Insanity
By: Thomas Heiser
The large man clumsily looked up from
his shot glass. How long had he been there but he wasn't sure and he no
longer cared. He did know that it was near the closing time of the bar he
was currently at. The place was nearly emptied except for some young
couple in the corner who was putting on some display. That was where his
eyes were fixed when the tall slim gentleman asked him a question.
"Hey pal, do you plan on leaving tonight?'
The fat man turned his gaze from the lovers and responded, "You know, I
used to do that sort of thing, when I was their age."
The Slim man responded, ignoring what the other man had just said, "Am I
going to have to make a phone call to get you out of here, sir." The
sir part of that statement had a strong accent on it which maid the drunken man
wince.
"God I am trashed." Stated the drunk while taking a queer new notice
at his shoes. "I had a real bad day at work, I mean
reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaal bad day." After this the young couple left the
bar in a very drunken ball of gestures mumbling something of the sort of
goodbye. "Have you ever killed anyone?" States the drunk
after turning his glance towards the bartender and forgetting about the couple.
The bar tender just looked up from the glass he was polishing and then put it
down on the shelf with all of the other long stems. The fat man took this
as a sign of interest and continued about his bad day. "You know, I
work over at that piece of shit hardware store down on 5th.
Oops, gee, I am sorry did I say work, I meant to say worked. I got fucking
fired today. Do you believe that? Been there for 20 years and I got
fucking fired."
The tall man looked at the fat man and thought him no older than 30. He
though of asking the man his age, but thought it better not to interrupt his
little spat.
"Ever wanna fuck a girl so bad that you just can't take it no more?
Man that was how I felt today when this broad comes and starts asking all sorts
of questions, like, well about something. I can't remember what she asked,
but I replied, 'Hey, you real pretty, wanna go mess around in the employee's
only restroom?'"
At this the tall man let a small and almost unnoticeable smile loose from his
usual stoic face. "You just said that out of the blue?" asked
the tall man real slow like he was talking to a small child and wanted it to
understand.
"Yeah! What wrong with just stating what you want! I wanted her right
there and then! It wasn't like I was asking to do her in a dirty place.
Man, women hate fucking in dirt. I don't fucking know why, I love to fuck
in dirt, man. And you know what? The employee's bathroom is real
clean and shit. It ain't like the ones in front of the store. This
one even got a cushioned toilet seat! Imagine that, cushioned and all.
'Bout the only thing there that I liked."
Right then a cop blew bye stopped the fat man from telling his story, he turned
'round and just kept staring until the bartender asked him what the woman said.
"Well, that is just the thing, man. She didn't say anything!
She just started to scream! Man you ever step on a rat and listen to it
before it died? Man is was just like that! Fuck I think if it was
any louder, I'd be death, and we wouldn't be having this conversation!"
"You mean, deaf." Interrupted the thin one.
"Huh, oh, Yeah, I mean deaf." The fat man's eyes wandered from
the thin man's scarred face and moved to more comfortable scenery. He then
began to notice the theme of the bar. Very Japanese, all sorts of
lettering and swords. He couldn't understand how he did not notice it
before.
"What happened after the screaming?" Inquired the tall man, drawing
the fat man's attention back to the story.
"Nothing did happen cause she never fucking stopped. I musta really
scared her or something. She must have been one of them damn church
ladies. They always scared of sex, ain't they? I tried to make her
stop and the next thing you know me and her are wrestling like on WCW or
something and she screamed still. Well, finally, her screaming brought
quite a crowd but none of them did a thing until my gay ass monkey-molesting
boss came. He started screaming at me and then he kicked me right in the
fucking side. That got me off of her al right. I got up and just
swung at the son of a bitch. Damn ass hole just dodged it and then the
next thing you know he went to fucking call the cops I guess. I figured
that was the time to split, but just before I could exit, don't you know what
the fucker said to me?"
"You got me." Stated the tall man with boredom.
"He goes, 'Your fired!' Like I give a crap whether I am fired or not
at that point! Man he really fucking pissed me off. Now I am all
worried that I am going to have cops on my ass when I get home. Ain't
headed there yet and I am afraid to.
"I don't think you would get arrested or anything, sir." Stated
the bartender.
"No, that wouldn't have gotten me in jail, not that at least."
"What did you do something else?" This last statement from the
drunk had sparked an interest from the tall man.
"Yeah, I did, but can I trust you, I mean, like really trust you, man?
Cause I don't know if I should like go around and tell people about this sort of
shit."
"Well, well. You have to get it off your shoulder and I am very
trustworthy, but the way things look, you won't have to worry about any
police."
The drunken man looked confuse about not having to worry about police, but
decided that the man was trust worthy and began with, "Well, that bitch
pissed me off more than Mr. Prick the boss did. So I kinda followed her
home." The bartender raised one of his dark black bushy eyebrows.
"I wanted to talk to her. I swear that was it, you know just ask her
why she was such a bitch and all." The fat man looked down at his
shoes once again.
"Well did she actually let you in?" Inquired the dark thin man, now
fully interested in this drunken fool's story.
"Not exactly. The dumb bitch lived in one of those real slummy
apartments up on Angel Street. Man those doors are probably fucking
termite infested, man, cause hers broke like a chicken neck!"
"So you broke in."
"Hell yea, That dumb bitch wouldn't let me in. Started screaming
again, might have even went and called the cops if she even had a phone!
Well I just smashed in and started telling her my side of the story like I
wanted to, cause you know, that was the only reason I was up there. But
she wouldn't listen and she was wearing that tight ass shirt she was wearing
earlier. Did I mention that?"
"No." Replied the bartender, annoyed that he had to speak.
"Well you know what those kinda clothes do to a man! I just couldn't
stop thinking about fucking her again so I just climbed on top of her. And
well next thing you know she ain't breathing."
The tall man thought of how bad he felt for that poor woman, being stuck
underneath this 300 plus giant. He then went over and started pulling
close all of the blinds. As he was doing this he asked, "So you
attacked her, raped her, and then killed her?"
"Yeah, but you know what, I liked it. Killin' people isn't that bad,
you know. I feel so powerful. I guess you judge a real man bye his
actions and I think I am a real man. Just taking what I want, not being a
fucking pussy like all the other nobodies out there."
Bye now the tall man was standing next the fat man with a drawn katana sword,
the drunk did not notice it though. "Yeah, I understand what you
mean, but from one psycho to another, I think it is more important on how you
kill a man, not just that you kill him makes you a real man. You know what
I mean, man"
The fat man just stared at the thin fellow. All sorts of thoughts started
to flow through his slow, alcohol induced mind, but through them all, only one
stood out: He was in deep shit.
"This here is a katana, ever heard of it?"
"Uh, yeah, ninjas and shit." The fat one replied now thoroughly scared
and sweating profusely.
"Now you die." Stated the thin fellow as he quickly and
skillfully raised and lowered the katana decapitating the now obviously dead,
fat man. The man's head did not go far and landed between two unoccupied
stools, making a soft wet noise. The body slowly humped forward until it
fell landing neck first and there it laid with the man's very large ass up in
the air.
Right then the tall man noticed the fat man's shoes, they had dried blood on
them. "Now that was what the dumb fuck was looking at. We are
all killers fat boy, I am just better than you." He then let go a
weak frown. He had so much work to do, especially since this guy fucking
weighed so much. Why did he always have to kill the fat ones. Dawn
was drawing near, so he hurried himself.
The end