Hey, they look like crapberries!" Mat came running over to inspect the berries. "We have these on our planet! They taste like crap." He grabbed a few and put them in his pocket. "We eat 'em all the time!"
"Thank you for sharing." Brittany put the thought out of her mind.
"HOLY HINGE!!!" Alex jumped up and around, trying to access his back pocket. "Something is vibrating in my pants!"
"Oh," Jeremy stood up. "That must be the new quadcorder I ordered for everyone!"

Alex finally reaches into his pocket and pulls out a scanning instrument. He fliped it open and it started buzzing and bleeping, recording all sorts of new information.

"Hey captain," he said. "it says that there are intruders on our ship."
"Yeah, I knew that." Said Brittany, looking at an odd leaf.
"What??" shouted Jeremy. "You knew and you didnt say anything?!?!"
"Gimme a break here! I'm new at this psychic stuff!"
"Hehe..." chuckled Mat.
"Shut up, you!" was Brittany's retort.

Jeremy reached in his front pocket and pulled out his communicator. He extended the antennae and dialed the number for the Rentacar.

"Away team to Rentacar, come in Rentacar." He said into the piece of equipment.
After a while, there was an answer. "Were sorry, we cant answer your call right now, please leave a message after the tone and we will get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you!" the message was followed by a beep, after which Jeremy ended the call.
"Damn." He put his communicator away. "I got the answering machine."
"Maybe cute little fuzzy creatures overran them and then they got gagged and put in the cargo bay and now we are they're only hope!" ventured Mat.
"Yeah right." Alex pushed Mat. "You have a wild imagination, Schnubb."
Jeremy thought for a bit. "It's probably nothing, but here's the plan anyways. We'll send both anonymous crewmen in the ship first, so if anything is wrong, they'll die instead of us."
"Okay." Agreed Brittany.
"Sounds good." Consented Alex.
"I have to potty." Conveyed Mat.

They silently made their way back to where the ship had crash-landed and hid in the bushes near the tree line. Jeremy whispered the plan to the two anonymous crewmen, who thought very little of it and wondered off towards the ship. They were almost immediately devoured exactly like the first crewman, in a flash.

"Good thing we didn't go in eh?" said Brittany, still hiding in the bushes.
"Aren't I brilliant?" Jeremy smiled.
"Wait...what's that?" Alex put a hand over his eyes to cover the sun. "Over there, over that mountain!" he pointed in the general direction.
"I see it!" said Mat. "It's huge! And it's shining like a sun!"
"Not that, Schnubb! That's the sun! Look over there!" Jeremy pointed in the right direction. "Looks like a huge...building of some sort..." he squinted his eyes.

For no apparent reason, the ground started to shake. Cute little fuzzy creatures popped out of the bushes around the away team and pounced on everyone, trying to knock them out. Alex raged with all of his might and began attacking the creatures.

"Kill 'em!" he yelled. "Kill 'em all!"

He continued beating the little creatures along with his crewmates, but there are too many and he gets knocked out and dragged away into the bushes. Soon, so are Mat and Britt. Jeremy was left alone, surrounded by dozens upon dozens of cute little fuzzy creatures, some of them wielding sticks.

"No?" he looked at his clenched fists. "No!" he raised them in the air. "Noooooooooooo!!!!" he shook his fists with all of his strength.

He quickly sprung his laser blaster from it's holster at his hip and set it to maximum vaporize. He took aim and shot as many of the creatures as he could, creating a pathway for him to run down. He fathomed the thought that the building, in the middle of nowhere, must have been the key to saving his crewmates, his friends. He ran as fast as he could towards it, firing away with his blaster on his way.

Once he had reached the building, the cute little fuzzy creatures were right on his tail. He noticed an escalator and hopped on it, and once he did, the creatures stopped dead in their tracks and cowered away in fear. This must have been it, he thought, taking his time, letting the escalator swoop him to the top of the building.

Once he got there, he looked around and twirled his blaster on his trigger finger. Some sort of crow was buzzing around above the building, apparently looking for a meal. Then, out of nowhere, or out of the door that was on the other side of the rooftop, an apish looking monkey springs onto the middle of the building's top.

The monkey was very muscular and was almost as tall as Jeremy. He was slouching like a primate would, and he was wearing clothes like a sultan from Arabia. He was wearing a lot of jewelry on his fingers, his wrists and around his neck. He also wore a cape that was flapping in the strong wind.

"Who are you?" Demanded Jeremy. "What have you done with my friends?"
"I will answer only one of your questions at a time, feeble human!" replied the monkey, crossing his arms.
"Fine! Who are you, and then, what have you done with my friends?"
"Which question should I answer first?"
"I don't care!"
"If you don't care, then why are you asking?" asked the monkey.
"Alright, alright, who are you, and then what have you done with my friends."
"My name is Monkey X! Your friends are being held on their vessel, which will be melted and sold to an overpaying Styrofoam company! Hahahahaha!"
"You can't do that! You will be destroyed, frothy beast!" Jeremy took aim with his blaster.
"Well," the monkey started, "that is the only way to set your friends free, for you see, my minions are directly controlled by my self-esteem! Hahaha!"

Jeremy pulled the trigger on his blaster to discover that it was out of energy. He stared at the laughing monkey and put the weapon back into it's holster. After a few minutes of staring, he started to run towards his foe, who started to do the same.

"Wait a minute, monkey!" Jeremy stopped running.
"Why?" Monkey X was confused.
"Because I have something for you."
"Really? I love presents!" he clapped his hands in excitement. "What is it?"
"It's called KONG FU FIGHTING!!! Waaaa!!! Hayaaaa!!!"

Jeremy kicks Monkey X's ass with every swift blow of Kung Fu. After significant ass-beating, the overzealous monkey retreated, crying it's eyes out, into the building from whence it came. The cute little fuzzy creatures, as predicted, died in the wake of their master's self-esteem failure.

A few hours later, once all of the creatures were disposed of and the ship was completely repaired, the senior staff assembled on the bridge.

"Aaaaah. Saved the day again." Jeremy leaned back into his chair.
"How come you get to hog all the glory all the time?" asked Alex.
"Because I sit in the big chair. So screw you."
"Um...something is wrong with Ben." Jennifer was poking Ben, who looked very ill.
"What is it?" asked Britt.
"OH MY GOD! THERE IS A NIPPLE ON MY FOREHEAD!!!" yelled out Ben in terror.
"He seems to be infected with a disease called Jumbloitus." Jennifer said, consulting the computer. "It comes from any sort of cute fuzzy thing."
"Oh! Oh! I know! I know!" Mat was pouncing up and down, raising his arm. "We can go to planet Omacron-Zeta-5839! There's a potion there to get rid of the disease!"
"Well then, seems like our adventure isn't over yet! Anita, once we've lifted off the planet, set a course for Omacron-Zeta-5839." Ordered Jeremy.
"Aye Aye sir."
"Oh god no?another one on my hand...and another on my nose..." Ben started crying, and no one dared get close enough to console him.
Our heroes must now race against time to heal Ben. But what awaits them on planet Omacron-Zeta-5839? Find out next time on Adventures In Space!!! (echo effect)