It's been a while...

It's Monday but I have a rare day off. Which is great. I'm visiting my mother once again and spending most of the time on computer. But it's only 8.30 am so I have plenty of time to be with her even after this.

So you wanna know what I've done lately? Worked. Like a dog. Which isn't great. Though I'm going to Vienna soon... Gonna be there for a week. One of my friends is studying there, I'm going to see her! Which is nice. We've been sending letters to each other all winter. And for all of you, sometimes instead of an e-mail, write a letter. It's worth writing since then you really have to think what to say and it's not like copying every other line from your friend's e-mail and giving one-liners as response. (Uh, I certainly hate that! You sit and write a nice, long e-mail to delight my friends and what do they do? What I get back is most of my own e-mail. Pixie is a good exception. I miss ya, girl... Maybe I should write to you!)

What about my stories? What about those? Yeah, I know, I haven't been writing as much as you'd want to. Too bad. I'd like to write more! But it's just some case of not being able to. I just finished version 4398754 of my movie script (so called "real" writing) and I guess I'll get back on fan fiction after that.

Love life? In a way does exist. In my early years I used to want things, like houses and cars and other stuff just for myself. And now? I'm learning a painful lesson of being unselfish. And it sucks! Because suddenly I'm thinking this whole family thing, house in the country, few kids, maybe a dog, big family car... Just because of one man. He doesn't know this, thank god, it would scare him off. But still... I'm freaking myself out! Me, always such a selfish little bastard: "Sure you can do that to make you happy if it doesn't hurt me". What is happening to me? I don't know. Which isn't nice.

I've promised to mention one of my fellow workers in here. So this is for you, Ha-ha-man. Can you be such a pain in my life? And yet you make me smile... :) Sometimes. But it doesn't mean I wouldn't hate you. You see the thin line between being friends and just a boss and an employee? Sometimes I know too many things about you and you know way too much about my life (since I told you) but we just have to figure it out some funny way. And I hope that these few days away from office don't change everything like they had a habit of doing.

I'd love to be a groupie. Let's face the truth. 'Almost famous' is still one of my favorite movies and once we went to Helmut Lotti's concert last Friday (which was cool, I was there with my family, it was for my mother, you know, I'm not all that middle aged yet), I would love it. In a way. As much as I love our chauvinistic atmosphere at work (Ha-ha). I should go out much more.

Cause I want drama in my life. And since I haven't been writing it, I want to live it. What to do? Should get back on writing and be my dull self. No! I want champagne and premiscious sex and drugs and rock'n'roll and a future like Ozzy has (unless I'm not dead by then).

OK, here's the truth. I would like that about two weeks. And then I'd be dying for my own bed and my boring life. In the end... Is my life that boring? I can always pretend to be a groupie, I can write more 'Mia - Cara' and make you happy too, right?

A new perspective wouldn't be bad. Maybe Vienna helps a little. (Home sweet home.)

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