| Sunsets and Stars |
| They say that silence is golden...but now the silence in my room makes me tear myself apart searching for explanations. I long for any noise to distract my mind from churning up deep thoughts and hidden feelings that I feel are better off left alone. So many thoughts whizzing through my brain make me numb to the hurt, yet I still feel. I plead with myself not to bring up the recollections that will hurt me more, but they come. I sit stone-like for what seems to be hours, never moving. All at once a flood of happy memories overtakes me and I fall to my back with my pillow over my face, wanting to scream. I weep uncontrollably and mourn for a relationship that has plummeted beyond any hope of repair, gone like the dew on the morning grass. I can still hear his voice, still see his face. I can feel his touch on my hand as he told me he simply didn't love me anymore. How could anyone just stop loving so abruptly? When I open my eyes and remove my pillow from my face I notice the sun has gone down, but all the bright stars I love so much, little diamond flecks against an endless backdrop of nothing, have started to appear. And that is when I realize the potential my life holds. My hurt and sorrow are like the fading sunset. It is beautiful in it's own right...my pain is beautiful because I must be broken to be healed. But it has disappeared beyond the horizon. Only afterwards, after I have healed, can I be like the moonlit sky...free to shine on my own. |
| I wrote this during my 8th grade year. Freakishly enough, it's almost prophetic of things between Luke and I. |