The Fellowship Of The Ring
Frodo Baggins
Holds Ring in his hand and looks at it. Gets invisible at times. Lazy, leaves the rest to the fighting of Orcs and Ringwraiths while pretending to be stabbed by Morgul blade. V. selfish, trying to leave rest of Fellowship behind at Amon Hen. Too shy to admit love for Sam and treating him as slave to cover up his crush. Jealous of Gollum for he�s got even bigger eyes, though they are not so blue.
Samwise Gamgee (aka Sam)
Personal slave of Fellowship. Acting all stupid and innocent but in the meantime being wiser than the rest of the Fellowship put together. Feels like mother, taking care of everyone. Can do v. interesting things with pans. Doesn�t like dancing but has love for ale. Likes hiding in hedges and bushes and eavesdropping on people, especially at secret meetings.
Meriadoc Brandybuck (aka Merry)
Looks angry ALL the time. Bossy and possesive about Pippin. Loves carrots and mushrooms, drinks pints. Thinks he�s important but is only used as bait to the Uruk-hai by Frodo. Healthy and aware of diet, constantly eating apples. Knows exact distances between bridges, ferries, roads and so has much better sense of direction than his cousin Pippin.
Peregrin Took (aka Pippin)
Eats a lot but doesn�t show it (must have v. good personal trainer). Likes to throw corpses down wells. Naive, doesn�t realise the only reason the Fellowship takes him with them is to serve as bait for scary creatures. Bad sense of direction and timing.
Gandalf The Grey
Jealous of Saruman�s good looks. Keeps talking about �riddles in the dark�. Has strange friends under both Men, Elfs, Dwarves and Hobbits. Has ability to talk to animals and shares thoughts with enormous eagle. Has a silly liking for base-jumping at the Bridge of Khazad-dum.
Saruman The White
Has same hairdresser as Elrond. Does not surround self with same good-looking creatures though. Needs to recommend manicurist to Gollem. Hates trees and shabby old wizards. Keeps robe very white. Must use good detergent.
Aragorn, Son Of Arathorn (aka Strider, aka Elessar, aka�)
His hair hasn�t been washed since last rainfall in Middle-Earth. Legolas follows him everywhere with his combs. Has approx. threethousand swords, knives AND names. Likes older women. Thinks he�s mysterious, but has gotta stop Elves shouting around he is the King. Has v. strange friends and should visit barber.
Boromir
Likes to blow (his own) horn. Looses out in a swordfight to two undersized loons. Tries to take Ring from other shorty but gets kicked in stomach. Fights Uruk-hai even with three arrows in chest to be kissed by Aragorn. Should visit barber too, though.
Legolas, Prince Of Mirkwood
Takes care of the looks. Forces the others to take baths. Especially troubled with Aragorn. Jumps on rocks and looks around. Walks on snow. Shoots arrows in trolls and orcs. Hears voices and talks about shadows in his mind. Has secret crush on Gimli. V. goodlooking.
Gimli, Son Of Gloin
Huge dislike of Elves though does like Legolas, but then again, who doesn�t? V. proud of beard and other facial (body?) hair. Thinking he�s smart but in the end always wrong. Keeps running around with his axe swaying from side to side.
Elrond
Well conserved after over three-thousand years. (Like to know what nightcream he uses) Has v. good hairdresser. Should try another colour though. In spite of very loud shout "Isildur!" in most dramatic voice did not get to destroy Ring and be hero.
Arwen Undomiel
Likes younger Men with loadsa hair. Very brave and good with horses. Can talk to water and actually gets answered back. Likes to give away beautiful jewellery to Rangers. Goes to same hairdresser and tailor as her father.
Galadriel
Loadsa blonde curls. Radiates light. Too pretty for own good. Likes to talk in dramatic voice about things in past, present and future. Hates when Legolas takes baths in her waters. Can be v. scary when offered Ring.
Bilbo Baggins
Thief, stole Ring of Gollum. Best friends with Gandalf. Worries more about food, parties and relatives visiting than about the power of the One. V. cruel, leaves poor ol� Frodo alone at Bag End. Gets v. scary facial expressions when watching the One around Fro�s neck, but that could be his kleptomania.
Gollum
Goes on and on and on and on about preciousssss Ring. Must see dentist to get rid of his lisp. Very definitely needs manicure. V. big eyes. Revealed place of Ring pretending to be tortured in Barad-dur.
Lurtz
Has whole bunch of twin brothers. Likes running through woods hunting things. Very, very mean, shoots arrows in Boromir. Even with only one arm and sword in stomach can roar pretty damn loud. Loses his head