new york, new york

chapter 83

Air wasn't getting any cooler during the next few weeks. I negotiated about my book with e-mails I first sent to Finland and which my mom then sent back to NY. I thought it was ridiculous but surprisingly even Oliver had taken Jacob's side on this issue telling me it's not wise.
Book was set to publish in the end of June. I had suggested August because then my baby would have been born and I'd been closer to getting back home. But they wanted to publish it before tourists would be all over the city. Like they always weren't. I was little amazed because in the end my book wasn't meant for tourists but for people who came to live in New York. But getting earlier paycheck didn't hurt at all.

Boys had visited the town without me knowing anything about it. Well, I watched TRL (I had to tape it because Oliver was just over when it came out and he was sure that seeing a glimpse of AJ was bad for me � and in a way he was right) but it felt so unreal. I was thousand miles away from them. I couldn't have gone to Times Square even if I'd wanted to. And I didn't know. I did it once and that was enough. In the end it wasn't the same stand in the crowd than wake up next to a man you love, was he AJ or just some guy you met in a bar.
They seemed all right. Tired, but that that was understandable since they had worked like a dogs for few previous weeks promoting. Interviews they made concerned mostly their new music. They've got good reviews and focus was on that, for their luck. Jacob had told me very few facts of their latest actions, not wanting to upset me. I think Oliver had given him a nice little speech after finding the scrapbook.
As I had given to him about Michelle. So he surprised me and brought her to meet me.

That was one of the most awkward moments of my life. When she walked in, I felt enormously jealous for a minute. First she seemed like a real Californian girl. But then she turned into East Coast intelligentsia. And Oliver loved her. Really loved her. Maybe he didn't know it yet or wasn't ready to admit that but it was written all over him.
Michelle took my hand, looked me into eyes, smiled at me and said "Hello" with so friendly voice I was really astonished.
-Hey, I replied and raised my eyebrows at Oliver who also smiled.
-It's nice to meet you, Michelle said. -It took Oliver a while to tell me about you.
-Guess what? Oliver asked grinning. -Mom had already told her.
-Have to confess that I was getting little bit worried since it seemed to take forever from him to tell me the truth. But we all have our past, right? And I think that our relationship is exceptional. God, I moved after Oliver just weeks after I'd met him. I wanted to get out of San Francisco as well but he was the reason I chose New York.
-Charlene? I asked from Oliver.
-Michelle went to buy some books and mother thought it would be good to enlighten Michelle a little.
-And you're not mad? I asked from Michelle.
-As I said I was. But then I realized there must be a reason why Oliver isn't telling me. And there is. He made very clear that I couldn't tell anyone that I've seen you. So you're having problems with your permit of residence?
I thought it for a minute and then nodded.
-I know, it's so awful! Michelle exclaimed. -I have cousin who lives in France and she wanted to come to work in here but couldn't get green card. Regulations are so hard.
-That's true, I said looking at Oliver. I didn't like the fact that we were still lying to Michelle. But it was better cover story than I could have ever come up by myself. Charlene popped in.
-Tee, anyone?

Rest of the visit was peaceful. Michelle invented thousands of things I could do while laying in bed and was determined to bring me some IQ knots to solve. All I could do was shake my head and smile at her. She was so genuinely sweet that it seemed almost practiced. But wasn't. She sparkled and so did Oliver. When they left it was easy to say to Michelle that it was nice to meet you.

I wiped sweat off my forehead and sat down. I was getting bit clumsy even if my stomach wasn't that big. My mom had told me that she was the same when she gave birth to her first child. When she was pregnant, no one noticed it and when my brother came into this world her friend's were like "were you really pregnant?". Still Charlene had to buy me new clothes. Hotness didn't ease my misery. I had troubles getting enough sleep. Partly because I didn't do that much during a day to get tired, partly because I took naps in daytime also and partly because it was so hot. So when voices intruded into my dream in the middle of the next afternoon I honestly wanted to cry.

