SOME FACTS OF LIFE
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BOYS A heart is not a playing thing, A heart is not a toy, but if you want it broken, Just give it to a boy. Boys,they like to play with things To see what makes them run, But when it comes to kissing, They do it just for fun. Boys never give their hearts away They play us girls for fools, They wait until we give our hearts And then they play it c ool. You will wonder where he is at night, You will wonder if he is true, One moment you will be happy, One moment you will be blue. If you get the chance to see him Your heart begins to dance, Your life revolves around him, There's nothing like r o m a n c e. And then it starts to happen, You worry day and night, You see my friend, you're losing him It never turns out right. Boys are great though immature, The $price$ you $pay$ is $high$, He may seem sweet and gorgeous, But remember he is just a guy. Don't fall in love with just a boy That's takes a lot of nerve. You see my friend,you need a man To get what you deserve. So when you think that you're in love, Be careful if you can Before you give your heart away Make sure that he's a man. GIRLS There are many good things in life, Like cars,$money$,and weed. But if you want something c o n f u s i n g, A girl is all you need. A girl doesn't say what she wants, But you're somehow supposed to know, If they want to do this or do that, Stay here,stay there,or just go. Then there's the time,you all know what I mean, That monthly little j o y, That lets them a b u s e the shit out of you, just for being a boy. If you ever dare to look at another girl, They seem to scream,go on,and panic. But watch how fast they ignore you, at the sight of that queer from "Titanic". They give you questions like, "Am I fat?", And "If you could go with one of my friends,who?", There is no answer, face the facts, You are definitely through. They take nothing and blow it up, And make a tremendous fuss, So girls no matter what you think, You are just as hard to u n d e r s t a n d as us. To get rid of the bad luck you may be having with the one you l o v e, send this to as many people as you can "including the person who sent this to you" in the next 24 hours........ 0 ~ You'll get bad luck with guys/girls for the next 2 years. 5 ~ Your crush will start to notice you. 10 ~ Your crush will ask you out. 15 ~ Your crush will kiss you. 20 ~ All of the above (except of course the 0 part).....and a n y t h i n g you could ever wish for will come true... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ************************* GIRLS r COMPLEX CREATURES ************************* If you kiss her, you r not a gentleman If you don't, you r not a man If you praise her, she thinks you r lying. If you don't, you r good for nothing. If you agree to all her likes, you r a wimp. If you don't, you r not understanding. If you visit her often, she thinks it is boring. If you don't, she accuses you of double-crossing. If you r well dressed, she says you r a playboy. If you don't, you r a dull boy. If you r jealous, she says it's bad. If you don't, she thinks you do not love her. If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her. If you don't, she thinks you do not like her. If you r a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait. If she is late, she says that's a girl's way. If you visit another man, you're not putting in "quality time". If she is visited by another woman, "oh it's natural, we r girls". If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you r cold. If you kiss her often, she yells that you r taking advantage. If you fail to help her in crossing the street, you lack ethics. If you do, she thinks it's just one of men's tactics for seduction. If you str at another woman, she accuses you of flirting. If she is strd by other men, she says that they r just admiring. If you talk, she wants you to listen. If you listen, she wants you to talk. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ******************** HOW MUCH U LUV SOME1 ******************** ORIGINAL QUOTE : If you love someone, Set her free... If she comes back, she's yours, If she doesn't, she never was.... Now the New Versions..... ******************** PESSIMIST: If you love someone, Set her free .... If she ever comes back, she's yours, If she doesn't, as expected, she never was OPYIMIST: If you love someone, Set her free .... Don't worry, she will come back. SUSPICIOUS: If you love someone, Set her free ... If she ever comes back, ask her why. IMPATIENT: If you love someone, Set her free ... If she doesn't comes back within some time forget her. PATIENT: If you love someone, Set her free .... If she doesn't come back, continue to wait until she comes back .... PLAYFUL: If you love someone, Set her free ... If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her free again, repeat * C++ PROGRAMMER: if(you-love(m_she)) m_she.free() if(m_she == NULL) m_she= new CShe; ANIMAL RIGHTS ACTIVIST: If you love someone, Set her free, In fact, all living creatures deserve to be free!! LAWYERS: If you love someone, Set her free, Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states that... BILL GATES : If you love someone, Set her free, If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees and but tell her that she's also going to get an upgrade. BIOLIGIST : If you love someone, Set her free, She'll evolve. STATISTICIANS : If you love someone, Set her free, If she loves you, the probability of her coming back is high If she doesn't, your relation was improbable anyway. SCHWARZENEGGER'S FANS: If you love someone, Set her free, SHE'LL BE BACK! OVER POSSESIVE PERSON: If you love someone don't set her free. HR SPECIALIST: If you love someone set her free by Offering her ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ******************************* YOU'VE LOST THAT LOVIN' FEELING ******************************* BEFORE - You take my breath away AFTER - I feel like I'm suffocating. BEFORE - Twice a night AFTER - Twice a month. BEFORE - She says she loves the way I take control of a situation AFTER - She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac. BEFORE - Saturday Night Fever AFTER - Monday Night Football. BEFORE - Don't stop AFTER - Don't start. BEFORE - Is that all you're having? AFTER - Maybe you should have just a salad, honey. BEFORE - It's like I'm living in a dream AFTER - It's like he lives in a dorm. BEFORE - $60/doz. AFTER - $1.50/stem BEFORE - Turbocharged AFTER - Jumpstart. BEFORE - We agree on everything AFTER - Doesn't she have a mind of her own? BEFORE - Victoria's Secret AFTER - Fruit-of-the-Loom. BEFORE - Charming and Noble AFTER - Chernobyl BEFORE - Feathers and handcuffs AFTER - Ball and chain. BEFORE - Idol AFTER - Idle BEFORE - I love a woman with curves AFTER - I never said you were fat. BEFORE - He's completely lost without me AFTER - Why won't he ever ask for directions? BEFORE - Time stood still AFTER - This relationship is going nowhere. BEFORE - Croissant and cappuccino AFTER - Bagel and instant. BEFORE - You look so seductive in black AFTER - Your clothes are so depressing. BEFORE - Oysters AFTER - Fishsticks BEFORE - I can hardly believe we found each other AFTER - I can't believe I ended up with someone like you. BEFORE - Passion AFTER - Ration BEFORE - Once upon a time AFTER - The end. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ *********************************** INSPIRATIONAL POSTERS FOR REAL LIFE *********************************** 1. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings . . . they did it by killing all those who opposed them. 2. If you can stay calm, while all around you is chaos . . . then you probably haven't completely understood the seriousness of the situation. 3. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security. 4. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. 5. Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity. 6. A person who smiles in the face of adversity... probably has a scapegoat. 7. Plagiarism saves time. 8. If at first you don't succeed, try management. 9. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. 10. TEAMWORK... means never having to take all the blame yourself. 11. The beatings will continue until morale improves. 12. Never underestimate the power of very stupid people ! in large groups. 13. We waste time, so you don't have to. 14. Hang in there, retirement is only thirty years away! 15. Go the extra mile. It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker. 16. A snooze button is a poor substitute for no alarm clock at all. 17. When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break. 18. INDECISION is the key to FLEXIBILITY. 19. Succeed in spite of management. 20. Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, Avoid Disappointment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ****************** REAL FACTS OF LIFE ****************** Facts of life: Did you know................. 1. At least 5 people in this world love you so much they would die for you. 2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. 3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to bejust like you. 4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you. 5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep. 6. You mean the world to someone. 7. If not for you, someone may not be living. 8. You are special and unique. 9. Someone that you don't know even exists loves you. 10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. 11. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world. 12. When you think you have no chance at getting what you want, youprobably won't get it, but if you believe in yourself, you probably will sooner or later. 13. Always remember complements you received. Forget about the rude remarks. 14. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know. 15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they're great. PERHAPS YOU WILL SEND THIS LETTER TO THOSE YOU CARE ABOUT. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ *********************** RULES TO FIND HAPPINESS *********************** God didn't promise days without rain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain, but He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the day. Disappointments are like road humps, they slow you down a bit but you enjoy the smooth road afterwards. Don't stay on the humps too long. Move on! When you feel down because you didn't get what you want, just sit tight and be happy, because God is thinking of something letter to give you. When something happens to you, good or bad, consider what it means. There's a purpose to life's events, to teach you how to laugh more or not to cry too hard. You can't take someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved, the rest is up to the person to realize your worth. The measure of love is when you love without measure. In life there are very rare chances that you'll meet the person you love and loves you in return. So once you have it don't ever let go, the chance might never come in our way again. It's better to lose your pride to the one you love, than to lose the one you love because of pride. We spend too much time looking for the right person to love or finding fault with those we already Love, when instead we should be perfecting the love we give. When you truly care for someone, you don't look for faults, you don't look for answers, you don't look for mistakes. Instead, you fight the mistakes, you accept the faults, and you overlook the excuses. Never abandon an old friend. You will never find one who can take his lace. Friendship is like wine, it gets better as it grows older. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
