Week 7 (9/21 to 9/27):
Phil P., (aka fillipo, phil, etc) for eating my precious popcorn when I asked him nicely to hold onto it. Heading off to tutor in the math lab (I was already unceremoniously late), I had no choice but to leave half my bag of overpriced popcorn with this dork until the next period, 9 minutes later. I asked him nicely not to eat a lot; he could have a few pieces--he agreed with a giant DORK (read: GAY) grin ^_____^. The kid ate all except 6 kernels. SIX LOUSY KERNELS. Therefore, he is the designated LAMER OF THE WEEK. Congratulations, Phil, you have won the LAMER OF THE WEEK AWARD.Phil's many hobbies include chess team, tech club, rubbing his scalp so massive amounts of dandruff fall off, playing 'Super Nintendo' games online, and hugging Cheng Ma. His expertise is in ping-pong and video games, and he takes pride in being able to defeat many computer controlled characters in "Super Smash Bros. Melee," as well as holding a record for finishing an "EVENT MATCH" involving a big green dinosaur. At lunch, Phil regularly consumes salt packets for enjoyment--five packets a day is the norm. In addition to his unhealthy dietary habits, his hygiene could use a makeover. By age 14, most teenagers have heard of 'shampoo.' Phil could take a hint from his peers. What a bright future this kid has. If you wish to congratulate her, you can instant message him on AOL instant messenger--phil88341. Be sure to warn him for me.
Week 3 (8/24 to 8/30):
Kaidi L, (aka KD, 'nerdulousKD,' etc.) for freaking out repeatedly over a not being able to switch a class. She has not annoyed me as much as the afforementioned "Jeremy," but nevertheless managed to 'bother' me for four hours (including an one-hour phone call) on a single topic: how to switch into 7th period calc. As if she couldn't have managed herself. In exchange for my 'help,' she told me she would "BE IN DEBT TO U FOREVER AND EVER!!!" Wonderful. Congratulations, KD, you have won the LAMER OF THE WEEK AWARD.Kaidi is well known for her 'brief' obsession over (NAME CENSORED), claiming (NAME CENSORED) is extremely and undenialably hot. And (NAME CENSORED) happens to be in her calc class she switched into (did I mention (NAME CENSORED) is younger than her?) Coincidence? I think not. She is also especially fond of a video game character, "Tidus," of Final Fantasy X. For your information, Tidus is a pixelated character whose voice-over strongly hints at homo- if not bi-sexual characteristics, as do many of his pictures Kaidi posts on her xanga. If you wish to congratulate her, e-mail her at [email protected]!
Week 2 (8/17 to 8/23):
Jeremy L , (aka jermy, germy, pyrofist) for continuing to annoy me and spamming my guestbook even after I have officially labeled him as a flaming lamer. A freaking flaming lamer. His incessent rambling online has also annoyed me to no end. Congratulations, Jeremy, you have won the LAMER OF THE WEEK AWARD.Jeremy is especially proud of the rebellious life he lives--he stays up past 2 on school nights to play outdated games such as 'Diablo II" and "Final Fantasy 3." He is also proud of the various fetishes he has, ranging from a love of matches to a certain person whom I will refer to as 'the sunshine,' a RAY of light in Jeremy's bleak life. If you wish to congratulate him, e-mail him at [email protected]!
Week 1 (8/10 to 8/16):
Jeremy L, (aka jermy, germy, pyrofist) for continuosly filling my guestbook up with worthless posts until I was forced to archive it not once, but twice. All in a few days. Congratulations, Jeremy, you have won the LAMER OF THE WEEK AWARD.Jeremy's other hobbies include terrifying various furry critters and acting out his favorite final fantasy scenes in full costume. He also enjoys dancing to tribal chants and microwaving ants. If you wish to congratulate him, e-mail him at [email protected]!