-Be quiet now, we don't want to upset her!
Loud whispers were heard from the living room.
-Hey I'm up, I yelled with cranky voice. Door opened and Oliver came in. He was followed - for my amazement - by Jacob. Since when did they like to hang out together?
-What have I done to earn this unexpected visit? I asked like a lady of the house. That role went pretty easy for me as I was always lying in the bed. Oliver came to pile some pillows behind my back so that I could almost sit up. Jacob took a chair and brought it next to my bed.
-It's pretty hot in here, he noticed.
-There's something wrong with air-conditioner. Someone should come take a look at that. But when she's�
Jacob gave an evil eye to Oliver who concealed looking bit ashamed. As entertaining it was I got little suspicious about their behavior. Oliver also took a chair and came to sit other side of my bed. Next five minutes I kept turning my head like watching Williams's sisters to play.
-I got to think yesterday, Oliver started.
-And then he called me, Jacob continued.
-Which was weird but had to be done.
-It's OK. I was just a bit surprised. But I think we both want just what's best for her.
-I don't know about your motives�
-Well, you can hate me if you have to.
-I don't. But that's not an issue. Issue is that Michelle said magic words.
-Not that she loves you.
-Stop interrupting me, Oliver begged.
-I will. If you would be able to speak.
-Shit.
-Sorry. Go on.
I giggled. It was funny. Both men seemed a bit sour though.
-Go on, tell her, Jacob said.
-Well, Michelle mentioned something about residence permit and I know that your visa wasn't for a long time. So I found out that it already expired. Last month. So you're not supposed to be here.
-Tina has got several letters from immigration agency. She's confused because she thinks you've gone back to Finland.
-But it seems that they've got some information from Airline Company. And now they're after you.
-Which itself is bad, Jacob stated. -But in your case it's even worse.
-They already know that you were in hospital.
-And if they know�
-Anyone can find out.
I looked at my men. -Anyone? I asked. My voice was full of amazement but mostly I was just annoyed.
-It's not a joke, Jacob reminded. -You leave marks everywhere you go. And with your condition -
-I'm pregnant! It's not a condition.
I was still bit upset because they interrupted my lovely dreams to come in and tell things I couldn't really face.
-Well, you being pregnant and us knowing who the father is�
-Have you thought about going to hospital to give birth? Oliver asked. -You know how press can find out things like that. With your book being published and all.
-Matthew is still worried about that.
-Who is Matthew anyway? Oliver wanted to know but no one answered him.
We sat silent for a while. Tell the truth, I haven't really thought about things like that. It's not like you plan to get under public eye doing practically nothing. I didn�t know that my visa had expired because according to my original schedule I would have been in Finland for quite a while already.
-So what is your suggestion? I asked. Oliver and Jacob looked at each other. -What? I don't believe this.
I sighed. -You really came all the way to tell me this and you have no solution?
They looked ashamed.
-I've got few ideas� Jacob said softly.
-What?
-It's too early to tell. It'll take day or two to find out all the options.
-While I'm supposed just to hang around in here in this darn hot apartment knowing that there are now two reasons why I can't go out. It's really great to know that I don't have to worry about AJ anymore. Just that immigration agency is after me.
I was pissed. I didn't need to know. After all they were two adult men. They could have taken care of it. I wasn't supposed to be upset!
-So there's nothing we can do? I asked once more.
-There is. I� Um. I think I need to go find out right now, Jacob said and stood up. -Hope you don't mind a short visit like this.
-No, if you come back telling me that I don't have to worry.
-I can promise that even now.
-How?
Jacob didn't answer. -I'll call you. Tomorrow at the latest. Trust me.
-Do I have any other option?

Jacob left but Oliver stayed sitting next to my bed.
-How did it get like this? I asked. -When did it get like this?
Oliver shrugged. -All the time I've known you it's always been like this. You are special. That's about it.
I looked at the window where curtains flied in the air. Little bit of wind didn't help at all.
-Do you think you get that air conditioner fixed?
-I'm not sure. I guess I can figure it our somehow.
-I don't mind, I said. -Or I do. It doesn't really matter. But your mother deserves some sleep. After all she works and takes care of me and all.
-I know.
-So if I have to go stand in the closet for two hours, I'll do that. Sure, I get varicose vein, but she's been so kind to me. I don't think we should tell her that she's holding a criminal under her roof.
-Yeah, you must be right.
-You know, it's not lying. It's just leaving things untold, I tried to joke but Oliver was way too serious. -Okay, if that's all, could you leave now? Dawson's Creek is starting.
-It's rerun, Oliver pointed out.
-Yeah, but also first season. Who could resist those round teenage faces? And Pacey as a youngster� Oh he makes my heart bounce.
-You're weird.
I grinned. -Tell me something I don't know.
-There's nothing to tell. Not yet.
-Take your time, Oliver, take your time. It's not like I'm gonna go anywhere.

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