READ "ALL" POEMS
OFFICIAL WEBSITE OF FARHAN NOOR
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Exploding...
Exploded into zillion fragments of Passion for Love,
Take my soul away Lord and let it whizz like wind,
And imprint on it, words after words, the Passion I have within
And take my soul away to Your Domains,
And tame that exploded Passion, tame my struggles for it and bring
Me an everlasting, spiritual enlightenment of satisfaction
Show me of Your beautiful Images & let me kiss each one of them,
Free my soul and let it cry until it wilts,
Until the dreams I've dreamt of You turns real,
& I become deaf and dumb; blind to the world where I live in.
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Allah,
Give me that Creativity,
The sense of colours that I may use to represent Thee
The vision of divinity so I may use it to reach Thee
The spiritualism that I may use to find Thee
In some beautiful Dream,
Give me the sight of Your Beauty,
Enthrall me.
O Allah,
I beg with all that I possess, with all my limited knowledge
Please touch my hand that madly seeks for Thee
Enlighten my body with Your Magnificent Light,
Radiate inside of me, O Allah,
I cry now, never I have been so desperate
For Thee and now my eyes refuse the sight of this world,
Somehow I just can't seem to concentrate,
Each time I just succumb to helplessness.
Allah,
Induce in me, even a grain of Your Infinite Creativity
So that I may use it in my poetry,
And show You the immense Passion I have for You within me.
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Darker the coffin , darker the soul
Deeper it is rooted , deeper are its wounds.
Tantalizing tortures , drenched in blood
Speak up, I can't perceive your fretful yawls.
Tottering ground spits your bones out,
My rats masticate your rotten flesh.
Darkness has subdued you inside out,
Your senses have be-numbed, emotions at halt.
Darker the soul , darker the sins
Deeper in Hell , deeper in flames.
Till eternal you shall sustain and suffice.
See, how without nails you are crucified.
A Home where you'll live without doors,
Led in rooms of luxe, heated with fiery coals.
Mounted upon, that's how you shall rove
Catered with decayed bones, satisfy your hunger.
Darker the sins , darker the scowls
Deeper your cries , deeper your howls
Distorted figure, you can't imagine at all
Now you understand what ugliness is all about.
Harpoons perforating your rock hard heart,
Razor-sharp scissors editing your lively tongue.
Your eye orbs are being pricked with needles,
You saw them in pain , now feel what you saw then.
Darker the scowls , darker the terrors
Deeper the time , deeper the sufferings.
Sun's on your head , water's a far ahead
To attain, you must walk upon the spears head.
Your tear of surrender shall generate more distress,
Consent with the fact you are here forever.
From birth till death you dwelt in deluxe
For a change now savour an untried mode of pleasure.
Welcome to my humble Infernal Regions,
I am the Appointed Lord of Hell -
The Darkness in coffin is the darkness I am,
I'm the Possessor of the soul clothed with darkness,
I'm called c0fF|NdrK, my Shadow descends down in Hell.
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PART I
When the tears fall
& cuddle into the depths of sand,
When every view looks so vague
You nod your head in total despair.
& when everything's out of control
& that when only sorrows are but there,
You feel so sad, so left out
As if you've lost your last card.
So softly does your life now go
You lay in a corner all idle all alone,
You've lost the magic of those smiles
And the heart beating fast at times.
You've been erased from everyone's life,
You just simply take those pills
And let them eat your life.
PART II
When even hope deserts you,
& your power of reasoning numbs.
You smoke cigarettes & drink heavily,
You have no clue from where you begun.
It's been a long time your tears tasted ground,
That too last came when you were hardly twelve.
Sadly from all this huge crowd, nobody found
That you were actually dying for help.
In hope you had your trust secure,
In hope you saw the all mighty cure.
You knew it was your last card,
But somehow you had to let it all go.
In deploration & despair you gave up,
You weren't blind, yet you stumbled stones.
You tried to tell what actually you had felt,
But everybody you knew betrayed your trust.
So you decided to make yourself a noose,
Your head was in & legs shivering on the stool,
Summoning all courage, justifying the rule
In hope you won so in hope you must loose.
PART III
The world inside emptied,
As the feeling of isolation creeped.
You headed towards the burning sun,
But you fell down from the turning wheel.
