What? Where's Sandra Bullock?
A little glimpse into how much into movies I am:
I spend a lot of time discovering what movies are going to be released like months in advance and learn everything I can about them before the teaser trailers start showing up and I can go on and on about what the movie is about and impress my friends about this newfound knowledge. So one day I'm doing this and I just see the title "28 Days Later" and I'm thinking, "What the hell, they made a sequel to that Sandra Bullock movie? Is she drunk, AGAIN?!"
Then I look into it and find out it's a zombie horror movie, an independent film starring no one famous, and it's from England. So I was like, "Ohhh, cool". And now here I am today, after watching the film for the first time, and getting ready to tell you how cool it is.
Three animal rights activist break into some research lab called the Primate Research Center, where scientists tie monkey's to tables and make them watch violent images. While trying to free the monkeys, a scientist interrupts them and tells them if they are free they'll spread a disease, and lo and behold they get free and spread a disease.
That up's the number of movies featuring monkeys spreading a disease to, maybe, three million. But I'm just estimating here.
So then some days later...damn I forget how many days later, it kinda slipped my mind. Maybe it's 29...no 27...eh whatever...
A month later a dude wakes up in a hospital, completely naked for some odd reason. He finds the hospital trashed and no one around. He gets dressed, grabs some Pepsi, and roams around London just yelling "Hello?" which is probably the offical catchphrase for this movie, because at random parts of the film people would yell "Hello?"
The dude stumbles into a church where he finds the priest running rather oddly and about to eat him. So the guy smacks the priest with his bag full of Pepsi. While more flesh eating people chase the dude, two people in gas masks and a flame thrower comes to his rescue, and they manage to blow up a small town. Woo!
Hiding out in a conveinence store, we find out the hospital dude's name is Jim and the two people who saved his skinny English ass are Mark and Selena. By the way, Selena is the token black person in the film, just so that's clear. Why this role wasn't offered to Scary Spice is a mystery, I'm sure she's not doing anything right now.
Anyway, Mark and Selena explain to Jim what's been going on for the past 31 (no that's not right either...) days, which is a virus spread all over the place and the "infected" people get really pissed off and try to eat you. Jim is all worried about his parents so the next day, which might make it 30 days later...(that don't seem right either...) they go over to Jim's parent's house where he finds them, in their underwear, dead. Turns out they took the easy way out and killed themselves. They decide to spend the night at Jim's house. Jim is sure it's ok with his parents to do so.
While having an odd flashback, two of Jim's neighbors, infected, barges in, rather rudely, and tries to eat Jim. They manage to eat Mark but Selena chops them with her machete before they could completely eat him. And because the virus spreads when the "infected" blood enters your blood, you turn into an "infected" 10 seconds later (That'd be a cool name also), Mark starts to get "infected" so Selena hacks him into itty bitty pieces. And she looked like she was having a great time at it too.
So Jim and Selena are roaming around and spot Christmas lights in an apartment building, so they go there and meet Frank and his daughter Hannah, who's about 11 or maybe older. The age matters because something rather creepy happens later. Anyway, Frank picks up on his radio a message from the military saying to go to some city for shelter and food and whatnot, so they pack up Frank's cab and take off.
Along the way they get a flat tire which they change rather quickly because "infected" people are coming after them and they also stop in a grocery store and stock up on non-parishable items so they can get in free to the Farm Aid concert. No, wait, that's not why.
Later, while trying to sleep, Selena gives everyone Valium to help get to sleep. I mention that cause it's important also. Later on (35 days later...no...) they get to the city but dont find any military people around. All upset, Frank gets frustrated at a crow, which is "infected" and it drops blood onto him, making him "infected". Before Jim could kill him, the military decide to reveal themselves right then and there and shoot him. I guess they wanted to see someone get "infected", I dunno.
So the military dudes take Jim, Selena, and Hannah to their main base where they meet Major Henry West. He provides them with a shower and food and introduces Jim to Mailer, one of their own who got infected. Henry kept Mailer alive to study the "infected" to see how long they can go without eating before they just die. Then everything turns to shit.
Jim finds out Henry is going to kill him and use Selena and Hannah both as sex slaves for him and the army. Now you see why it was important to know how old Hannah is. Isn't that just weird and creepy? Yes, I thought so.
Another army dude is against the idea so Henry locks him and Jim up, where Jim learns that the whole world really isn't infected, just England, which is kept quarentined. Finding that out, he manages to escape the two army dudes who was going to shoot him in the forest, makes his way back to their house, sets Mailer loose in the house, Mailer "infects" some army dudes, and Jim manages to scoop up Selena and Hannah before any weird Caligula stuff happened.
Then 28 days after that-OHHH THAT'S IT!! I get it now!!!! HAHAHA!-Jim, Selena, and Hannah are living in some farm making a big ass word out of sheets and curtains and dresses. What's that word you ask? Guess? Go on guess?
Give up?
"Hello"!!
Thought I was goofing about that catchphrase thing, huh?
Anyway, a plane swings by and we only assume they stop to pick them up cause it just kinda ends there. Oh, and we also assume Henry was right and all the "infected" starved to death.
Considering there was a lot, and I mean a lot, of male nudity, it was a low budget independent film, no real famous people starred in it, and it was a British film, this movie was pretty good. But if there was a sequel to this, and let's face it it's a horror movie there's gonna be a sequel, what would it be called?
"Next 28 Days After"?
"28 Days After Next"?
"28 Days Laterer"?
And what would it be about? Hmm...how about...there's one guy left in England who wasn't saved and he teams up with a talking car, a giant dragon, and Sean Connery (playing himself) to fight zombie "infected" goats.
You know, it's crazy enough to just work.
3 stars.
"28 Days Later" on IMDb.com:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0289043/