Khan bahadur sahab ne to khane ki aisi vyavashtha ki thi jaise waakai koi bahoot bada "dinner" ho. Yeh theek hai ki hum log bhi kuch kam shaan se na aaye the. Hum khud bakaayeda "Dinner jacket" mein the. Walid saahab khane ke desi libaas mein the. Syaah sherwaani, safed chudidaar payjaama, varnish ka pump aur kaali juraabein. Mirza saahab bhi walid saahab ki sherwaani mein phoote nikalte the. Magar yahan to rajsi thaath the, baire pagdhiyaan baandhe idhar se udhar tahelte phir rahe hain. Khud Khan bahadur saahab dinner jacket mein maujood hain. Aur to aur unki vishalkay beghum sahiba, imaarat ki imaarat nihaayat keemati libaas mein ek sofe par rakhi hui thi hum logon ka swagat karne ke baad humein gol kamre mein laaya gaya aur Khan bahadur saahab ne jo is samay vinodsheel bhi bane hue the, bade, mukuraate hue beghum saahiba se sab ka parichay karaate hue kaha-" Saahbaan yeh hain mere dil ki malika!"


Walid saahab ne kaha-" Khoob, goya aap unke dil hain."


Mirza saahab ne jaldi se kaha-" Kya baat farmaayi hai, goya weh dil ki malika naihn, aap unka dil hain."


Khan bahadur saahab ne kaha-" Yeh kehna itna zaroori na tha albatta aap yeh sifarish kar deejiye, ki weh kabhi kabhi mere dil ko aazaad kar diya karein."


Walid saahab ne beghum saahiba ke saamne sabhye dhang se sir jhukaate hue kaha-" Badi khushi hui aapse milkar, aapko to bahen humsaai kehna chahiye."


Khan bahadur saahab ne apni beghum saahiba ko bakaayeda sharmaane bhi na diya. Atyant bhondi hansi hans kar bole-" Magar bandnawaaz, aapse shikaayat zaroor hai ki aap humaari bahen humsaai ko na laaye."


Aur ab beghum saahiba ne bhi apna tawaak-sa munh saadhi ke aanchal mein chhipaate hue kaha-" Beghum saahiba kyon nahin aayi?"


Walid saahab ne turant uttar diya-" Are saahab, un bechaari ko aaye din ki beemariyon ne is qabil nahin rakha hai ki kahin aayein jaayein. Chaubees ghante nurse ke sahaare rehti hain."


Khan bahadur saahab ne kaha-" Weh to main dekhta hoon ki Miss Pal bechaari shaayad unhi ki chinta mein din raat idhar se udhar bhaagti hain. Aakhir shikaayat kya hai, bhabhi saahiba ko?"


Humne socha ki jaldi se koi uchit rog bata de, kyonki bhay yeh tha ki na jaane walid saahab kya beemari keh jaayein. Magar tauba keejiye weh bhala chookne waale hain, ajeeb samajh paai hai unhonein. Turant uttar diya-" Hazrat kya arz karoon, kisi ne kaha- sannipaat hai, kisis ne kaha pagalpan hai, tarahtarah ke ilaaj karaata raha. Magar asal baat yeh hai ki dangon ki weh bhaayaanak ghatnaayein dekhi hain ki dimaag par unka bahoot hi naagwaar asar padh gaya hai. Unhi ke kaaran dimaag chal gaya hai."


Khan bahadur saahab ne kaha-" Allah rahem kare!" Aur apni beghum ki or palat kar bole-" Kisi waqt mizaaj pursi kar aao na tum?"


Beghum saahiba ne kaha-" Main zaroor jaaoongi."


Itne hi mein...........


Nazar behki, hijaab utha hui ik roshni paida.


Phir is se bachne kya sambhalne sakht mushkil tha.


Ek dum sabki nazarein us nawaaguntaka ladki ki or uth gayi, jo ek salaam mein saari mehfil ko taal le jaane ke baad apni maa ke paas simat kar baidh gayi. Khule hue rukhe sunhari baalon par laal rang ka chauda sa ribbon bandha hua aur isi rang ka suit R.ana ko waakai is samay deep shikha banaaye hue tha. Khan bahadur saahab ne R.ana ko dekhkar bade garv se muskuraate hue kaha-" Aap mehmaano se bhi zyaada mehmaan saabit hui. Sabke baad tashreef laai hain. Beti, tumne chacha ko bhi salaam kiya?"