& the tears just bursted out,
& cuddled into the depths of sand,
& the sand oozed out from your hand,
You now decided to let the soul go free.
So you broke all the trends,
You left but not against their will.
Mounting upon a camel,
You are now heading towards eternal sin.
Your dreams were your last card,
They sold it while you were asleep.
Eyes closed, standing in a desert,
Presenting the hungry vultures a treat.
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The contempt's from the stranger's eyes,
A weakened hope and all the vain tries.
On a hill I stand with a strong breeze beside,
Scripting on a stone, the way I died.
A bullet from a cold shaking metal gun,
Blew the brains embedded in my skull.
Unconscious and oblivious and dark and dull,
My legs surrendered the support and down I crumpled.
Heavy showers started to downpour on my corpse,
The rats and birds dined on my flesh and bones.
Within moments they drilled thousands of holes,
There were none to at least bury the leftovers.
I kept on questioning the God Almighty,
"Why does it always have to be me?"
Reasoning with all, I still couldn't believe,
Hell with the scattered brain,
The broken bones that laid,
But those same miseries and pain,
Of which I had to do all this,
Are still left in my conscience,
God,
Why Me?
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The candle is burning
With a tall flame,
Soon my pictures would be turning
Into black ashes.
My pen is writing on a piece of paper,
Something about pain.
Should I go and surrender?
Or should I keep all the blame?
Of course, my friends betrayed me,
Turned their backs and left.
I guess this is the way they feel,
That I'm worthless.
I always liked living alone,
With the candle flickering near.
I would go on and burn all my pictures,
And let all memories to disappear.
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Out there in the shadows of evil clones,
A girl with open arms awaits for me.
With dirt & dust upon the bodies of broken bones,
A tear, a sad hope now awaits for me.
I narrate my worries to the only accepting soul,
I cry and let my fears come out.
Only at the verge I now peek into reality,
How long will I keep my dreams going?
One day I'll too perish and leave immediately,
Let it be with a broken heart & packed with miseries.
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Thy world squanders me,
Laughs at every tear my eyes release,
Shakes my humble soul to smithereens,
You despise me at what God buildeth me?
Where thy arth drops my cold blood,
Shall the roots of pain will floodeth.
Behold! Silence will conquer the foggy world,
As clouds will bursts with blood all over,
Point thy finger unto only to me,
For so shall I be the source of thy miseries.
Under, hidden in black dark cloaks,
Removeth will be by me thou arth's souls,
Dance with ringing of the bells,
For here cometh's your faithful Death.
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No mercy amidst you and me shall peek,
Today be found the mighty and the meek.
Eye-to-eye shall the fight be inflicted,
Upon the blood shall the result be depicted.
A heart of sorrow that pounds so hollow,
Upon this wrong path you made me to follow.
You blackened me, poisoned my ardent soul
You deceived me into eating that fiery coal.
Myself shall now always burn in Hell,
Who'd heard of escape when in flame he'd fell.
Today is the beginning of the end,
'Satan's Grave' be marked upon by my pen.
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Come to me,
Come through the deep depths of pain,
Among the pile of corpses,
Piercing through images of anguish,
Come to manifest my existence,
To witness Darkness shadowing,
Under where I stand for you, waiting.
Come to me.
Come and be my loving friend!
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Destiny blurred with shades of pain,
Coloured, bleeding with tortures
So thickly vague, even light reflects back
And pierce through mortal's brains.
A Destiny terra incognita,
Profound , stabbing logical reasons
My destiny lies in a never-ending abyss,
I, lying in a chasm of never-ending pain.
Ah, how can I relieve myself
When I'm arrested by my Present ?
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Strolling for the sake of peace,
Found a Cemetery abreast of me.
Humble bones scattered over the ground,
The dead ones laid down in deep sleep.
My fingers pierced through darkness,
Seeking for an eternal bliss,
Upon my grave, will any shed a tear?
Or mark a stalk in where I shall lay?
Will the casket be long enough for me?
And open enough to let the darkness seep?
I fear the light , cause it once blinded me
Regenerated my lost hopes and my lost dreams.
I fear the entrapment of my soul, put to chains
In some form , given an another life to live
I fear the anguish that would once again come in
And free all my fears and conflicts within.
I stroll for the sake of eternal peace,
Will this Cemetery be my bride of serenity?
