Oh yeah, I'm sure Lord Orang won't really approve of my really girlie pink colour scheme, but at the time, I was in a really cheesily happy mood, so don't complain!
Lady ELF.
xxMWAH!xx
"I'm sorry, I have to...er, water my shoelaces."
This excuse can work extremely well on a dumb boss. Also, from my own experience, it can work very well when frequenting a night club and the pissed-out-of-his brains-muppet-boy tries to get off with you!
Quality excuse number two:-
"I can't, I'm afraid... I have to babysit my chair..."
This excuse is simply wonderful if, for example, one is requested to go carol singing with a local church group. Since they pride themselves on being caring people, they'll think you're extra-compassionate if you can't engage in carol singing because you're already taking care of someone. Just remember to scarper before they realise you can't actually baby-sit a chair...
Quality excuse number three:-
"I simply MUST brush my tree, it really can't wait til later."
This excuse works well with those new-age freaks who assume that brushing trees is a new fad which will circulate positive energies around your garden or something bonkers like that. Just be careful, and get scared if they offer to help by letting you borrow their energy crystal pendant thingies... (You've been warned!)
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