Walid saahab ne kaha-" Main us bechaari ka salaam kabool karke duaayein bhi de chuka hoon. Aapko abhi tak salaam hi kipadhi hui hai. Idhar aao beti, tum mere paas sofe par baidho."


R.ana maa ke paas se uthkar walid saahab ke sameep sofe par jaa baidhi. Aur walid saahab ne shuddh poorvi sabhyata ke anusaar unke sir par haath pher kar kaha-" Tum bhi kehti hogi, achche chacha hain ki itne dino se deewar beech rehte hain aur ab tak bhateeji ko poochcha bhi nahin."


Khan bahadur saahab ne kaha-" Yhai baat chacha bhi to keh sakte hain ki achchi bahteeji hai, ki chacha ko kabhi salaam tak bhi jaakar nahin kiya."


Beghum saahiba ne kaha-" Inki duniya to bas inki kitaabein hain."


Khan bahadur saahab ne kaha-" Khair yeh to janaab galat farma rahi hain is gareeb ko ghar ki bhi kuch kam fikr nahin hai. Khuda jhooth na bulwaaye to mahaz is kamre mein har kuishon usi ka banaaya hua hai, har parda dar usi ne banwaaya hai. Yeh mental piece hi dekh leejiye."


Walid saahab ne kaha-" Subhaan Allah Chashm-e-bad-door. Yeh to badi sugadh beti nikali."


Aur Mirza saahab apni kursi se khamoshi ke saath uthkar mental piece ke kareeb pahoonch kar jhaalar ko chashma lagaakar dekhte hue bole-" Goya yeh sab haath ka kaam hai?"


Walid saahab ne kaha-" Jee nahin, thodha sa machine ka kaam bhi hai."


R.ana ne kaha-" Jee nahin, machine ka to is mein koi kaam hi nahin hai."


Walid saahab ne kaha-" Weh hashiye jo siye hain, weh to machine hi se siye hain na?"


R.ana ne hanskar kaha-" Weh to khair doosri baat hai, kaam to na hua weh."


Mirza saahab ne kaha-" wahi to main kehen waala tha ki machine mein weh safaai kahan? Khuda buri nazar se bachaaye, kya dastkaari hai? Maaloom hota hai ki jaise har phool abhi khila hai."


Khan bahdur saahab ne kaha-" Bhai Mirza, tum meri ladki ki tareef kar karke chaupat na kar dena kahin. Weh bechaari tareef chahne waale raeeson mein se nahin hai.


Mirza saahab ne kaha-" Khuda ki kasam aisi haath ki safaai nazar se na guzri thi aur yeh gaddon ke gilaaf bhi Subhaan Allah! Subhaan Allah! Kya moti piroye hain. Huzoor yeh bagla banaaya hai ki khuda ki duhaai hai."


R.ana ne hanskar kaha-" Jee bagla nahin, saaras hai."


Mirza saahab ne kaha-" Wahi to main kahoon ki bagla, yeh kuch aam baglon se mukhtalif hai- Saaras hai. Tab to kya kehna hai ki bilkul saaras, solah aane saaras!"


Theek isi samay baire ne aakar bhojan ki taiyaari ki soochna di aur Khan bahadur saahab hum sab ko lekar bhojan ke kamre mein aa gaye jahan ek lambi chaudhi mez par bhanti bhanti ke khane rakaabdari ke samast chonchlon ke saath saje hue the aur tahel tahel ke khane ki vyavastha thi. R.ana ne badhkar plate, kanta aur chamcha walid saahab ko diya, phir Mirza saahab ko. Aur aakhir mein hum prateeksha mein the ki usne paas se guzarte hue kaha-" aap khud takleef keejiye."


