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Grablen the Impaler began his life as a young dwarf aspiring to become an optometrist in a local town. He was nearly finished with school when a fateful accident occurred. After mistaking a fountain of magma for a shower to cool himself, he temporarily lost his vision. This cruel irony crushed his hope of one day rendering all of the world visionless.
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After finally stumbling both blindly and drunkenly to the local Magical Eye Trama Center, he was taken in for rehabilitation. Though their efforts failed, Grablen fell deeply in love with a "beautiful" young dwarf woman named Greta, who was also being treated for a crippling eye disease, known as "Corneus Magmatitus". The night they were to be wed, Greta decided to go spelunking in a volcano, which erupted in yet another ironic tragedy. Swearing vengeance for his deceased bride, Grablen swore to one day destroy all volcanoes.
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Years passed as the blinded Grablen crept along the countryside, looking for the volcano that would be his first victim. He finally found his target : Mt. Victima Blanda. He made a slow crawl up the mountainside, and into the very heart of the volcano itself. Before he laid his charges labeled "NaCl", (which the local death vendor promised "could split Space and Time itself") a local dreadlord by the name of Bal'Thanis intercepted his ploy. He made an enticing proposition. "We will offer you, young dwarf, eyesight, a dreadlord form, and a yacht (named The Pearl) to you, in exchange for giving all credit of the deed to the demons, since we are all in desperate need of some street cred.". Grablen readily accepted the deal and tossed the NaCl into the bubbling magma down below, which erupted violently, forming the mountain range of Redridge and Blackrock Mountain. Space and time were indeed bent, for Grablen's home-made pocket watch (which never really worked) now worked worse than it ever had. He survived by being transported to his yacht conveniently placed near the Maelstrom, which destroyed the yacht instantly.
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A mysterious spirit spoke to him while he was floating on various bits of debris. She also had a proposition. In exchange for hiding his true dreadlord self, she would save his life and return him to his native land. But in doing this, he would have to give up his evil ways, including his outward dreadlord form. Grablen yet again accepted a life changing offer by a total stranger, and was transported to a very very deep hole filled with rattlesnakes. After befriending the rattlesnakes, he became deeply emersed in their culture and society. He later convinced the Snake King, called Long Fang, to order his brother snakes to construct a Snake-Ladder for him to climb out of the hole in exchange for fresh meat. This was accomplished, and an entire family of gnomes were brought as tribute for the snake king
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To test his new found eyes, he decided to stop by "Ye Olde Local Azeroth Video Rental" and pick up a few movies. That night, he watched the Exorcist and immediately decided to follow the Light as a Paladin.
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The End.
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