The Official LURCH 2000 Kerry-Bot Watch

By Matt Forge

Most people are unaware that the Democrats have launched a new tactic in the war against conservatism - the LURCH 2000 Kerry-Bot. LURCH stands for "Liberals United Repelling Conservative Hacks." It is a masterpiece of technology and human engineering. Liberals hail it as the last great hope for socialism. It's sole purpose is to win the 2004 presidential election and crush Republicans.

The LURCH 2000 Kerry-Bot has not been without its flaws, though. Here we cover its travels in an undated timeline format. Use this page to keep tabs on its actions and whereabouts. Be on the lookout for this monster for it may be invading your small town next. Be afraid - be very afraid.

Just click on a description to view it...