Here is a question that has boggled my mind. Have you ever noticed that the most English challenged individuals are also the most mathematically enhanced? A lot of Chinese people excel in the mathematic field, but have you also noticed that they're stubborn little assholes? That's right. Chinese people are assholes.

There is nothing worse than putting up with Chinese assholes than when you're working at retail. The other day, a chinese man came in because he wanted to buy an antenna for his roof. The first thing I thought was, "Outdoor Antenna! That's a great sale!!!" I was so excited that I overlooked the fact that he was Chinese. After I brought down the $70 antenna, he was astounded by the fact that he had to spend an extra $12 on a mounting bracket. "It Shoulda be incruded!" he yelled. I replied, "If you look on this wall, you will see many types of brackets. One for a slanted roof, one for a flat roof, one to mount it against a chimney. Instead of including it and charging you extra for the wrong one, we let you take your pick." He bought the bracket best suited was for him, and I helped him carry the antenna to his truck.

As my diagram shows, the left hemisphere of the Chinese brain is filled with mathematical statistics and equations. But if you will notice the right hemisphere, where common sense is usually stored, there's not a lot there. You will also notice that the driving skill is not present in the right hemisphere. Vital everyday life skills are missing from the picture.

The Chinese man came in today, and it took over an hour for me and my fellow employee to get his ass out of the store. He wasn't able to get his antenna working. He had 2 cables running up, but couldn't figure out right side from left. So he did the common and sensible thing to do. He cut the cables. Okay, maybe not so common sensible. It took an hour to explain to him that he needed a $6 splicing kit to mend the cables, because they are video cables and contain shielding, as well as need outdoor protection from weather. He tried to convince us during that time that a 50 cent speaker wire connector would do the trick. Sure, you can try running that on your roof if you want to fry everything. After 1 hour, he left out the door with the splicing kit, and during that hour, not once, not even one time, did the thought cross his mind that he's a complete and fucking moron, as well as a stubborn Chinese Asshole.

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