| Episode 10: Planets And Bananas Part I |
| The Starship Rentacar�is under attack by unknown aliens threatening to destroy every ounce of peace in the known universe!!! Jer: Ben! How much do we know about the universe??!? Ben: Umm�Well we know that cheese is made from cows� Jer: Life without cows, or no life at all�meh, life without cows sounds ok� ***Brit gives Jer the evil eye*** Jer: Ok, ok, fine. Anita, initiate tactical maneuver alpha-gamma 8 mark 216. Alex, prepare to commence firing procedures when target is within point 000385 distance. Bridge to engine room. Dan, divert power from all non-essential systems including life support to the engines. Ben: Sir! They�re coming about! They�re going to shoot! Jer: *sigh* No fancy moves this time, I guess�Al, fire all weapons. Al: YES SIR!! ***The Rentacar fires everything it has to the enemy ship, which blows up into a billion pieces*** Mat: Marvelous! Jer: Something�s not right�Ben, count the pieces again� Ben: Your right, captain! There are a billion and ONE pieces! Jer: What do you think, Brit? Brit: I think it�s a life form. Mat: I feel strange, yet misinformed! I need to use the potty! ***Mat leaves the bridge*** Jer: Ben, teleport the life form to the hospital room and inform Jennifer she may have wounded. Brit, Anita, your with me. Were going to go see this thing. Al, you have the bridge. Anita: Why am I going? Al: Woohoo!! Ben: Why don�t I have the bridge? I never get the bridge! Jer: Anita, it�s just in case this thing needs nurturing and caring. Ugh�feelings� ***In the hospital room*** Jen: Well, this is our little patient, guys. Brit: Aaah! Oww�brain�hurty�ouchy�ooooh�*passes out* Crewman #87: Sir, shield your eyes! Anita: It�s hideous! Jer: It�s�a Schnubb!!!!!!! Jen: Yep, he looks like a Schnubb all right�a little cutsey-woutsey one, too! ***The baby Schnubb burps in Crewman #87�s direction, who disintegrates almost immediately*** Jen: Yeah, stand back. Jer: Ok. How old is it? Jen: HE is 2 years old. Anita: Guys�a little help please? *little Schnubb is humping her leg* Jer: *poking the Schnubb* Off! Bad Schnubb! Bad Schnubb! Off! Off! ***Jennifer gives the Schnubb a needle, and it passes out*** Jer: If your having trouble with the little bugger, try getting Mat to play with it. Oh, and give it a name. I�d hate to have to call it �it� all the time. Jen: Oky doky. ***Meanwhile, on the bridge*** Ben: Hey, Alex, there�s a ship on sensors. Al: Shoot it!! Ben: But we don�t know who they are! Geez�I�m hailing the ship. ***An alien shows up on the TV screen. Jer, Anita and Brit are back on the bridge*** Jer: Alex, at your post. I�ll take it from here. Greetings, unrecognizable alien. I am Captain Jeremy of the starship Rentacar. Alien: I have no time for chit chat, human. There is a stowaway onboard your vessel that belongs to us. Release him to us immediately, or be destroyed. Jer: Ok, he's all yours. ***Brit gives Jer the evil eye*** Jer: Oh give me a break! Fine, fine. We will never surrender an innocent being to a creature as wretched and twisted as you, freak! It is YOU that will be destroyed! ***The TV screen shuts off and the Rentacar shakes violently*** Al: They�re attacking us!! Jer: Well, I tried. Prepare to surrender the Schnubb. Brit: No way. Alex, fire back! Al: Yes ma�am! ***The Rentacar shoots back at the alien ship, and then the alien appears on the TV screen again*** Jer: I don�t want to say I told you so, but� Alien: We will be back! With more ships, too! Relish this minor victory, for it will be your last! Jer: Oky doky. ***The alien ship zoomed out into superhyperduperspaceflight*** Jer: Suggestions? Al: We could shoot everything! Jer: Any sane suggestions? Ben: We could track the vessel�s superhyperduperspaceflight ionization trail. That way, we could catch up to the enemy using our superior inner-stellar engines. Jer: In simpler suggestions? Anita: We could follow the aliens. Jer: Good thinking Anita! Brit: Yeah, I think a promotion is in order soon. Continue the good work Anita! Ben: Ok, That�s it. I quit!! Brit: *psychicly* No you don�t. Ben: Yeah, your right. ***Ben continues pushing buttons, Jer and Brit share a high-five*** Mat: *on the speakerphone, in the hospital room* Jeremy, I think that we should get popples to Schnubbland as soon as possible. Brit: �Popples�? Jer: �Schnubbland�? Mat: I named our little visitor �Popples�. Jen: He has contracted a rare disease native to Schnubbs. The only cure is on they�re home planet, Schnubbland. Jer: Is there any danger to our Schnubb, Mat? Jen: He�s�already infected� Mat: WHAAAA?!?! IIIIIIIIIIIIHHHH!!!! Brit: Owowowow! My head hurts!! *passes out* Al: That�s been happening a lot. Jer: Anita, set a course for Schnubbland! Anita: It isn�t even in the ship�s databanks� Ben: It�s right next to earth. Jer: It�s right next to earth, Anita. Anita: Course set. Mysteriously powerful engines online. Jer: Maximum superhyperduperspaceflight! Engage! What is this disease that our Schnubbs have contracted? What will happen to Popples? What will happen on Schnubbland? Will that mean old alien show up again? Find out all this and more next time on the season 2 openner of: Adventures In Space!!! (echo effect) |
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