Military vs Zombies
I�ll admit something here because I want to be honest with all my readers. I actually saw the first 20 minutes of this movie. Why the first twenty minutes? Because I found the first 20 minutes to be very boring and just irritating, so I turned it off. Now, what made me want to watch it again? Well, I figured I�ll give it one more chance to see if I still find it boring and irritating. Plus I needed a movie that had the word �Day� in the title.
Sarah, a somewhat good looking scientist chick, is in a helicopter with John, a black Jamaican dude who�s the only one who knows how to fly the plane (Isn�t that convenient?), William, a dude who looks like Mr. Bean who�s the only one who knows how to operate a radio or anything electronical, and Miguel, an army dude who�s boinking Sarah. They are looking around for survivors, survivors being people who weren�t dead at one point and don�t want to eat skin, guts, and brains.
They don�t succeed, so they go back to their hideout, which is underground somewhere. They are met by two other army dudes, Steel and Rickles (No, not Don) and they tell them that the main Army dude, Cooper (Probably a reference to the first �Night of The Living Dead� movie) died and his replacement is Rhodes.
Let me save us a whole bunch of time and say that Rhodes and his army dudes don�t like Sarah or her fellow scientist friends, Ted and Dr. Logan, whom they all call Frankenstein because he hacks the zombies open and experiements with them. The whole reason they�re down there is so these scientists can find out why they become zombies when they die. But Logan is more concerned with training the zombies not to eat us. His main �specimen� is a zombie dude he named �Bub�.
Bub remembers things from when he was human like books, razors, telephones, and most importantly, guns. Rhodes, meanwhile, is impatient and wants to kill all the zombie �pus-heads� and just leave. Leave where, I don�t know and I think neither does he.
The way Logan as been getting these zombies to experiment on is by going to this area called �the corral� where the zombies are and they snag two at a time. Well, Miguel is sort of freaking out because he�s been down in this cave for so long that his mind wonders and he lets go of the restraint that�s holding a zombie, which proceeds to bite Miguel. The army dudes shoot the zombie and Miguel runs off screaming. Sarah catches up to him at this little trailer thing John and William have set up for themselves and she proceeds to cut off Miguel�s arm before he becomes a zombie.
Well, Rhodes and crew come in and want to kill him, not only because he might turn into a zombie, but they don�t like him cause he�s such a klutz. Sarah stops them from killing him and John and William let him rest in their trailer.
Sarah says she needs medical stuff from the lab part of the cave and William tags along in case Rhodes and the other asshole army guys want to cause trouble and bug her. She manages to get stuff and they find out that Logan is using the dead army guys to experiment on. And to make matters worse, Logan uses the army guys guts to feed Bub.
Rhodes finds out, kills Logan, and throws Sarah and William into the corral with the zombies. Rhodes tries to get John to fly him and the army guys out but he refused and Steel proceeds to kick the shit out of him...
Until they hear the big ass elevator that lets them go up on top. They know it�s Miguel and they go stop him. But it�s too late and Miguel is up on top. He opens the gate that stops the millions of zombies outside from coming in and lets them all on the elevator, then lowers it.
Then all hell breaks loose.
Rhodes leaves Steel and Rickles behind to get eaten while he protects himself. But he doesn�t last long cause Bubs managed to unchain himself and he found a gun and, well, yeah, he shoots Rhodes, causing him to fly back into a wave of zombies who eat him. You know what Rhodes says as his last word?
�Salad Bar!!!!!!!�
Ok, he doesn�t really. I had the closed captioning on but I think it�s much funnier to think he yelled �Salad Bar!!!!!� as he was getting chomped on.
Needless to say, Steel and Rickles also get chomped on. And Sarah, John, and William manage to get on top and take the helicopter to Jamaica or wherever they ended up at. Yay, a happy end for a zombie film.
I was able to tolerate it this time around, although I�m not sure why. I still found all the army guys annoying and wondered why they were all so evil. Then I thought about �28 Days Later� (Another �Day� movie about the end of the world) and how the army guys were evil in there as well. So what Hollywood is trying to tell us is if the end of the world were to come, we can�t rely on the army for help because they�ve become evil assholes who just want to have sex with underage children and rule the world and everything else and not give a crap about anyone else.
Hm. Maybe I should sign up for the military.
2 stars.
�Day of The Dead� on IMDb.com:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088993/