I had formerly discounted Muslim extremists having one iota of sense- but the latest online run-in has changed my view. Thanks to their unparalleled powers of analysis, coupled with the sure knowledge that "Yahoods" (pejorative used in accusing "1/4" {extremists have trouble with sociology and statistics} of the world of the "crime" of being Jewish) are behind every form of cognitive subversion- the most fearsome threat to the future of humanity has been exposed. The Cartoon!
Veiled in a childlike exterior, the uninitiated remain unawares of the destructive energies of "Pinky and the Brain," "The Jetsons," "South Park"- and ultimately the megatons of sacrilegious TNT contained with the frames of "Mickey Mouse." Islam's very survival is at stake, for a satirical website called "Messiah Mickey" has a photo with the Ka'ba replaced by the Epcot Center's geodesic dome. Eeak gads! Holy Smoke! The perpetrator must be apprehended immediately, charged with a fatal attack on the ever living Allah! (I certainly hope the good people at Disney aren't offended by that ;-)- surely there is no contest- Disneyland is a heck of a lot more fun than the stampedes and neck to neck crowds of Mecca at pilgrimage.)
Enter the Magical World of Blasphemy, where religion gets its proper place as nothing more than an amusement park (except with more tawdry thrills). Travel to the Land of Make Believe, where a few score Saudis are unable to comprehend that the author of "Messiah Mickey" isn't Jewish, save if you figure in the honorary membership he deserves for his stellar sense of humor.
Humor is haraam (forbidden)- how else to explain how to make people bow down five times before thin air towards a Cube umpteen kilometers away? To believe a fanciful story that Allah originally wanted the Muslims to pray 50 times a day, until that shrewd bargainer Moshe got Muhammad to beg the All-Knowing for a reduction? That Allah will only accept their prayers as valid if they don't fart in the middle of them? That Allah, Creator of the Heavens and the Earth didn't have knowledge of the extreme variances in the length of night and day in the far North and South latitudes used to calculate prayer times (or the wits to implement a solar calendar)? That male genitalia are required to lead the prayers of a Friday congregation? They can only believe the long list of the laughable if you force them to keep a straight face.
I certainly wish Messiah Mickey the best, but I'm thinking that with the death threats in his guest book, he had better go around incognito for a while. At least until such a time as the terminally offended can figure out how to turn off their Internet connections, and not read something they would find bothersome (or more likely find as their religious duty to destroy) in the first place...