My Mother
Christine Baugh
ENGL 1100.46

In a recent class, my group had the opportunity to read Amy Tan’s essay "Mother Tongue." I enjoyed it because I can relate to everything Amy Tan writes about her family and language. My parents were both born in the Philippines. Because they were born and raised in a foreign country, their accent is very heavy. My parents learned how to speak English at school, just like we learned how to speak Spanish or French at our schools. They moved to the United States around 1980 because my father joined the Navy and was stationed here. Knowing that I can relate to mostly everything that Amy Tan went through made me interested in writing about my mother.

I have been through everything that Amy Tan has gone through with her mother. Growing up Asian American can really be difficult, especially if one is going through the struggles that Amy Tan went through. My parents always tried to raise me the same way they were raised in the Philippines, even though we were in America, except that while I was growing up, my mother never taught me Tagalog, the primary language in the Philippines. She never took the time to teach it to me because she thought that it would be better for me to just speak English and not Tagalog. Of course, growing up in a bilingual household, I’ve picked up bits and pieces, but I cannot speak it. The only time Tagalog was spoken in the house was when my parents were fighting or relatives and other Filipino friends came to visit. Other than that, my parents would speak English. Sometimes, I would be forced to speak for my parents when someone wouldn’t understand what they were trying to say because of their heavy accents.

In the essay, Tan mentions, "They understand 50 percent of what my mother says. Some say they understand 80 to 90 percent. Some say they understand none of it." My mom can speak fluent English, but because of her heavy accent, people can’t understand some of the things she says. When my friends come over and speak to her, they usually just nod to everything she says because they don’t understand what she is trying to say. This can be so frustrating when she tries to talk to my teachers or when she tries to buy things at stores. I always have to be there with her to repeat everything she says that people can’t understand. A lot of people usually take advantage of this. Most of the time, my mother doesn’t understand what is going on. They know that because she doesn’t understand, they can confuse her and talk her into buying worthless things.

Amy Tan also says, "But I do think that the language spoken in the family, especially in immigrant families which are more insular, plays a large role in shaping the language of the child." I do believe that the language spoken in the family can influence the child. Sometimes, I felt like my English and my grammar would be affected by having to break things down for my mother. She wouldn’t understand big words or sentences that were very long and descriptive. Everything would have to be broken down and I’d have to use smaller words for her to understand what was going on. As a result of having to do so, my grammar scores for the SAT were low and the English subject in general was not my strongest point. Since I’ve had previous problems with English, I’ve found it very discomforting and I’m shy to speak my mind, thinking that what I have to say may not make sense.

Another thing that Tan mentions in the essay is the fact that she realizes that she uses a different language with her mother than with everyone else. Being around a person who doesn’t speak correct English can influence someone to use it without even noticing it. Tan refers to it as the "language she grew up with." I’ve been in an environment where "broken" English is spoken, and that affects the way I speak to this day. Without noticing it, I might be speaking and say something that wouldn’t make any sense to other people, but would make sense to me for the simple fact that that has been my way of talking while I was growing up. And I feel that this could affect my future and me.

Sometimes, I would be embarrassed by the fact that my mother couldn’t speak English clearly. I would be ashamed and feel that her quality of English would reflect on people’s opinions about our family. Sometimes people think that my family is stupid because half of them speak "broken" English. People assume that foreign people are stupid just because they were raised a different way and speak a different language. In my experience, teachers would just assume that I was dumb because I struggled with writing and wasn’t up to the level that everyone else was. But I’m just speaking for myself. I have never asked an international student if they have experienced the same thing. Just because a person can’t speak the same language or they weren’t born and raised here, doesn’t make them dumber than other people. I think that this is a problem that is happening to foreign students.

When my mother doesn’t understand something, she gets frustrated real easily and we always end up arguing. The way that she interprets things is so different from what something really means. I think that knowing two languages can be an advantage and a disadvantage. It can be an advantage because being bilingual can help someone in different ways, such as writing or reading in both languages and if you were to visit a foreign country, you can get around. It can be a disadvantage because knowing different languages can affect the way that someone interprets different things. Even though learning different languages has its advantages and disadvantages, I still think that it is important to at least try and study one because it can be very helpful in the long run, and learning a different language definitely has more advantages than disadvantages.

Another thing that I can relate to in Tan’s essay is the fact that my mother can understand things better if she reads something more than if someone were to explain it to her. Some people don’t know how to speak to her, and that causes her to get confused. If she reads something, she interprets it in a way that will make her understand. Either that, or I have to break everything down and explain to her in a way that she can comprehend.

The fact that she can’t understand things well can be so frustrating because I am not with her all the time. I’m not there to interpret her words to help other people understand what she’s trying to say. She’s been in an English speaking country for more than 20 years and her English has gotten better. But no matter how long she has stayed here, her accent is always going to stay because she was raised in the Philippines. And I think that that is the biggest reason why people can’t understand her. Like me, for an example. I will never have an accent like my mom because I was born and raised in America. I haven’t even been to the Philippines, but I would love to go someday.

Even though no one can understand my mom, I can understand her clearly. I guess that is because I have grown with her “broken” English and I think that her way of speaking is normal to me. Tan mentions how her mother’s "broken" English helped her shape images and the way that she saw things. I think that the way that my mother speaks does the same to me. Every time that my mom tells a story, she exaggerates so much, but makes me see things that no one else could. Only I can understand the way that she expresses some things.

Even though my mother didn’t teach me Tagalog, I still think that it is important for people to learn and study a different language. I was fortunate to be able to understand the language even though I can’t speak it. I think that being able to study a different language can help a person write better and understand more about different cultures. Learning a different language can help a person realize how hard it is for people coming from another country to speak. It will help other people realize how much people struggle and how easy it is for someone to take advantage of them.

Even though I’ve gone through a lot because of my mother’s struggles with the English language, I still admire her very much. I admire the fact that she wants to learn English to make our lives better. I admire the fact that she knows two languages, and because of that, she is very intelligent. Most of all, I admire the fact that even though people make fun of her and take advantage of her, she still stays strong and doesn’t let that get to her. My mom goes through a lot, everywhere she goes, but she still manages to stay strong. I didn’t write this to make her sound like a stupid person who doesn’t know English well. If anything, I wrote this because she inspires me. I am really glad that I was given the opportunity to read "Mother Tongue" in class. It made me realize that I’m not the only one going through this and without reading it, I wouldn’t have realized I had this narrative to write.

Works Cited
Tan, Amy. "Mother Tongue."