$$$Now before we dispense with the necessary Luciano bashing, something else has caught our attention. A certain MISSLE, or Matthew as our dear Chaos calls him, has seemed to have over stepped his boundaries. He seems to think that he, of all people is the so-called "elite" here in FWF. He seems to think that he is the only one in that higher level of society, reached only by a few excellent individuals. Excellence is certainly something you would know about, right Matthew? After all, you've been surounded by "Jagged" Jeff Jackson, and Mr. Sane's former partners in crime, the infamous Jimmy and the incomperable Brock Williams. And what do they have in common with you? ALL were World Champions. Except, my dear Matthew, there seems to be a very distinct difference between you and those three. They, Matthew, were known and will forever be known by all fans, while you, will be a fad and will never last longer than Mr. Sane allows it to. So, consider Cyberslam your final bow. Now, that we're done with Matthew, we can move on to more important matters, for example, the growing excitement in the pool of FranchiseN' Freaks about Mr. Sane's unavoidable victory over Mr. Luciano Saturday and the upcoming decimation of the other nine teams in this rumble, as it has been dubbed. Why wouldn't there be? After all, have we led you astray yet? Has Mr. Sane proved that he is STILL and always will be the greatest man to EVER step into the FWF? I do believe he has not, nor do I believe he ever will. And why? Well, to put it simply, he is THAT...MUCH...BETTER.$$$
$$$As the view fades in you can see a light blue. It is predominant in your view, until a small spot of white slowly floats into view. You begin to think you're in some type of supernatural "heaven", so to speak. However, as you begin to clear up, you realize you're staring at the sky on a beautiful winter day, the sun high in the sky and few coulds in sight. Your eyes drift down to your level and you look out among the people bustling by you. You turn to the street as you hear loud honks and yells. You see a white limo in the middle of the street, seeming stationary, as the rows of cars behind it scream and yell for it to move. Suddenly, a door opens and you watch as Justin Sane slowly makes his way out of the limo, running into a child and her mother on the way out. He ignores them, completely oblivious to the people cursing behind him. Lil Person quickly follows and tries to comfort the woman as you look on. You see the duo make their way to the street as the limo speeds off. The cars drive by slowly, honking their horns and yelling at Justin.$$$
Driver #1: YOU SON OF A BITCH!
Driver #2: FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!
Driver #3: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!
Justin: ...Oblivious... Lil Person?
Lil Person: What, Justin?
Justin: Why are these people cursing at me?
Lil Person: Probably because you've held them up for a good hour.
Justin: But I couldn't get the knot out of my shoelace!
Lil Person: So? That should't take a god damned hour!
Justin: These shoes can be tricky.
$$$You watch as Lil Person and Justin Sane make their way to the sidewalk, the cars speeding off. Justin is decked out in a blue Levis 420 jeans and a black, turtleneck sweater, the IN title neatly draped over his shoulder. Lil Person is once again in his custom made, white Armani suit, lined with veritcal black stripes.$$$
Lil Person: So, you want to tell me why we're here? Or are you going to keep it a surprise?
Justin: What kind of friend would I be if I didn't keep you in suspense?
Lil Person: ...Feigning interest... Yay.
$$$You see the duo walk forward past towo uniformed men. They open two glass doors and walk in like they belong there. You look up and see the sign...POLICE PRECINGT...DIV 31.$$$
Justin: ...Asking an officer... So, where can I go to get some info around here?
Justin: ...Sarcastically... Try the information desk, genius.
$$$The officer walks away and you walk around to see Justin Sane and Lil Person standing there. Justin's confused.$$$
Justin: You know, people can be so inconsiderate now a days.
Lil Person: It was a pretty dumb question, Justin.
Justin: I realize that, but he didn't even tell us where the information desk was!
Lil Person: ...Sighing... Ugh, it's right over ...Pointing... there, next to the big INFORMATION sign.
Justin: I knew that.
Lil Person: Sure you did. You know, without Joey you're turning into a moron. We're going to have to do something about that.
Justin: I'm telling you, it's because I don't have anyone to abuse. It diverts my energy and brings out other aspects of myself.
Lil Person: Like the fact you're an idiot?
$$$Justin growls at Lil Person and gives him that look as they make their way over to the information desk. The clerk, a woman, turns around.$$$
Information Girl: Can I help you?
Justin: Uhh, yes. I'd like to know where to apply for relocation?
Information Girl: Over there sir, third door on the right.
Justin: Thank ya kindly.
Information Girl: Hey! Wait a second...aren't you...
Justin: Yes, yes, we are.
Information Girl: ...Starstruck... Could you sign this?
Justin: Sure thing.
$$$Justin and Lil Person sign the book and then walk away, with smiles on their faces. They walk over to the third window and wait for the person in front of them as the woman at the desk looks at her book.$$$
Information Girl: ...In background... HEY! YOU'RE NOT SIGFRIED AND ROY!
$$$The man in front finishes and is escorted by two uniformed cops to the right. Justin steps up and looks into the small clouded window.$$$
Justin: Hey yo! Anyone in there?
Attendant: Yeah, what do you want?
Justin: Well I think that's pretty obvious. I want to apply for relocation.
Attendant: Oh great, another paranoid freak show.
Justin: I'm not paranoid...just concerned.
Attendant: Suuuuure. Well, what crime have you witnessed?
Justin: Well, uhh...none.
Attendant: Uhhh, o...k...Which mob, gang, or jewish PTA is out to get to you?
Justin: ...Confused... Uhh, well, no one from those groups.
Attendant: Well then get the hell out of here. I've got other people with SERIOUS problems to deal with.
Justin: No, no...see, I'm the victim of a conspiracy.
Attendant: Is that so?
Justin: It is, indeed. You see, it all started with Shaku Endbringer. He wanted my IN title back in the summer of 2000, but he wasn't good enough to take it, so he hired my identical, but evil, clone to take me out. He suceeded because my clone took my place in a match and laid down for him and then hid me away for months. And after that Gary Brown...
Attendant: That's all fine and dandy, but why do you need to be relocated NOW?!
Justin: Oh, well, Jimmy Luciano has hired the same people to take me out because he too wants this ...Points to title...
Attendant: Like I said, that's great, now...NEXT!
Justin: No, please. C'mon. You've got to help me!
Attendant: Guards! Remove this madman!...NEXT!
Justin: ...Being grabbed by guards... NOOOO! I'LL DO ANYTHING IF YOU PUT ME AND MY FRIEND IN THE PROGRAM!
Lil Person: Wait a second! WHO SAID I WAS INVOLVED IN THIS?!
Justin: I did...now...PLEASE SIR...ANYTHING!
Attendant: Anything, huh?
Justin: ...Being Dragged away... Yes, anything...Just help!
Attendant: Guards, release him.
Justin: ...Dropped to floor... Thank you! Now, if you'd give me your autograph book, I'd be happy to sign it.
Attendant: Fuck off, I don't want your autograph.
Justin: Well then what do you want?!
Attendant: I want one life-long pass to Jim Harper's night show at the local club.
Justin: ...Shuttering... Ugh...c'mon, anything else.
Attendant: Guards...
Justin: Ok, ok...you got it. Just get me the hell out of here!
Attendant: We can arrange that....GUARDS!
$$$Four men come over and grab Justin and Lil Person. They drag them off to the right as the man behind the window laughs. The camera fades.....$$$
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