Send in the new team of Inspectors
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Have you noticed anything fishy about the inspection teams who have 
arrived in Iraq?  They're all men!

How in the name of the United Nations does anyone expect men to 
find Saddam's stash?  We all know that men have a blind spot when 
it comes to finding things.  For crying' out loud!  Men can't find 
the dirty clothes hamper.  Men can't find the jar of jelly until it 
falls out of the cupboard and splatters on the floor....  and these 
are the people we have sent into Iraq to search for hidden weapons 
of mass destruction?

I keep wondering why groups of mothers weren't sent in.

Mothers can sniff out secrets quicker than a drug dog can find a 
gram of dope.  Mothers can find gin bottles that dads have stashed 
in the attic beneath the rafters.  They can sniff out a diary two 
rooms and one floor away.  They can tell when the lid of a cookie 
jar has been disturbed and notice when a quarter inch slice has 
been shaved off a chocolate cake.  A mother can smell alcohol on 
your breath before you get your key in the front door and can smell 
cigarette smoke from a block away.  By examining laundry, a mother 
knows more about their kids than Sherlock Holmes.  And if a mother 
wants an answer to question, she can read an offender's eyes 
quicker than a homicide detective.

So...  considering the value a mother could bring to an inspection 
team, why are we sending a bunch of men who will rely on electronic 
equipment to scout out hidden threats?

My mother would walk in with a wooden soup spoon in one hand, grab 
Saddam by the ear, give it a good twist and snap, "Young man, do 
you have any weapons of mass destruction?" And if he tried to lie 
to her, she'd march him down the street to some secret bunker and 
shove his nose into a nuclear bomb and say, "Uh, huh, and what do 
you call this, mister?" Whap!  Thump!  Whap! Whap!  Whap!  And 
she'd lay some stripes across his bottom with that soup spoon, then 
march him home in front of the whole of Baghdad.  He'd not only 
come clean and apologize for lying about it, he'd cut every lawn in 
Baghdad for free for the whole summer.

Inspectors! You want the job done?  Call my mother.