Atenw khud hi kasht karna padha. Magar sach poochhiye to asal kasht bechaare Mirza saahab ko ho raha tha, jinhein is prakaar khadhe khadhe khaane ka shaayad abhyaas nahin tha. Khaane ka yeh dhang har ek ke bas ki baat nahin hai, vishesht: weh log jo dono haathon se khaate hain. Mirza saahab gareeb ki samajh mein kuch na aa raha tha ki kis tarah plate pakdhein aur kis tarah kaur uthayein. Unka bas chalta to dono hathon se plate pakadh kar pani peene ke andaaz se pulaaw khana shuroo kar dete. Bhanti bhanti kr khaane ko nihaayat hazrat se dekh rahe the ki agar yahi dhang hai khane ka, to yeh sab miyaamatein dhari reh jaayeingi aur na neeyat bharegi na pet. Humein sabse adhik shanka walid saahab ki or se thi magar tauba keejiye weh mez ke saamne kursi par baidhkar hajaamat banaane ke abhyast thehre. Is samay bhi ek haath mein plate, doosre mein kaanta is prakaar liye hue the jaise ek haath mein kangha aur doosre mein kainchi liye rehte the aur tezi se kha rahe the, jaise nihaayat safaai se kachaakach baal kaat rahe ho.


R.ana ki walida sahiba apni plate ko maalgodaam banaakar ek kursi par baidhi kha rahi thi. R.ana vibhinn khaanon ki dishein le lekar kabhi walid saahab ke paas jaati thi, kabhi Khan bahadur ke paas aur kabhi Mirza saahab ke paas, jidd thi to ek humse. Aakhir khud Khan bahadur saahab ne usse kaha-" Beti, zaraa is gareeb ko bhi poochh lo. Khali plate liye khadha hai."


Humne arz kiya-" Kai baar khali kar chuka hoon, koi kahan tak poochhe!"


R.ana ne kareeb aakar kaha-"Plate mez par rakh deejiye, aur yeh murg jibeh karne ki koshish keejiye."


Mirza saahab kareeb hi the- Mushaayare ke taksaali shrotaaon ki tarah ek dum beqabu hokar bole-" Aye Subhaan Allah! Murg kaatne ke liye murg jibeh karna kya baat paida ki hai. Maashaa Allah saahabzadi!"


Khan bahadur saahab ne kaha-" Aap daad hi dete rahenge yaa kuch lenge bhi. Bhai Mirza saahab, aapko agar is tarah taqleef ho rahi hai, to baidh jaaeeye kursi par."


Mirza saahab ne kursi ki or lapakte hue kaha-" Huzoor waala, yahi main bhi to kehne wala tha. Is tarah khaane ke liye do haath zaraa nakaafi saabit hote ho rahe hain. Kis tarah koi plate pakdhe aur kis tarah niwaala banaaye."


Walid saahab ne kaha-" isiliye aapse arz kiya gaya hai ki aap tashreef rakhein, taki zara haath dikha sakein."


Bhojan ke ant mein meethi dish sabse zaada pasand ki gayi. Aur walid saahab ne ek baar ke alaawa dobaara aur maangi, to beghum saahiba ne sharmaate hue kaha-" Aaj R.ana ne yahi pudding banaayi thi aur yahi sabko pasand aayi hai."


Khan bahadur saahab ne kaha-" Yeh to koi nayi baat nahin hai. Khaana awal to meri beti pakaati nahin hai, agar kabhi paka bhi deti hai to wahi cheez baazi le jaati hai, jo usne pakaai ho."


Mirza saahab ne bhi doosri baar pudding se plate bharte hue kaha-" Jawaab nahin hai iska huzoor waala! Kya mazaa hai ki tabiyat mein suroor aa jaata hai!"


Atenw Mirza saahab sabke aakhir mein khaane ke kamre se nikle aur us samay tak pudding ki taareef karte rahe, jab tak coffe na aa gayi. R.ana ne Mirza saahab ko apne haath se coffe bana kar di aur chupke se keh gayi ki yeh bhi maine banaayi hai. Magar coffe ka mazaa Mirza saahab ki samajh mein na aa saka. Yon peene ko weh poori do pyaaliyaan pee gaye. Weh to shaayad aur bhi peete magar walid saahab ne paan pesh kar diya taaki kisi prakaar yeh silsila khatm ho.


           
   
       

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