Will it kiss my crimson burning flesh,
And help me gather all my lost pieces of sanity?
Should I now make myself a noose?
And prepare for the bliss I'd imagined to be true
Will this Cemetery betray me like my friends did?
Nodding my head, I began weeping on my lifeless grave.
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the day she wished to be like me
for attributes I possessed -
that day I left dreaming to be like her
for everyone's dark inside.
- FN
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Search for a reason to live,
Hear what your heart has now to say,
I know death is a trigger away,
But there is someone who needs you to stay.
Search for the meaning of what they speak,
They make pain inside you to increase,
But I know this only is a bad dream,
At least live to see the face of your kids smiling.
Deary,
Never say die.
With a heart so light,
I'll now start to cry.
Put that gun away,
Please.
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Look yonder at the girl that sings,
Her voice the most pleasant.
Behind her the mountains & sun appear,
However, her beauty is greater than theirs!
She sits and sings those love songs,
She, as if, has remembered someone!
Those who listen to her will cry,
Surely her voice melts the rock!
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You broke the trust I laid upon you,
Simply even not knowing the fact that,
I loved you so much and so true,
Did not even a single thought browsed you?
What happened to the affections we had,
Was that too all a part of your mood?
You used me and threw away the pieces of love,
Like a jigsaw puzzle it laid scattered, untouched.
You pushed me all through these moments,
And I hugged you, kissed you - not knowing
The serpent, which was inside your body, living
The poisonous venom did harm my soul,
As you threw me away, broke the chains of love
I will never trust you again.
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I trusted the words on my book,
So I held them out in open,
Somehow they all changed their meanings,
People started to look at me from queer angles.
No - I'm not insane, I'm human
Why can't you look it from my angle?
All I wrote was what I felt and feel,
You, me, everyone has painful memories.
The tears you dropped at my poems,
I thought you understood what I had meant,
But you went on to wipe words from it,
I was shocked, bamboozled, how I interpreted.
Sadly, all that I did possess were words,
Now I have nothing to feed my hunger.
I've been plagiarized,
And painfully murdered.
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...'cause I'm sensitive to it,
Even to words that are blunt.
The pain from it starts roaring,
And my heart starts to burn.
'Cause I'm really helpless at it,
There's nothing that can be done.
But I never point my finger at anyone,
And alone I cry and alone have fun.
Goddamit, if only someone could understand,
And keep their mouths shut for once.
Even the friends release those words,
Then they say sorry of what I heard.
Great! You kill a person,
And then plead them to wake up.
What insane! Stop those praises,
I don't need a single one of them.
I'm happy with who I am,
Sensitive and shall never change.
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I'm so sad today,
I've got nothing to think about.
I'm all blank today,
There's nothing to write about.
I do feel pain,
And the cold wet tears that drain,
The delicate touch of the wind,
And my paralyzed body laying.
Is there something I should know?
Or is there something for me to tell?
Is the outside world wrapped in snow?
Or is the outside hot as hell?
I don't know,
I don't even know who I am.
I'm so angry today,
I can't express my feelings about.
I'm so dirty today,
I don't know what to do about.
I do feel strange,
This life is taking me as a live bait,
They've gifted me with all the pain,
Day by day I'm turning insane.
Is there something I should know?
Or is there something for me to tell?
Is the outside world wrapped in snow?
Or is the outside hot as hell?
I don't know,
I don't even know where I am.
I'm all broken,
I'm all in pain,
That's the only thing I know,
From my beginning till my end.
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Sleepless often at nights,
Turning off all lights.
Dead silence prevailing,
When my heart is failing.
Thunder lightnings outside,
Are keeping me alive.
Staring at the walls,
It's how I spend the nights.
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No one stands in others boots,
Pound in others heart,
Nor think the way others do,
Yet they come & rip you apart.
They advise you not to do,
And guide you to the dark.
Snatch away all your food,
Yet they stay and never part.
You are just a clay my friend,
Being moulded around all day.
If you ever want to readily live,
Let the moulders peacefully play.
In this world full of hate,
Tattoos mark the persons name.
Their births are their deaths date,
You and I, we both are same.
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In vain,
Those tedious strains,
Dedicating hours and hours to it,
In drain.
Why do the results betray?
The devotion I put in?
Sweat that accumulates,
Pouring out of my brain.
