Ok, so it's been way too long since I've written anything at all. I'm full of vigor and inquiry, but for now, that can wait. Besides, I'm just wondering, what did I really expect when I took this quiz?
hmmmm... ok, so that didn't work. Anyways, it doesn't matter. I'm actually quite delighted with Maria and how we love one another. I'm actually quite apprehensive about it. It's not that I want it any less, it's just foreign to me to actually be wanted rather than needed. I guess I'm just not used to that. I'm so used to having to "change my world" to be accommodating. But she just loves me for who and how I am. That is so precious to me.......
Alex
4/8/03
I don't know exactly what it is lately that has made my mind so anxious and erratic. Maybe it was waiting for my accountant to tell me just how much of my own money I need to pay to Uncle Sam, or it could've been that one of my best friends was getting married this past weekend and in watching him start his new journey I saw so much reflection of myself in many ways, or maybe it was that I've been getting used to being over-worked and it just feels wierd to slow to a more managable pace, or maybe it was that I got stomped in my pool competition last week (the team definitely had a vendeta against me, Lou better be ready for me in 8 weeks, just a warning...) and I'm looking to have a "rackless match" tomorrow night, or maybe it was just that I don't like to see someone I care about suffer, or it could've been that I just feel like a kid in a candy store and don't know what facet of myself I want to explore first: romance, music, leatherwork, ropework, fetish furniture, or whatever I fancy. I have so many things that I like and want to do that I have trouble deciding what to turn my attention to sometimes. I'm so delighted right now that I kinda want to run around and do a little of everything!!! grrrr..... to much energy sometimes.... is that a bad thing? hmmmm... I guess it's a good thing, considering all of the things that I could be missing out on otherwise....
4/9/03
Hurray!!!! Short day today!!!! Maybe I ought to head to Cue after I compete at The Cue Club... There's some people that I miss seeing around...