It is summertime and my friends are ready to have a good time. I am always willing to say "ok". Missy calls me up and says that she can get us into the Unger House, a dance club in Caroga Lake if I drive. I agree. Before I leave the house, I call the "Brat Pack" and tell them where we are going, so they can meet us. Because this is Upstate New York, some friends do not have answering machines. So I change my outgoing message to say, "Melissa and I are at the Unger House, if you want to join us! Ask for Rocco, and tell him you are her friend." Then I left to pick up Missy. We headed up to the Unger House in Mom's car Lizzie, which they all called Lezzie, just to make me laugh and my mom cringe. We get there, they get Rocco, and Missy gives him a kiss.....Good job, Zookie! I think and say to Missy, as this guy is hot. We go to the bar, and Rocco starts lining up shots. The crowd is chanting, "Drink Robby Preston, drink mother fuc**r" fill in the blanks. I am feeling good! The D.J. starts to spin and we are dancing like there is no tomorrow. Missy buys a pack of Marlboro Lights, and now we are toking and drinking. This goes on for about an hour or two, before we are aware of the fact that we are drunk. Rocco, is thinking he is going to get some, and I am just happy to party and hang out without being shunned. Somewhere between, "Pump up the Jam" and "Love Song" something went terribly wrong. You see, Missy told her father that we were going to study at my house. When he called to see when Missy was coming home, he got the machine. Missy's father Carm, who is only 5'8 but built like a "brick-sh*t house" starts the drive to Caroga Lake. I am at the bar next to Missy who is sipping her drink and enjoying her cigarette, when I hear the Carms distinct voice at the door, "I'm here for Melissa", the doorman responded with, "there is a 5 dollar cover, and I don't know who Melissa is!." Carm responded with, "Melissa, is the sixteen year old girl, sitting at the bar with a drink and a cigarette!". Well, needless to say, in the true spirit of friendship, I b-lined for the side door! I waited in the parking lot anxiously for Missy and Carm. The door flung open, and I heard, "Do not think, for a moment you are driving home, Robert...and I see you over there." So I froze! Literally! He guided us to his car, with Missy and I in complete silence. He then explained that my mother was on her way up to get the car, and said to stay up until she gets back. All the way home, we are bewildered about how, he found out that we were there! As he pulls into the driveway of my house, he said, "And Robert, next time my daughter lies about where she is going, do not publish the truth on the answering machine." Melissa did a 360, like Rosemary's baby, and gave me an ice cold stare. The next day, It could have gone either way...but Missy just looked at me and said, "Your such an idiot!" we hugged and made plans for that weekend. The kicker was that Rocco, thought Missy was 19, so the Unger House was out!
Daniel, my best friend was working and living in Boston, while I was finishing my senior year in college. I would frequently visit, and we would party through the city. Daniel was also waiting on a promotion, so the deal was that if he got it, I would drive up, we would pop open some DOM, and celebrate. I got the call out of the blue, and went from Downtown Providence to Boston in 32 minutes (no easy feat). When I arrived at the door the music was blaring. We popped open the bottle and the celebration began. It hit us really hard, so we deceided to go easy by also finishing a bottle of Vodka and Cranberry Juice. (this is our style). I noticed that not only was his Christmas tree still up, but it had the lights lit up and it was browning before our eyes. I said to Daniel, get rid of that tree, it is February. I then went into the bathroom, but in the background I heard the music change to Barbra! Oh no, here we go.....ten seconds later, "enough is enough" was in full-force. As I left the bathroom, I started back towards the living room and almost passed out. There was Daniel from his third floor window, pushing out the Christmas tree, lights and all. I was histerical, I almost could not breathe. After a couple of pushes, most of the tree was out, and he took his foot and kicked the base. hard. The tree then toppled out of the window and ripped the cords right out of the wall. He then walked over, closed the window, and said, "There that is all taken care of". I didn't know what to say. I simply walked over to the window and looked at the limp tree lying half on the sidewalk and half on a parked car fully decorated. All I could think was when that person goes to leave they are in for the shock of their life.To make the gift complete, we walked down to the car and left a note under the wiper. It simply said, "Merry Christmas".
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