In shame,
As head rocks down,
Failures meet the eye,
Body starts itching,
Releasing only but sighs.
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Lost between darkness and light,
A place where day and night coincides.
Where reasons battle for an answer,
Am I the one in or outside the mirror?
Confused and bewildered,
A place where time has stopped to grow.
Tears battling with sad despair,
Taking up all roads but nowhere to go.
Lost like the words of love I once whispered,
Lost in search for a destination.
I knocked for a lodging,
The door began to close & I stood there standing.
Lost like the once beauty of a rose,
Lost in our own two faced worlds,
Where in light we preach and pray,
And in dark we let our minds go stray.
We are all lost, lost as one could be
Our presence is as far as our shadows can reach,
Surrounded by silhouettes resisting to reach infinity,
I am but a traveller, lost in search for a destiny.
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I loved you from the soul of my heart,
I took great care to keep that love.
I didn't want a second from you apart,
But I guess it's the end of the affair.
Several memories brushed my brain,
I couldn't keep the dreams away from me.
They were so many that went like a train,
Which gave wild shivers in my bloodstream.
The fresh air we inhaled together at parks,
The moment when we just gazed at each other.
I remember them as it all happened the last hour,
Your laughs and smiles ring around in my ears.
We shared our feelings and secrets,
We talked with each other in brief.
We would stop and gaze the others face,
But never in life we got tired of it.
Our emotions and moods talked themselves,
Our eyes spoke about our inner intentions.
It was impossible to hide any aspect,
And thus was revealed in matter of seconds.
Our relation was like the earth and the moon,
If one taken out the other would die soon.
You left me alone promising to return,
This is the 'Ray Of Hope' on which I carry upon.
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Please,
Listen to me,
Share my feelings,
Feel sorry for me.
I need someone,
To hold me,
Guide me,
Take care of me,
Reason with me,
Insult me,
Lie to me.
I need a friend,
I need it desperately.
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Correct me if I'm wrong, but do not
praise me for no reasons at all,
flatterings might go into my head,
& I would end up declaring myself a god.
Guide me if I go stray, but do not
be there when I can find my own way,
`cause in future I would be needed to compare,
what is Truth, what is deceit
so I'd never fall again a prey.
Teach me if I'm needed to be taught,
teach me about life & death, so I do not
be ignorant of where I stand,
whether in light or in darkness, I must know my land.
Love me if I'm supposed to be, but do not
hate me when I must not, rather tell me
and point where I went wrong,
so I can mend and be what I was.
Let you and me be friends,
& help in each other's cause.
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The days go by
without a single excitement of happiness
of the feeling of success of a day well spent
writing on the chapter of life without words
going on and on but without a page to turn.
and as the memories of past collide with the present
the colors fade and fade but never fade to black
of complete darkness as in dying.
and each day spent does not count as what left
the life increases more and adds up to what's been dwelt.
no eyes recognizes this face that has lived from always
the sky does not shadow it the ground does not hold it
happiness saw it but mocked at the sorrow and sadness
and gone by was the wind without even waving it.
the hurt heart pounds and beats and throbs itself
the fantasies does not even promise a good dream to cherish
no match lightens up the candle of hope as if its there
the destiny lies ahead so vivid and so clear
alone shall it be broken shall it be wasted shall it be
always.
refusing to stop and heal the wounds it has inflicted
going on and on knowing of its immortality for in perpetuity
laughing at the widespread flat laid body on a floor careless
the dreams dreamt are now too distorted to be fulfilled
the love felt is now proving much too painful
going on and on as if maybe someday this road will halt
and give the tired mortal being something to think about.
as it reveals a new something each time something is aquainted
the first revelation being the ascertaining with the factual faces of friends
then the cost of trying to break free from what blessed with
then the attempt to bargain the life with death
then to think of any possibility that might suit the head
know it that the going days reveals the consequences of all
time is not a friend.
weakening at once any strength that kills the slumber
the hands shakes and shudder the feet quiver and shiver
the voice that once rumbled now mumble the forlorn tale of its master
the death sits and hear and claps and asks for more
on it goes on it goes the story goes on telling its only listener
beauty of life is but the thorn of a rose
& the days go by…
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(these poems are but only few chosen by the author from the book)
Copyright © 2001 by Farhan Noor. All Rights Reserved.