December 5, 2002 | 6:18 PM

Amy Irving�s Big Comeback

Amy Irving, the actress, and Eric Stoltz, the actor, were sitting together having a chat at a party celebrating a private screening of Bossa Nova, a spicy new film directed by Ms. Irving�s husband Bruno Barreto. She�s the star of the movie, too.

Ms. Irving had a glass of Merlot in one hand; her other hand rested on the left knee of Mr. Stoltz, who was wearing a turtleneck sweater and khakis. The two looked like they knew each other very well.

I interrupted them and asked her to name five or 10 things sensual.

"You want to know what turns me on, honey? Is this a come-on? Or is this an interview?" She took her hand off Mr. Stoltz�s knee. "I think the water in the north of Brazil, the feel of the water on my skin, a caperinha and a cigarette," she said.

"For me," Mr. Stoltz said, "it would be the thought of the water on Amy, in Brazil�that�s sensual.

"A first kiss."

"Fierce or first?" Mr. Stoltz asked.

"A fierce first kiss. I�m thinking what I�m allowed to say but I won�t get in trouble for. There are so many things I cannot say, I have children and a mother alive. Well, No. 1 is sex with my husband. All the sexual fantasies American women have about Latin men are deserved." She looked over at Mr. Stoltz, who was stroking his chin. "Now he wants to sleep with Bruno!"

"Jeez, I don�t know," he said. "I like oral sex, but I don�t know if I can say that, because Amy�s a wife and mother, and I�m friends with her."

"You didn�t say oral sex with me!" she said.

I tried to get them to talk about food.

"I like oysters!" Ms. Irving said. "I�m afraid they really are for real a wonderful feeling in your mouth. Am I a lesbian?"

"I like the thought of Amy eating oysters and contemplating her sexuality," Mr. Stoltz said. "Food. I�d say any food. I�m just a, I�m a food whore, really, in a good sense � Dessert always works."

So Mr. Stoltz got up to get some desserts. When he got back, Ms. Irving was talking about actors who turn her on. "I must say I really liked kissing Alec Baldwin. He�s a good kisser, really good. We did a film called The Confession. Actually Bruno, when he saw the film, he kind of kicked me, he said, �I can tell you�re enjoying yourself.� And I have to say when that soccer player [in Bossa Nova] pushed me up against the wall, I had wounds on the back of my shoulder where I�d been thrown up against it, and I just treasured them. I treasured my shoulder wounds."

"Can we go to teenage years now?" I asked.

"You know what, I have a teenager now," she said. "Eric, you tell a good teenage story."

"I think that you have more than enough teenage stories, Amy," he said.

"Actually I remember when Eric and I first met and he wanted to know if I had a daughter like me at home. You�ll never live that one down! But you don�t feel that way tonight, do ya, baby?"

"Not after seeing that movie," he said.

Ms. Irving began talking in earnest about her teenage years. "I moved to Manhattan when I was 11. I was at P.S. 44, then I was at High School of Music and Art, and then I was at Professional Children�s School."

"I went to the High School for the Performing Arts, the Fame school," Mr. Stoltz said.

"We were right opposite each other!"

"Actually I didn�t," he said. "I was just making that up.

"That�s the best thing to do. We should just make it all up. Yeah, my favorite teenage fantasy is when Albert Finney came to my house and had me on the floor, on the piano, everywhere. I used to have a thing for Albert Finney. After he was in Joe Egg [in 1967], I followed him from the dressing room, stage door to the restaurant, just kind of crying, wanting him. And he wouldn�t sign my, my program."

"Can we talk about Carrie?" I asked.

"Carrie 1," Ms. Irving clarified. (She was in Carrie 2, too.)

"Love that movie," I said.

"Me too," she said.

"Bad question?"

"That was the question? It was a bad question." Ms. Irving took another sip of wine. "Do you want me to speak dirty in Portuguese?" She said a few things in Portuguese, then offered a translation. "The first one was �Go fuck yourself.� The second one was just �fuck it� and the third one was �son of a bitch�, that�s all."

Mr. Stoltz said something in Hungarian, then translated it for me. "It means, �May a horse shove his dick up your ass,�" he said. "It�s a pretty good one, isn�t it?"

�George Gurley